Poolee getting married...need advice

[Parks]

If he doesnt get her in check now then he will have a very short stint in the Marines. I know several in my unit that were constantly receiving NJP because of their wives bouncing checks and creating chaos. Damn dependopotamus.

^^ This. I just did an adsep on a Marine who couldn't handle his finances. This is a situation that needs to be nipped in the bud NOW before he ruins his career. Time to man up and take control of his wife. (I don't usually approve of that kind of behavior but she obviously needs a wake up call.)

[Phantom Blooper]

If he goes to Japan unaccompanied...she can stay home and join the Biggest Loser.....win some cash and lose some weight....2 problems solved.

[spotts]

I think Phantom has a great idea. LOl

[wildwoman73]

Sad deal all the way around. And usually the Marine pays the biggest price. Financially, emotionally, and mentally. I too have seen many male Marines seperated due to duty from their spouses and the stress of work and home drama is more than some can handle. Wish him much luck.

[jclarke]

I think him getting his paycheck into a seperate account that she will NOT have access to is the best idea (as SoftBall stated). Then he can send her an allowance, OR, better yet, it will force her to get a J-O-B, and learn for herself how hard it is to take care of the rent, food, and other payments.

When I was 18, I went hungry for several day's, endedup jumping the wal at the state fair, and grabbing a job with one of the traveling show's to work on the ride's.

We're having a bit of a time getting our Marine to rein in his spending. When I saw the "adsep" in another post, I looked it up, then messaged him about it, and what it cover's. I hope that will influence him somewhat.

[jclarke]

We're hoping he continues to adhere to our warnings about gettig caught up into a relationship so early, and to use "protection" if/when something happens. I told him to do a 180 if the girl has one in hand, as I've known of them to poke pinhole's in the end's.

[SGT7477]

We're hoping he continues to adhere to our warnings about gettig caught up into a relationship so early, and to use "protection" if/when something happens. I told him to do a 180 if the girl has one in hand, as I've known of them to poke pinhole's in the end's.

That wouldn't be good,Semper Fidelis.

[Marinemom32]

We're hoping he continues to adhere to our warnings about gettig caught up into a relationship so early, and to use "protection" if/when something happens. I told him to do a 180 if the girl has one in hand, as I've known of them to poke pinhole's in the end's.

Nothing wrong with a woman/slash girl having thier own condoms, or in hand as you say.. Just make sure it is not out of the original packing, and it is opend up on front of them.

[jclarke]

Heh, I've known of that happening believe it or not. One never knows what the other might have in their mind, or might be scheming about.

[Marinestepmom]

Nick earned his PFC stripe this week. He's pretty pleased (and so are we). His training for his position is apparently going well and he likes what he's doing. Bride is headed down to North Carolina for the third time in a month...my younger stepson (Nick's brother) came over last night and told my husband that Nick said that the Marines don't like sending people overseas on their first assignment if they're married. Is this true? From what I've observed, it seems that marital status doesn't really matter because the Marines always come first (as it should be) and that they will send people wherever they're needed.

Bride posted some more lovely photos on her Facebook page (to add to the 600+ that are already there). The photos are of her and her friend licking each other's faces. They go well with the photos of her being totally trashed on her birthday. I don't know if she realizes that employers are now using these sites when hiring...

What is 'adsep'?

[Zulu 36]

What is 'adsep'?

An "adsep" is short for administrative separation. A myriad of reasons the military can separate you (fire you) without recourse to a court-martial. Excessive debts or inability to control dependents are just a couple of reasons for an adsep.

A disciplinary separation is one ordered by a court-martial, such as a Bad Conduct Discharge or a Dishonorable Discharge.

[jclarke]

IF she doesn't know, someone should give her a clue so she can get them removed. However, she might know, and, "might" be hoping one of your Marines' senior officer's see it. And that those may get him in enough trouble to cause an ADSEP. I DO know sites like that are checked on. I know of a guy who WAS in the Navy (he was 19 at the time), posted a pic of him and a buddy with something white under their noses, and holding a bottle of Old No.7, with a caption; "We smoke Jack and drink Coke!" Last I heard about him he was in the middle of some serious stuff, not sure he got got an ADSEP or another kind of discharge. But, he's not in the Navy anymore!

I also know of recruiter's in this area who DO look in FB to see what the poolee's and potential poolee's have posted. They look at everything from picture's to wall posting's. One saw that a Marine had posted on FB with his iPhone during firewatch at MCT. That Marine got in huge trouble, and his phone confiscated until the end of his MCT.

An "old" saying I heard, "Everything, anything you do, or don't do, WILL affect your family in one way or another. Maybe not NOW, but eventually it will!" Your Daughter-in-Law may have something up her sleeve for this very purpose, but then, I don't know her. It just "feels" that way to me.

Nick earned his PFC stripe this week. He's pretty pleased (and so are we). His training for his position is apparently going well and he likes what he's doing. Bride is headed down to North Carolina for the third time in a month...my younger stepson (Nick's brother) came over last night and told my husband that Nick said that the Marines don't like sending people overseas on their first assignment if they're married. Is this true? From what I've observed, it seems that marital status doesn't really matter because the Marines always come first (as it should be) and that they will send people wherever they're needed.

Bride posted some more lovely photos on her Facebook page (to add to the 600+ that are already there). The photos are of her and her friend licking each other's faces. They go well with the photos of her being totally trashed on her birthday. I don't know if she realizes that employers are now using these sites when hiring...

What is 'adsep'?

[Lisa 23]

I mentioned a few weeks back that I think Nick's dad needs to have a chat with him.
Nick's young bride is messing with his future and doesn't even know it, or maybe she does.
Either way, and for as much as no one may want to interfere with their marriage, I think it's time Nick's dad had a nice father son chat.
Nick has gone through hell and back to become a Marine, and she's going to mess it up with her childish behavior. She reeeeaaaalllly needs to grow up........and fast.......and start acting like a married woman that she is. Her childish behavior will not be tolerated on a Marine Corps base.....period!

[jclarke]

Someone should ask the Marine what kind of job he's willing to do should he get an ADSEP because of his "bride"?

And someone needs to straighten her up, asking her what kind of job SHE wants to work at, as well as for Nick when, not if, that happens. There are thing's parent's should keep their distance on, and there are some when they DO need to step in.

I mentioned ADSEP and NJP to our Marine because it seemed he was getting a little to "free". I also added "Please don't wait to do what is right because you've run out of choices". He got the "message", and got "back to work". I hate seeing anyone torpedo themselve's after all of the time and work they put into something.

[Harlee]

Marines don't like sending people overseas on their first assignment if they're married.

Yes, sometimes true because of the cost associated with relocating families. For example a single lower enlisted Marine in Oki will live in barracks, where one with dependent(s) on accompanied orders will rate housing, which can be worth several thousand dollars per month. Therefore if there is a choice between two Marines, one with a dependent and one without, the cost saving choice is without. The number of dependents can also influence your options. With that said their needs will come first, whether it be allowing dependents or an unaccompanied tour or a stateside PDS.