Family trying to talk me out of it

[gobuffs10]

Did this happen to any of you? My family is trying to talk me out of enlisting. Nobody in my family has ever served before, minus grandfathers. Here's what they say
"But you'll go to war..."
"What if you don't come back?"
"You want to kill people?"
"Once you are in you are in..."
"Can you handle someone yelling at you ALL the time?"
"My coworkers son is a Marine, she said it changed him."
"They lied to him too, said he would be doing one job, then gave him a rifle and sent him to Iraq."
"The Marines and the Army are the first guys in...how about the Navy?" (that one made me laugh)
"You have other options, I think you need to consider them."

It just sucks. I explained my reasons for wanting to do it and my mom recognized them as all valid reasons, then continued to give me ****. They didn't really say anything at first, a few weeks ago when I mentioned it, but now that they know I'm serious things have changed. My dad hasn't said much, so I don't know where he stands. My mom gave me all that crap and then said "I'm not trying to discourage you." Oh really? Sounds to me like that's EXACTLY what you are trying to do. My sister told me I ruined her night and hasn't spoken to me since I told her I wanted to enlist. The only people who are behind me are my girlfriend (kindof, and it's only because she is encouraging and way too nice for her own good...if she told me what she really felt it would be much different) and two of my friends. My best friend pretty much called me a retard for wanting to join. Nobody thinks I am going to follow through, and it's just becoming more motivation to do this (not that I need any...I have made my decision).

I'm just disappointed. I really thought my mom and dad would be proud of me, proud to have a son that wanted to be a part of the best. My parents are both firm military and Iraq war supporters, so their disapproval really came as a shock and it dismayed me a little bit.

How did you all get over negative reactions? It hasn't swayed me one bit (ok...it did for like 20 minutes) but it is still hard, trying to undertake something like this while knowing those closest to me do not approve.

[Goose]

My father & grandfathers all served in the Army. My Father wanted me to go that route. However, maybe the best thing is to explain to your folks is you want to serve because you want to honor your country. You want to keep this country free. Yes it's true it will change you.....For the better. I've be out of active duty for almost 20 yrs now. But I still walk tall and have better work habits than most of my friends from High School. I owe all of that from the Marine Corps. Yes there is a chance you may have to go overseas and fight. But that is the price of freedom. Be proud and respect your parents. Do your homework and when they say something negative about the Service come back in explain to them the postive. Good Luck

[dmdenike]

Just ignore them. There are plenty of people out there that just dont understand why we want to become Marines. I enlisted May of 07' and I've been hearing it for a year now. I just laugh and ignore it.

Your parents may not be supportive now, but I'm pretty sure they'll be proud and supportive when you graduate boot camp.

edit: just read your profile and realized your 20. Dont let them talk it out of you. You'll regret it and be the "I coulda been a Marine, I woulda been a Marine, or I SHOULDA been a Marine." Just dont worry about them, worry about what YOU want.

[davblay]

At the age of 20, you remind me of an old Beatles song:

"HE'S A REAL NOWHERE MAN
SITTING IN HIS NOWHERE LAND
MAKING ALL HIS NOWHERE PLANS
FOR NOBODY"!

"HE'S AS BLIND AS HE CAN BE
JUST SEES WHAT HE WANTS TO SEE,
ISN'T HE A BIT LIKE
YOU AND ME?"

Those words, to that song, were written more than 40 years ago!

It takes a certain knd of person to want to become a Marine, to give up the lifestyles of todays teenagers, but i am seeing it more ever day. Young people are deciding to do something to change thier lives, to get a headstart in the world, to find that challenge they haven't had in thier young lives. He wants out of his nowhere land with all his nowhere plans. He wants to see things clearly and find the group of people they feel like they fit into.

There a lot of choices today, as always. they can keep that nowhere job, paying nowhere wages, in a nowhere town (no matter how big or small the town), he can become a part of that nowhere gang, do drugs, etc..

But some choose the Corps as a guide post and stepping stone in thier adult career. Where they get that dicipline and honor and sense of commitment they so eagerly pursue. In this TOTAL VOLUNTEER MILITARY we have today, they have several choices there as well, but the Corps still has no problems filling our ranks with the cream of the crop, and will settle for nothing less!

Our brotherhood is unsurpassed by any other organization in the world! We have been around for over 232 years now and still strong. WE don't have to advertise "BE MARINE CORPS STRONG" everyone knows we are strong, the strongest!

