View Full Version : Anyone lose family and friends like this?
Bootsondeck
09-26-12, 12:34 PM
Hi, my names Andres, I'm 22 and I have been thinking of joining the Marines since I graduated high school.
The reason I haven't joined is a big one in my opinion. My family will disown me. And I will lose all my friends. The reason for this is because of their religious beliefs. They remain neutral when it comes to war and have taught me since a young age that the military is forbidden for me to join. And that god will kill me for doing so. However I feel like I was meant for it, especially the Marine Corps.
I saw in some of the documentaries that you have to call a next of kin when you arrive at training, but I would have no family to call. I would also lose all my friends because they share the same faith as my family.
I know that this would be a huge sacrifice to join the marines, but I feel like I will only be myself, and do what i was born to do by enlisting.
If anyone has any advice on how to deal with this it would be greatly appreciate.
(Ps, a recruiter coming to my house would mean me being homeless and danger to his safety)
(Pss I wanna be an EOD tech, but I know you can't just enlist as one, and advice on a path to EOD would be great)
Thank you.
Curious as to what Religion or faith that would be ? and some one is going to ask you to fill out your profile better ? :)
Bootsondeck
09-26-12, 12:44 PM
Jehovah's Witness. I was born and raised one, but being a Marine is what I feel I was meant to do. I'll work on my profile lol.
thewookie
09-26-12, 12:45 PM
Andres, as stated previously you must fill out your profile according to the site rules before someone will help you.
This thread is closed until you do -- PM a squad leader, Mod, or Admin to re-open this once you have done that.
Rocky C
09-26-12, 03:00 PM
Profile completed.
Thread re-opened.
Bootsondeck
09-26-12, 03:02 PM
Thank you Rocky.
Rocky C
09-26-12, 03:17 PM
You are most welcome and I hope you find the answers you seek.
Welcome to the Forum.
Seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added onto you (paraphrased)
There lies the answer to your Question.
Bootsondeck
09-26-12, 03:45 PM
Can you explain that really quick?
Tennessee Top
09-26-12, 03:59 PM
Which is your #1 priority:
Your religion?
Your family/friends?
Being a Marine/following your destiny?
You are an adult living in a free country. Grow a pair. Make a choice (we cannot make it for you). Be prepared to live with the consequences either way (don't look back). If you decide to enlist, go see a recruiter ASAP (they do not have to visit your family). The USMC is a young man's game and your clock is ticking. Understand you are joining to go kill people (most likely Muslims for the foreseeable future). Combat Engineers (EOD) serve on the front lines alongside the infantry and occasionally blow people up. If there is a possibility you may become a concientous objector down the road don't embarrass yourself and waste people's time.
Good luck with your decision and let us know how it goes.
Side note: my ex was a Jehova's Witness but she was kicked out of the congregation when she left me for Jody. Holidays and birthdays were great...no gifts!
Bootsondeck
09-26-12, 04:18 PM
My priority is gonna be following my destiny, your right, I need to grow a pair. I'm not asking for anyone to make the choice for me, just wanna know if anyone knows how to deal with sacrificing family ties.
Anyways I guess it's off to the recruiters office tomorrow.
irpat54
09-26-12, 04:38 PM
my brother is Jehovah's Witness, we go round and round about that, he was a Marine before he became one, but and i don't know how to put this nicely, if your family wil disown you for joining, then they are not all that and a bag of chips and would come acrossed as hypacriticle, from what i have learned from my brother that is,,they can kick you out of the assembly but should not kick you out of the family....IMO you would alwasy be welcome at my house,, my Daughter is stationed at 29 palms now, and all Marines are always welcome here,, family have to make reservations...lol
Bootsondeck
09-26-12, 04:45 PM
Lol, maybe I'll take ya up on that offer. I have a few friend who were marines then became JW's, but left cuz they saw the marines as a real brotherhood. They all fought in Vietnam. So hearing their stories growing up gave me the desire to serve.
josephd
09-26-12, 05:01 PM
I think you are also over thinking this and exaggerating it just a bit. I can understand your family not approving of wanting to join and it also being against your religion, but I don't see your parents/family disowning you. They are human and you are their flesh and blood, they will care about you no matter what you do or where you may go.
As for friends.....who cares?...you can and will make new ones in the Corps that will be better than any other long time friends you may have had before.
Ultimately this is your decision and your decision alone. You can't make decisions about your life based on what others may think of you.
And for the EOD thing....why don't you enlist first, get a few years under your belt, become an NCO, and then you can decide where to go from there.
