They can't forget 'forgotten war'

Tuesday, May 19th 2009, 4:00 AM

The nation's Defense Secretary, Robert Gates, was saying last week that fresh eyes were needed on the war in Afghanistan, that a new approach is necessary in the intractable conflict there because, after more than seven years, the Taliban is still strong and remains entrenched in the rugged mountains where so many young Americans have died.

So Gates appointed a new general and bounced the old one during his announcement at the Pentagon, on a beautiful May day.

His words immediately brought to mind a bleak, bone-chilling morning early last January, when a Bronx family sat together mourning their young Marine, Alberto Francesconi, who was killed in the restive Helmand province in Afghanistan.

Francesconi's brother, Robert Rivera, was red-eyed and dazed. He stood among the Christmas decorations and dozens of photos of his little brother to graciously talk to reporters about Francesconi.

And one thing he said should have spurred the Pentagon to change course a long time ago.

Francesconi had seen action in Iraq for six months in 2007, as a sniper. On Veterans Day 2008, he was deployed to Afghanistan.

"He said it was three times worse than Iraq," said Rivera, shaking his head.

"It's worse there than people are talking about."

Fifty-two members of the military have died there since Francesconi.

Since Operation Enduring Freedom - the euphemism for the war in Afghanistan - began shortly after the 9/11 attacks, 683 U.S. military personnel have died there.

The massive casualties in Iraq overshadowed the "forgotten war."

But President Obama said two months ago that there would be a major overhaul of U.S. strategy in Afghanistan. Troop levels are expected to surpass 60,000.

One can't help but wonder why it took so long to address the situation in Afghanistan, when the people fighting there, all the way down to lowly privates, saw the different level of ferocity.

Francesconi's family had gathered at their home in Fordham to ring in 2009. There was a bright Christmas tree, and festive lights all around the cozy apartment.

Rivera said that at about 11 p.m. - which was 9:30 a.m. Jan. 1 in Afghanistan - one of his brother's fellow Marines called from the battlefield to tell them he had died.

"The first to find out was my mother and father," Rivera said then. "I tried to settle her down. She kept saying the only way to confirm it is if they come to the door."

Just minutes before midnight, they did, confirming that Francesconi had been blown up, becoming the nation's first casualty in Afghanistan in 2009.

In the days that followed, relatives came from other states to grieve with the family in that small apartment, pointing to Francesconi in the photos covering the wall. He was in dress uniform as a stonefaced Marine lance corporal; a crawling, curly-haired baby; a graduate; a handsome groom with his wife, Cynthia, and a teenager at Orchard Beach.

His mother, Minerva Negron, couldn't stop crying. His father, Alberto Sr., was pale and could barely speak. He said he had a bad heart.

"I wish I'd die," he said. "He was my baby. He was 21."

Francesconi grew up in a tough area of the Bronx, but always wanted a better life.

To pursue his dream of becoming a pilot, Francesconi went to Aviation High School in Queens, then joined the Marine Corps, and was assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 8th Marine Regiment, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, out of Camp Lejeune in North Carolina.

Francesconi exuded confidence during his first tour in Iraq, said Rivera.

But when he heard he was to go to Afghanistan, the family had a sense of fear.

"Albert spoke with some of the guys who came back from there, and they said it was worse than Iraq. But I told him, 'Take that negative seed out of your brain and think positive.'"

And before Francesconi shipped out to Afghanistan, he told his brother that if he should be killed, he wanted to be buried next to his grandmother at St. Raymond's Cemetery.

He was.

There will be a Mass there on Memorial Day, at 11 a.m. Prayers will be said for those buried there too young, who died in Afghanistan, and Iraq, and France, and the South Pacific, and Korea and Vietnam.

Wherever you might be that day, stop and think of Francesconi. Think of all of them.

poshaughnessy@nydailynews.com

Ellie