thedrifter
03-06-08, 09:33 AM
Military mother opposes Iraq war
Thursday, March 06, 2008
The Oregonian
S ince the war in Iraq began, I've written many columns in support of people serving in the military. They are patriots. They make tremendous sacrifices in service to our country.
Most often, my stories have come from the parents of soldiers. I've quoted parents who strongly support the war in Iraq.
I've interviewed more parents whose children have served, been injured or been killed -- and most of those parents are against the war. But they never wanted to say so in the newspaper.
Suzi Sutherland-Martin is the first person who has contacted me and been willing to say, in print, that her son is serving in Iraq and she is opposed to the war.
Suzi's son is an officer in the Marines. She loves him very much; she worries about him constantly. She writes him letters and sends e-mails. She telephones and ships packages.
And every Saturday she heads for the Portland airport, sits at a table in front of a sign that says "Bring the Troops Home" and tries to talk to people about the war.
After months of this work, Suzi has come to a sad conclusion: "I feel the majority of Americans are not interested in the troops or the war," she says.
"I watch all the people who walk by and ignore us, or say they aren't interested.
"The whole mess just doesn't touch them. That is the double whammy of the war for families like mine. You are overwhelmed with concern for your . . . Marine, in my case. And not only don't people seem to care, they don't even seem to be paying attention."
Suzi knows well she could be vilified for speaking out against a war in which her son is fighting. People already have told her she's not being supportive of her son.
"How is it supporting your children to send them to a war we shouldn't have waged, that no one has any idea how to end? Some of them don't have proper equipment. And the public doesn't care."
She knows she will be called anti-military but says she's not.
"My husband and his brother were in the military. Their father was a career Army officer. My father was in the military. My son grew up in a family" with a tradition of military service. After college graduation, he joined the Marines.
When Suzi's son was sent in harm's way, she realized she had no one but her husband to talk to about her fears. "We talked about it obsessively." But outside the family, "I felt so desperately alone. Nobody I knew wanted to talk about the war."
Suzi says she started writing letters to people who wrote commentaries about the war in the newspaper "because they were the only people talking about the war." She felt self-conscious, like she was asking the writers "to be my pen pals."
Then she heard about the Oregon chapter of Military Families Speak Out (www.mfso-oregon.org). She attended a monthly support group in Wilsonville and "was thrilled beyond belief to feel I was not the only person in this situation."
Here were other parents, and a few wives and siblings, who opposed the war their loved ones were fighting.
"We talked about our children, and the depressing things going on for them." One member's son returned from battle with severe post-traumatic stress symptoms. One woman's husband has been sent to Iraq four times.
Many members supported the war at the onset but changed their opinions after hearing what their loved ones had seen. "Their kids don't like it," Suzi says. "They're disillusioned with this war.
"We started talking about what we could do. Write letters, go to demonstrations." To those activities they added the Saturday table at the airport.
Suzi and others pass out pamphlets, bumper stickers, candy. They provide sheets with information about the cost of the war and tell people what they can do to help end it.
"While I'm doing this stuff, I feel like it really matters," Suzi says. "But on the way home, I'm not sure. Because nothing has changed."
She's dismayed that in an election season there's not more discussion about ending the war. She thinks she knows why.
"This is a terrible thing to say, but I think we should have a draft," she says. "I don't like the draft, I don't like war. But I can't think of anything else that would cause people to pay attention" to a war she believes we should not be fighting.
"I think if we had a draft, we would not have had this war." The general population would not have wanted to put its children at risk. College students would have protested more.
But since we are at war, Suzi figured this was a good time, "right before the fifth anniversary, for want of a better word, of the start of the Iraq war" to tell the other side of the story: "The one about parents of soldiers sitting at a table in the airport, trying to remind people there is still a war going on."
Margie Boule: 503-221-8450; marboule@aol.com
Ellie
Thursday, March 06, 2008
The Oregonian
S ince the war in Iraq began, I've written many columns in support of people serving in the military. They are patriots. They make tremendous sacrifices in service to our country.
Most often, my stories have come from the parents of soldiers. I've quoted parents who strongly support the war in Iraq.
I've interviewed more parents whose children have served, been injured or been killed -- and most of those parents are against the war. But they never wanted to say so in the newspaper.
Suzi Sutherland-Martin is the first person who has contacted me and been willing to say, in print, that her son is serving in Iraq and she is opposed to the war.
Suzi's son is an officer in the Marines. She loves him very much; she worries about him constantly. She writes him letters and sends e-mails. She telephones and ships packages.
And every Saturday she heads for the Portland airport, sits at a table in front of a sign that says "Bring the Troops Home" and tries to talk to people about the war.
After months of this work, Suzi has come to a sad conclusion: "I feel the majority of Americans are not interested in the troops or the war," she says.
"I watch all the people who walk by and ignore us, or say they aren't interested.
"The whole mess just doesn't touch them. That is the double whammy of the war for families like mine. You are overwhelmed with concern for your . . . Marine, in my case. And not only don't people seem to care, they don't even seem to be paying attention."
Suzi knows well she could be vilified for speaking out against a war in which her son is fighting. People already have told her she's not being supportive of her son.
"How is it supporting your children to send them to a war we shouldn't have waged, that no one has any idea how to end? Some of them don't have proper equipment. And the public doesn't care."
She knows she will be called anti-military but says she's not.
"My husband and his brother were in the military. Their father was a career Army officer. My father was in the military. My son grew up in a family" with a tradition of military service. After college graduation, he joined the Marines.
When Suzi's son was sent in harm's way, she realized she had no one but her husband to talk to about her fears. "We talked about it obsessively." But outside the family, "I felt so desperately alone. Nobody I knew wanted to talk about the war."
Suzi says she started writing letters to people who wrote commentaries about the war in the newspaper "because they were the only people talking about the war." She felt self-conscious, like she was asking the writers "to be my pen pals."
Then she heard about the Oregon chapter of Military Families Speak Out (www.mfso-oregon.org). She attended a monthly support group in Wilsonville and "was thrilled beyond belief to feel I was not the only person in this situation."
Here were other parents, and a few wives and siblings, who opposed the war their loved ones were fighting.
"We talked about our children, and the depressing things going on for them." One member's son returned from battle with severe post-traumatic stress symptoms. One woman's husband has been sent to Iraq four times.
Many members supported the war at the onset but changed their opinions after hearing what their loved ones had seen. "Their kids don't like it," Suzi says. "They're disillusioned with this war.
"We started talking about what we could do. Write letters, go to demonstrations." To those activities they added the Saturday table at the airport.
Suzi and others pass out pamphlets, bumper stickers, candy. They provide sheets with information about the cost of the war and tell people what they can do to help end it.
"While I'm doing this stuff, I feel like it really matters," Suzi says. "But on the way home, I'm not sure. Because nothing has changed."
She's dismayed that in an election season there's not more discussion about ending the war. She thinks she knows why.
"This is a terrible thing to say, but I think we should have a draft," she says. "I don't like the draft, I don't like war. But I can't think of anything else that would cause people to pay attention" to a war she believes we should not be fighting.
"I think if we had a draft, we would not have had this war." The general population would not have wanted to put its children at risk. College students would have protested more.
But since we are at war, Suzi figured this was a good time, "right before the fifth anniversary, for want of a better word, of the start of the Iraq war" to tell the other side of the story: "The one about parents of soldiers sitting at a table in the airport, trying to remind people there is still a war going on."
Margie Boule: 503-221-8450; marboule@aol.com
Ellie