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10-07-10, 07:53 PM #31
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10-07-10, 08:43 PM #32
Originally Posted by Zumbii
ROFL.... wow that is so wrong
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10-08-10, 11:35 AM #33
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10-08-10, 12:10 PM #34
Thanks zumbii, I feel like a stoner now.
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10-08-10, 12:12 PM #35
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10-08-10, 12:32 PM #36That was sooo effing sick. Originally Posted by the802
Laughed so hard
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10-08-10, 01:02 PM #37
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10-08-10, 01:17 PM #38
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10-08-10, 02:01 PM #39
As a group of Marine Recruits stood in formation at Boot Camp, the Drill Instructer said, "All right! All you idiots fall out."
As the rest of the squad wandered away, one Recruit remained at attention.
The Drill Instructor walked over until he was eye-to-eye with him, and then raised a single eyebrow. The Recruit smiled and said, "Sure was a lot of 'em, huh, sir?"
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10-08-10, 02:10 PM #40
A Marine dies in combat and wakes up to find he is in hell. He's really depressed as he stands in the processing line waiting to talk to an admittance counselor. He thinks to himself I know I lead a wild life but, Hell, I'm a Marine. We're expected to live wild lives. I wasn't that bad. I never thought it would come to this. "
Looking up he sees that it is his turn to be processed into hell. With fear and heavy heart, he walks up to the counselor.
Counselor: What's the problem, you look depressed?
Marine: Well, what do you think? I'm in hell.
Counselor: Hell's not so bad, We actually have a lot of fun. Do you like to drink?
Marine: Of course I do. I'm a Marine.
Counselor: Well then, you are going to love Mondays, On Mondays we drink up a storm. You can have whiskey, rum, tequila, beer, whatever you want and as much you want. We party all night long. You'll love Mondays. Do you smoke?
Marine: Yes, as a matter of fact I do.
Counselor: You are going to love Tuesdays. Tuesday is smoke day. You get to smoke the finest cigars and best cigarettes available anywhere. And you smoke to your heart's desire without worrying about cancer because you are already dead! Is that great or what? You are going to love Tuesdays.
Do you like to fight?
Marine: Of course I do. I'm a Marine!
Counselor: You are going to love Wednesdays. That's Fighting Day. We challenge each other to fights to see who's the toughest in Hell. You don't have to worry about getting hurt or killed, because you're already dead.You are going to love Wednesdays. Do you gamble?
Marine: Show me a Marine who doesn't!
Counselor: You are going to love Thursdays, Because we gamble all day and night. Black jack, craps, poker, slots, horse races, everything! you are going to love Thursdays. Are you gay?
Marine: Of course, not! I'm a Marine!
Counselor: Oh (grimaces) , you're going to hate Fridays.
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10-08-10, 03:37 PM #41If that ever happens I... I kind of wanna do that. Originally Posted by shadox
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10-08-10, 03:52 PM #42
This gave me a good laugh
http://bertroche.blogspot.com/2009/0...062909_02.html
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10-08-10, 05:08 PM #43haha so Fing funny Originally Posted by Zumbii
"this recruit has reached the top of the mountain sir"
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10-11-10, 12:53 PM #44
Recruit Gone AWOL
As the sun rose over Parris Island, the senior drill instructor realized that one of his recruits had gone AWOL. A search party was dispatched immediately. After a few hours the recruit was discovered hiding in some bushes. He was sent back to the base and promptly escorted to the drill instructor's office. The instructor asked the young recruit, "Why did you go AWOL?"
The recruit replied, "My first day here you issued me a comb, and then proceeded to cut my hair off. The second day you issued me a toothbrush, and sent me to the dentist, who proceeded to pull all my teeth. The third day you issued me a jock strap, and I wasn't about to stick around and find out what would follow that SIR."
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10-11-10, 01:03 PM #45
The Marine Drill Instructor was inspecting the platoon. He stopped in front of one of the Rectruits and asked, "Where are you from Maggot?"
" Iowa City, Iowa," the young Recruit barked.
He nodded and moved on. The Drill Instructor next stopped in front of a very young looking Recruit. The Gunny smiled and looked down at him,
"When is your birthday Maggot?"
" May 5th sir," the young Recruit barked.
"What year son?"
The young Recruit looked flustered and then replied, "Every year sir."
The Drill Instructor quit smiling, brought himself back to attention and continued down the line.
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Ghost Of Iwo Jima
04-04-24, 11:35 PM in Open Squad Bay