Marine1011
09-26-12, 05:04 PM
boot, you say you family and friends would disown you for joining. Okay. got that.
So all JWs disown you. got that too.
keeping in mind that religion is man's attempt to reach God, JWs believe adhering to their religion, namely the works of being a JW will get them to God.
What's the Bible say about that? All of our works are as filthy rags. Not by works of righteousness... We are saved by faith through Jesus Christ alone.
If you join the Marine Corps, will God disown you? The simple answer is no, but the more complete answer is, do you belong to Him in the first place? Are you saved? Have you placed your faith in Christ? If so, then God will not disown you for being a Marine. If you have not, then you do not belong to Him to begin with.
Bootsondeck
09-26-12, 05:10 PM
Your right Marine 1011. I'm responsible for my own relationship with God. I guess I'll have to deal with not having family around. I know that I will make a new family in the Corps, thanks for your input.
Can you explain that really quick?
Marine 1011 said it pretty well
keeping in mind that religion is man's attempt to reach God, JWs believe adhering to their religion, namely the works of being a JW will get them to God.
What's the Bible say about that? All of our works are as filthy rags. Not by works of righteousness... We are saved by faith through Jesus Christ alone.
If you join the Marine Corps, will God disown you? The simple answer is no, but the more complete answer is, do you belong to Him in the first place? Are you saved? Have you placed your faith in Christ? If so, then God will not disown you for being a Marine. If you have not, then you do not belong to Him to begin with.
Rocky C
09-26-12, 06:16 PM
The Marines Prayer
Almighty Father, whose command is over all and whose love never fails, make me aware of Thy presence and obedient to Thy will. Keep me true to my best self, guarding me against dishonesty in purpose and deed and helping me to live so that I can face my fellow Marines, my loved ones, and Thee without shame or fear. Protect my family.
Give me the will to do the work of a Marine and to accept my share of responsibilities with vigor and enthusiasm. Grant me the courage to be proficient in my daily performance. Keep me loyal and faithful to my superiors and to the duties my Country and the Marine Corps have entrusted to me. Help me to wear my uniform with dignity, and let it remind me daily of the traditions which I must uphold.
If I am inclined to doubt, steady my faith; if I am tempted, make me strong to resist; if I should miss the mark, give me courage to try again.
Guide me with the light of truth and grant me wisdom by which I may understand the answer to my prayer.
You should print this out and give it to Your Family and so called Friends...
Bootsondeck
09-26-12, 08:08 PM
That is such an honest and honorable prayer, one to memorize through training. Thanks again rocky.
thewookie
09-27-12, 08:13 AM
I don't want to get into bashing religions - cause I think they are ALL are a waste of time. But the JW's -- they are a real piece of pooh. My step-father is a cop, and a JW - one day in the line of duty he was forced to shoot a kid who was coming at him and his partner with a car. Totally justified shooting, unfortunately the kid died. The JW church/witness hall completely shunned him, turned their back on him. Bunch of cowards. Hypocrites, ALL of them. Fires me up just thinking about that type of scum.
To the OP -- be a man, do what YOU want to do -- cause those who you think are behind you, just might leave you high and dry when it matters.
You won't find too many Marines that will.
Good luck.
Gunstream
09-27-12, 10:54 AM
I'm not going to get into the religious debate, because it seems like a hornets nest, and I frankly just don't care enough to weigh in. I'll address some of your other concerns though:
1) Two years after you graduate highschool you'll have a completely different set of friends, regardless of whether or not you join the military.
2) If your family will disown you for pursuing what is considered an otherwise very honorable profession, how committed is your family to your happiness? Besides, isn't there some passage about judging not?
3) There are a lot of young men and women who think their parents will disown them for joining the Marine Corps. Then they see the person their Marine has become, and they change their tunes.
4) Your Service Record Book (SRB) has a sheet called the Record of Emergency (RED). It's up to you what you want to list in your RED, and that inclused your Next of Kin (NOK). If your parents really do disown you, it's still your RED. You can list them despite it, and they'll still be notified should something happen to you. If you really don't want anyone notified, you can opt to leave your NOK blank.
Tennessee Top
09-27-12, 12:04 PM
Request permission to hijack the thread for just a minute.
I work at an academic medical center and keep a folder full of copies of The Marine's Prayer in my wall locker. Occasionally, we'll get an active duty or former Marine as an inpatient. I make it a point to pin a copy of the prayer on the corkboard in their room. Don't take credit for it and, most of the time, they have no idea how it got there but seem to appreciate it. It's a small thing but hope it makes them feel better in some way and reinforces the slogan "once a Marine always a Marine".