So again at your age of 20, if you have made up YOUR mind, then what does it really matter what others think? Would they not be proud of you if you took a job that travels around the world, seeing exotic places and still defending our rights and freedoms, if it were possible without being a Marine? The odds of you Getting killed are no more than having, a fatal (or disabling) car accident today, with all the traffic and all, than it is surviving a tour in The War. Our men are better protected, better equiped and better motivated and better trained than I can ever remember in my lifetime.

If the Corps is what you have chosen, then make the announcement and go forward with your life. If evryone felt like Familes do, then where would our great nation be, still speaking the Queens Enlish maybe? Maybe the French would be speaking German today! My point is that every generation has it's war, and this one is your generations, mine was Viet Nam, remind them of that one!

Unlike MY WAR, all enlistments are 100% volunteer today. But if that fails, then the government will call all 18 year olds in for service! There are a lot of the 58,000 names on the wall of men that were drafted! Some were friends of mine! Ask you family and friends to pray to God that this WAR doesn't have a Wall with that many names on it when it is over. Oh and lest we forget 9-11?

This war will not end until the world is rid of the terrorist and anti american people of the word that's only goal is to kill americans! If not you then who?
If not now, then when? Do we want them over here fighting on our soil, killing our people in the streets like they are in Iraq?

I salute you, and young people like you, that choose to carry the torch into battle if need be to defend our shores! Hold your head up high and do what you have to do and follow your heart!

Good luck to you my young Warrior! Thanks for wanting to be apart of the elite! I know I am looking forward to calling you my brother one day.

That's my 2 cents, sorry it turned into a dollar!

Dave

[Marine84]

We ALL went through somebody telling us we were stupid, crazy as hell, and anything else they could come up with. My friends kept telling me that the Corps would make a man out of me - look at my profile - does that look like a man to anybody?

Your parents will eventually come around. The day you graduate will be their proudest day with you. Relax.

[JoeInVille]

Ive had similar things happen to me that LCpl. Green has had happen to her. People have called me crazy for even enlisting and sometimes even stupid for enlisting over going to College. My mom worked at a VA hospital during Vietnam so she definetly had some major opposition to it. I was in a very similar boat as you were but I didnt listen to anyone because I knew if I didnt enlist, I would regret it when im 28 and not doing anything or havent done anything to benefit my country or myself. Luckily my dad is as Gung-ho about the Marine Corps as you can get, so he supports me more than anything and is very proud of me already. Just like the Marines above me have said, your parents will eventually come around.

[Newski45]

In Quote and Reply to "gobuffs10" first post

"But you'll go to war..."
Heard that one before by my mom.
"You want to kill people?"
This one from my ex-girlfriend.
"Once you are in you are in..."
Mom again.
"My coworkers son is a Marine, she said it changed him."
Good ol' Mom yet again

My mom gave me all that crap and then said "I'm not trying to discourage you." Oh really? Sounds to me like that's EXACTLY what you are trying to do.
I know what you mean here, my mom said she's being supportive, but it seems like every time I talk to her she has nothing good to say about what I want to do. My favorite is when she told me that "It makes grown men cry." LMFAO, I already knew what I was getting myself into and I don't need to be reminded 24-7.

My best friend pretty much called me a retard for wanting to join.
Your friend is mad because he probably wishes he could join but is afraid to, or that you are going places and he is probably going to be stuck in the same town working some deadend job for the rest of his life, no offense or anything towards your friend.

[Big Jim]

In Quote and Reply to "gobuffs10" first post

"But you'll go to war..."
Heard that one before by my mom.
"You want to kill people?"
This one from my ex-girlfriend.
"Once you are in you are in..."
Mom again.
"My coworkers son is a Marine, she said it changed him."
Good ol' Mom yet again

My mom gave me all that crap and then said "I'm not trying to discourage you." Oh really? Sounds to me like that's EXACTLY what you are trying to do.
I know what you mean here, my mom said she's being supportive, but it seems like every time I talk to her she has nothing good to say about what I want to do. My favorite is when she told me that "It makes grown men cry." LMFAO, I already knew what I was getting myself into and I don't need to be reminded 24-7.

My best friend pretty much called me a retard for wanting to join.
Your friend is mad because he probably wishes he could join but is afraid to, or that you are going places and he is probably going to be stuck in the same town working some deadend job for the rest of his life, no offense or anything towards your friend.

I know that you think that your family and friends are coming down on you or enlisting...and maybe they are...but what does this tell you about what they think of you? It tells ME they don't believe in you very much...thats what I see anyway. You can't choose your family or your parents, so you're just going to have to deal with them like prove it to them or just ignore them, (which is probably what I'd do), but if your friends are calling you retard and crap like that...find new friends!!!

