HEad Call

[SlingerDun]

Theres alot of merit in learning to hold back and picking the right time to request a head call if your only choices are fouling yourself or getting chewed and thrashed for asking. Sure you'll burn most everything you eat as fuel with few solid waste emissions, mostly gas. If a guys feeling bound up in the field after a few days or more without a bowel movement a canteen cup of hot greasy french onion soup (if available) is enough to send a guy into the brush with an e-tool. I've been told recruits now drink much more water and i could imagine having to urinate while fighting to stay awake in a hot boring classroom after lunch or drilling and standing at parade rest on the grinder for what seems like hours. Yeah that would suck, i got no answers.

--->Dave

[killerinstinct]

When you request to go to the head, do the D.I's usually let you go? Or do they wait until you **** your pants?

oh and i forgot you have to ask like this..


-Recruit smuckatellie requests permission to speak to drill instructor Sgt Smith SIR!!


Recruit smuckatellie requests permission to make a head call SIR!!! or This recruit needs to make a head call sir!!

one of those last ones would work. But make sure to ask to speak to him correctly and if hes yoru senior etc...

[jpal3451]

Well heres how it went for me --


Kill hats NEVER spoke to you. If you tried to ask to go to the head, even properly, they would scream at you and say "I DONT CARE" or STFU or something ...... You generally had to ask the SR DI, who 9/10 times let you go unless something important was going on. But you will see a lot of people **** their pants and a few will **** the bed. I saw 3 people **** their pants as well.

[sparkie]

Nice thread....Thanks for the morning read.

[thewookie]

To this day I can hold it with the best of them. My bodily functions that is. You should prepare yourself to not go #2 until after TAPS, how you prepare for that I dunno, but you won't be taking any nice comfy poops with the funny section of the newspaper.

[Chumley]

At least two separate times I remember a private ****ing himself while we were drilling (nope, NOT me). Rather than request permission or break ranks during drill / rifle practice they just ****ed themselves and kept on going. Once was in the squadbay, and the DI's flipped when the puddle was discovered. If any poolee doesn't understand why one might choose to **** themselves instead of simply requesting permission to go properly, the answer is that the result is pretty much the same but one option includes less pain, so you might as well get better at drilling.

[thewookie]

We had a guy, recruit Williams, he'll probably kill me if he ever finds this but, it's funny. We came back from the chow hall and we were in the squad bay preparing for an alpha inspection. So our cami trousers were folded on our racks, and the usual DI chaos was going on all around us as we got dressed. One DI, Sgt. Baker happened to see a bulge coming out of recruit William's cami trousers and decided to investigate. My rack was next to Williams (Vernazzaro,) and a long story short, he found an apple in Williams trousers that he had "stolen" from the chow hall. Of course he made a big DI scene and he got Williams up on the quarterdeck. He wore him out for a long, long, long time. And at some point I remember glancing up there and seeing this puddle forming below Williams crotch area as he was doing push-ups. Man, that was funny. DI Sgt. Baker went off, it was hysterical but not for Williams!

[Zulu 36]

When I went through in 1971, the DIs generally allowed quick head calls after chow (to tinkle only) during teeth brushing time. In which order you did it was up to you.

We also had a specific way to ask. It had to ALWAYS be an Emergency Head Call. Nothing less would do. Then the DI, when giving permission, would add "First, maggot, two laps around my squad bay, Code 3." And the private would take off making a siren sound for two laps then into the head.

It was always somewhat amusing, except when it was you doing the laps.

[thewookie]

I love it! AND, ALWAYS an EMERGENCY HEADCALL, no other form is allowed so don't bother!

[maverickmarine]

See I remember in 3rd phase that being priority number one following mail call and at the beginning of that one hour of time you had before lights out to get everything squared away would be to run to the ****ters. We had I believe two or three and you would get your mail and then as soon as you were free you dash in there and hope to get a ****ter. You would sit there reading your letters and talking with your buddies. Obviously, with 50-60 other recruites you didn't take all freakin' day but it was just another funny part of it.

[thewookie]

I could go on and on about boot camp. We had this kid Shawgo, they called him Sha-lay-go. Any way, he was constipated and one morning he went to sick bay. He was a limp dick, fat body, and all the bad things to be. If he reads this and complains I'll find him and beat him, just kidding! So he comes back from sick call later in the morning as the platoon is drilling outside. He comes over to the DI Sgt. Wallace who's drilling us and gives him a big bottle of Metamucil, and DI Sgt. Wallace stops drilling us and proceeds to read the instructions out loud, "take 1 teaspoon per day until relieved," or something like that. So he tells Shawgo to open his canteen, and then he opens the Metamucil bottle and tells Shawgo to tilt his head back and open wide! I swear he poured half the bottle of that stuff in his mouth, if you've ever seen the bottle then you'd **** yourself. And then he had him wash it down with a canteen of water. So we go about our day, drilling, going to the pit, drilling, going to the pit, drilling,,,. And then at the barracks after some evening chow, after we marched back and all of us had seen Shawgo turn different shades of red and purple throughout the day. The DI's finally called Shawgo up in front of the platoon. (All day they had been f-in with him, all day) And so they asked him if he had to go #2, and of course he yelled Sir YES Sir! So they had him run up to the 3rd floor of the barracks yelling "Man I gotta ****" three or four times until they finally let him actually enter the barracks and do his thing. He didn't make it.

[Zulu 36]

He wasn't constipated anymore, was he?

Sh*t happens.

[drewster915]

Save all Head calls for late nite, while i was in B.C. had a recruit kept asking to use the head during class time..DI got mad told us who ever ask to go again we would all pay for it take into account this was after a hydration session (2-3 reps of 2 canteens filled, drank, held over your head to prove that you drank them) well nobody asked again but there was about 4 peabody's...Long story short,,,we all paid for it anyways!!!
keep you legs crossed, or tie a knot in it....

[sparkie]

I have to think,, Those Marines on the beach at Iwo, Didn't have time for a head call.

[BR34]

Just make sure to tell the D.I. it's an "emergency". This should be fun for him and your fellow recruits.