A question to those Marines who joined later in life with a family

[Erich08]

Hello Marines,

My name is Erich and I am 24 years old, married with a wonderful wife and beautiful 2 1/2 year old daughter. I have been wanting to join the Marine Corps for a while now and my wife and I have discussed it at length and we have decided this is something that we both want to do.

I broke the news to my parents and naturally my mother is freaking out. She has said that this is the worst decision I could make at this point in my life and that I have no idea what I am doing and the time away will be to much for me. I respectfully let her know that I informed them of my decision out of respect and was not seeking their permission as I am a grown adult and can make my own decisions.

With that being said, to my question. And I am sure this question has been asked many times so my apologies in advance if I am kicking a dead horse here. How was the transition from civilian life to a life in the Corps? How was your marriage impacted as well as the relationship with your child/children? I have a Marine friend who said that he and his wife actually grew closer during his time in. Naturally you hear of all the horror stories of failed marriages, etc..

Any advice is much appreciated and thank you in advance Marines.

[Tennessee Top]

It's one thing to imagine how you'll cope with not seeing your family for a year (unaccompanied orders to Okinawa, Japan) but quite another to actually experience it.

Our commandant has made it clear he intends to get us back to our amphibious and expeditionary roots (no more drawn out landlocked wars for us like Irag and Afghanistan). What that means is more time at sea aboard Naval ships and being forward deployed in the Pacific theater with less time sitting at home aboard some base stateside (with your family).

You asked, so I'll tell you my personal experience. My ex lasted till about the halfway point in my 12 month unaccompanied assignment to OKI. When I came back home after being gone for a year, she had already filed for divorce and left with Jody (never saw her again). Fortunately, there were no kids involved. Saw it happen to a lot of my friends but never thought it would happen to me. Occupational hazard. To be fair, I also have friends whose marriages survived. The national average for failed marriages is 50%. Don't know what it is now in the sea services (USMC & USN) but it's higher than that guaranteed. I can understand how some couples like your Marine friend grow closer (you appreciate more what you have with your spouse) but for some others the hardships are just too much to bear or another person enters their life to fill the void as in my case. Not trying to talk you out of anything. If this is what you both want to do go for it and good luck.