You have decided to make a committment that goes beyond yourself and shows the basjc integrity of yiour character!! the Marine Corps will refine that for you and bring it to its true maturity and make you a Marine!! IF you have the stuff!!! And when you do show them you have what it takes...watch your family and friends come running to you in an effort to show you their support! Sounds like they're unpatriotic to me. And its really demoralizing to think they won't support you while you're active duty. They need to show more support who gave them their freedoms and ability to have choice in their lives!!! But they are right about one thing...once you're in, you are in...you will have the support of an entire Corps of brothers and sisters!! No where in the world do you have a branch of service with the brotherhood and this level of comraderie! You have some choices and decisions to make!!

[AL49BGN]

I WAS LUCKY TO HAVE A FAMILY THAT SUPPORTED MY DECISION TO SERVE.HOWEVER IT DOES TAKE A SPECIAL TYPE OF PERSON WHO IS WILLING TO SACRIFICE A LIFESTYLE AND EVEN THEIR LIFE IN ORDER TO PROTECT THEIR COUNTRY AND LOVED ONES FROM THE DANGERS OUT THERE.THAT IS WHY THEY PROBABLY DO NOT UNDERSTAND AND WORRY ABOUT YOU.YOU JUST HAVE TO DO WHAT YOU FEEL IS RIGHT BECAUSE ULTIMATELY IT IS YOUR LIFE AND YOUR FUTURE.THE CORPS HAS A LOT TO OFFER IF YOU ARE WILLING TO PUT IN THE SWEAT AND SACRIFICE.GOOD LUCK!

[ElDiablo]

At least your parents didn't offer to buy you an '08 Mustang if you wouldn't join. They suport me and everything, but they tried to pursuade me not to go. I said no, and that was that, they somewhat except it now. If they told me they had a 1969 Mustang GT 500 Fastback, maybe we could have talked...LOL!!!!!!!!!

[darkgreen0311]

I had friends telling me man you're crazy, you want make it the Marines are tough. My mother and father wanted me to go to college with the promise of a new car. I wanted to join when i was 17 my mother wouldn't sign for me so i had to wait until i was 18. If it's something you really want to do don't let anyone discourage you..........My brother Dav Blay well said sir and Marine 84 Hell no!!! You don't look nothing like a man.





SEMPER FI 4 LIFE
YOURS IS NOT TO QUESTION WHY BUT TO DO OR DIE!!!

[rvillac2]

Marine 84 Hell no!!! You don't look nothing like a man.

Drinks like one, though.

Kim, I was just at Anchorage last month, across the street from Elmendorf. ha ha ha.

[Newski45]

I know that you think that your family and friends are coming down on you or enlisting...and maybe they are...but what does this tell you about what they think of you? It tells ME they don't believe in you very much...thats what I see anyway. You can't choose your family or your parents, so you're just going to have to deal with them like prove it to them or just ignore them, (which is probably what I'd do), but if your friends are calling you retard and crap like that...find new friends!!!

You have decided to make a committment that goes beyond yourself and shows the basjc integrity of yiour character!! the Marine Corps will refine that for you and bring it to its true maturity and make you a Marine!! IF you have the stuff!!! And when you do show them you have what it takes...watch your family and friends come running to you in an effort to show you their support! Sounds like they're unpatriotic to me. And its really demoralizing to think they won't support you while you're active duty. They need to show more support who gave them their freedoms and ability to have choice in their lives!!! But they are right about one thing...once you're in, you are in...you will have the support of an entire Corps of brothers and sisters!! No where in the world do you have a branch of service with the brotherhood and this level of comraderie! You have some choices and decisions to make!!

For me my Dad is the most supportive, and I'm lucky to have friends that are fully supportive of me, and wish me all the luck. Big Jim is right and follow his advice.

[Echo_Four_Bravo]

In the end, it doesn't matter what your family thinks. My dad was furious, it wasn't a pretty thing. But, I did what I had to do. You do as well. There is no way you can really answer the people that don't "get it."

In the end, they are just worried about you. They don't want to see their baby boy put himself in danger. They watch the news and see all of the bad reports from Iraq and Afghanistan. They never hear about the good things that are being done and the progress that is being made. So it makes sense that they are scared. I'm sure there were mom's that didn't like their sons joining the Marines in 1775 and there will be moms that don't like it in 2775.

[Marine84]

Drinks like one, though.

Kim, I was just at Anchorage last month, across the street from Elmendorf. ha ha ha.

A shiver just ran through me....................