Rocky C
09-27-12, 01:44 PM
What a wonderful thing to do Top !!!
Semper Fi Brother,
Rocky
Tennessee Top
09-27-12, 03:28 PM
Thank you Rocky!
Most of the time, they're ID'd by a tattoo or the family may bring some pics in and pin on the board.
Can't stand it; :evilgrin: Marine (as in USMC) is ALWAYS capitalized; learn it, do it, remember it! I don't care if you capitalize JW or not!
Bootsondeck
09-27-12, 04:24 PM
Can't stand it; :evilgrin: Marine (as in USMC) is ALWAYS capitalized; learn it, do it, remember it! I don't care if you capitalize JW or not!
Aye Sir!
Marine1011
09-27-12, 05:39 PM
Aye Sir!
And capitalize God, too!
Wasn't there some famous Marine that was a Quaker or a Shaker or something like that; some super anti-war sect?
Oh yeah, SMEDLEY BUTLER!!!
He seemed to overcome the shame of his family.
Bootsondeck
09-28-12, 09:47 AM
I'll look him up. Took the day off from work to talk to a recruiter since I couldn't like I wanted to yesterday.
Tennessee Top
09-28-12, 11:43 AM
How did it go?
ameriken
09-29-12, 11:38 PM
I had a feeling this was regarding JW. A quick story...back in the late 80's, I was visited by a door-knocking JW and deciding to entertain him (or be entertained). In the course of the meeting he told me JW's don't believe in war, don't serve in the military etc. Later when he was leaving, I happened to ask where he worked. His answer? Rocky Flats. If you're not familiar with Rocky Flats, up until 1992 it was a government facility the manufactured the plutonium triggers for nuclear warheads. I guess being antiwar and anti-military is ok unless it means a good government job with benefits and retirement. Lol, go figure!
As for next of kin, just put down your mom or your dad for the records, it's not like someone is going to call them to confirm they really are the next of kin, they'll never know you did that unless something did happen.
There's no right or wrong answer and this is a decision you're going to have to come to on your own, but I'll give you my take on this.
I do know that joining the Corps (or the military in general) has created similar friction within a family and loved ones. But you're an adult and you are allowed to make your own choices and decisions and carry your own life forward. If they see their beliefs about the military as being more important than you as a person and they decide to disown you, that is their choice. They have the choice to accept you for who you are, or not.
I'm thinking too that if you give in now, they could end up doing the same thing threatening you with every decision you make from this point forward....who to marry, where to live, what friends you can and cannot have, etc. I'm not saying that you should intentionally do something for the sake of creating this friction, but on the other hand this really is your life now. Something tells me though, if they really do love you after you've made up your mind and have been serving, I think they'll come around.
You said "I know that this would be a huge sacrifice to join the marines, but I feel like I will only be myself, and do what i was born to do by enlisting". If that is true, then IMO, do it. You don't want to look back 40 or 50 years from now and regret a decision because you did what someone else wanted you to do. It's also possible you'll join the Corps and hate every second of it, but it least it's your own life and decision. I would suggest really doing some homework and hearing from other Marines, past and current, as to what life is like in the Corps. While there is honor and integrity in being a Marine, day to day life can go against reason and wear on some. Expressions like 'there's the right way and the Marine Corps way', 'woke up at oh-dark-thirty' and 'hurry up and wait', and 'fck-fck games', and other expressions give a little glimpse of what life can be like in Corps. For example when going on on operation they'll get you up at 0300 to be ready in full gear for chow by 0330 so you can fall in with your company at 0400 and then sit on your ass in the hot sun until 1500 hours when the trucks finally arrive to pick up your unit. So you really want to make sure this is something you want to do and that it really will be worth the sacrifice.
As for the recruiter, be open and honest about what is happening with your family and friends. The recruiter does not have to come to your home.
Good luck!
Marine1011
10-01-12, 01:26 PM
Wasn't there some famous Marine that was a Quaker or a Shaker or something like that; some super anti-war sect?
Oh yeah, SMEDLEY BUTLER!!!
He seemed to overcome the shame of his family.
And what about the pacifist who claimed a draft exemption as a conscientious objector, then killed 29 Germans, including 6 with a sidearm, and took 132 prisoners. Sgt York.
And what about the pacifist who claimed a draft exemption as a conscientious objector, then killed 29 Germans, including 6 with a sidearm, and took 132 prisoners. Sgt York.
Fundamentalist (hillbilly) Baptist and a soldier;; really kind of apples and oranges! LOL!
Them hillbilly Baptists apt to go postal at any given time! (I be married to one, I know)