a little advice on a personal situation..

[bquick13]

Marines,

I am bothered, and I need some advice. My ex-fiance is trying her absolute hardest to get me to take her back. She's come at me guns blazing, trying to convince me to take her back, and ditch this whole military idea, cause she doesn't like the military. She's even told me she doesn't support our troops, she's really closed minded about that for some reason, and its the God help you if you even join the National Guard kind of closed minded. That kind of ticks me off a little, just because my all of my HEROS are or were in the military.

I don't know if any of ya'll know where I'm coming from, but she's left me twice, and I took her back because I felt like she meant well, for some crazy reason. We mere raised to totally different ways. Shes a big city girl, and me not so quite. I was taught to manage my money, my funds, and resources, and she wasn't. That's a little frustrating. She's a year younger than me. She's still in high school, but we've been together probably about three years now. I honestly have been avoiding her for the last week and a half, because I know if I take her back, I won't be able to have anything to do with the military, and its time I make a decision.

She's a sweet girl, she's made mistakes, but so have I. But sometimes you gotta know when to hold'em and when to fold'em, eh?

My recruiter and I have bsed about it once or twice, and he said drop her. Which I think may be a little harsh, but then again she talked to a recruiter that come to her school, about if and he told her (to her face, and i front of others) she was "nothing but an angry girlfriend" (kudos to you sir).

But I am wearing thin Marines, its starting to mess with me physically and mentally now. I care about her more than I have for anyone else before. But, the Marine Reserves are constantly on my mind. Nothing motivates me like hearing the title Marine, or something about MCRDPI. I want that title. But she's dragging that away, ya know?

Shouldn't she support me in something I want, other than just put it down so much?

This has even been affecting my pt, its just so unmmotivating, and I don't know what the heck to do anymore, Marines. Because I think I try to keep my word, and I would like to keep it with her, I didn't just give her a ring for no reason. But now I'm seriously torn between the two. I'm not selfish, I don't think for wanting this, am I? I mean, if we get back together she can leave me, again. If I get that EGA, that's something that will never leave me, forever.

gimmie some opinions Marines. I know I'm not the only one thats dealt with crap relationship problems.

I don't mean to complain, or gripe about it, just looking for some advice from some people I look up to. :/

[tdrt]

Okay. This is from a Marine and a mom: drop her and move on with your life. I know first loves are the hardest, but it's time for you to move on and live YOUR LIFE! If you do not follow your passion, find your own joy, you will always regret it!!

And should you chose to ignore me and sound like pretty much everyone else and stay with her, you WILL come to resent her and eventually hate her.

This sounds like a very unhealthy relationship and she seems to be very passive-aggressive, control freak and a drama queen. Love is not this hard! Love is about supporting the other person, helping them follow their dreams, sharing their joy, etc. And sometimes, you have to suck it up and allow them to follow their dream even if it's not yours because their happiness ensures your happiness.

And do not even think about marrying ANYONE until you're atleast 30!!! You may not think so now, but the love of your life is waiting for you. Don't miss her while you're dealing with this.

[temarti]

fold'em and walk away, if you choose to go active and start a new life as a Marine, you will eventually find someone that is more mature and stable. As well you will have time to live life as you want to and not one with a high school attachment, that drama will never escape you.

Live your own life under the rules that you were brought up with and it will reward you two fold.

[TinDragon]

Pretend that someone else is in that situation, and you're giving them advice. Do you think you could tell them to stay in that situation? If you can't then the answer should be pretty obvious.

And if that doesn't help, this Marine says ditch her. Haha. Hell, if she's actually the one you're supposed to end up, she can find a way to deal with you joining.

[NCOPOWER]

You gotta know when to hold'em and know when to fold'em! This is one of those time you need to say FU*K that and move on. Trust me you will find plenty of others that are way better! You will also find the perfect one.

[Apache]

Sounds like you know the logical answer.
Do you want to be a "pet" or do you want to live your life as you see fit ?
Do you want to reach goals or continuly be placating one spoiled individual ?

[3522]

All excellent advice. Are you getting it yet? Walk away. Too many fish in the sea.

[Phantom Blooper]

Don't sweat the petty things.....

Just pet the sweaty thing.....

Then walk away.....

If you are wanting to join the Marine Corps or another branch of service....you do not need the excess baggage.

[Zulu 36]

Do you want to be in the Marine Corps or get stuck with a stone around your neck? She will undoubtedly try to get pregnant by you as soon as possible and you'll be stuck with her to some degree for the next 18-years minimum.

If she is really that anti-military and you really want to serve, you two have nothing in common strong enough to survive that disagreement.

She's left you twice. Why does she come back? Probably because other guys figure out she's mental really quickly and refuse to have anything to do with her.

Just tell her you've matured, she has not, you have your future planned, she isn't in it, and it is time to move on. Adios muchacha.

[SGT7477]

I would walk away it will probably get worse if you become a Marine and you don't need something like that dragging you down, she don't want to support the troops, let her support Jody and you can carry on.

[ameriken]

Run Forrest Run!!

[AKA HITMAN]

Send her packing....time for you to man up, you can find love elsewhere...

[ameriken]

Okay. This is from a Marine and a mom: drop her and move on with your life. I know first loves are the hardest, but it's time for you to move on and live YOUR LIFE! If you do not follow your passion, find your own joy, you will always regret it!!

And should you chose to ignore me and sound like pretty much everyone else and stay with her, you WILL come to resent her and eventually hate her.

This sounds like a very unhealthy relationship and she seems to be very passive-aggressive, control freak and a drama queen. Love is not this hard! Love is about supporting the other person, helping them follow their dreams, sharing their joy, etc. And sometimes, you have to suck it up and allow them to follow their dream even if it's not yours because their happiness ensures your happiness.

And do not even think about marrying ANYONE until you're atleast 30!!! You may not think so now, but the love of your life is waiting for you. Don't miss her while you're dealing with this.

What she said. Best advice yet.

[Artemis]

RUN......RUN AWAY really fast. This has bad news written all over it. Good advice from everyone all around.

[Marine84]

fold 'em