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Thread: Cuss Word Alternatives
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01-29-09, 08:26 AM #1
Cuss Word Alternatives
Does anyone have any good cuss word alternatives? My oldest son is starting to pick up on my so I am looking for new ones.
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01-29-09, 08:28 AM #2
I see this thread getting lively, CPL. Which ones are you using?
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01-29-09, 08:43 AM #3
I'm lucky enough that my oldest ( 6 ) has never even thought about cussing ( around me at least ). But if he did I'd make him build a bridge till he forgot all them words ( barney style: build a bridge = planks ).
On the flip side, I'm in the hospital right now, just had another baby boy yesterday, so maybe I should worry about him potentially having this problem...
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01-29-09, 08:45 AM #4
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01-29-09, 08:48 AM #5
I googled this
Oh my fat monkey"
"Sugar biscuits!"
"Cheese puff!"
"Kitty biscuits!"
"Apple bottom jeans!"
"Snot nose licker, we're gonna die"
"Ice crystals!"
"Boom box, I'm dead."
"Kitten whisker! NOOO!"
"I'd like to stress how bull cookie this is."
"Baby spit up!"
"Sugar Crystals!"
"Son of a biscuit!"
"Oh my fly swatter!"
"Mother of a walrus, they're everywhere!"
"son of a tree horse"
"son of a raccoon"
"baby doll"
"I'm gonna swallow you like a dinosaur"
"son of a seahorse, what the heck?"
"son of a biscuit on a saturday afternoon!"
"I have boots and I have fur""
"Shizzle rat"
"Mother of a pumpkin"
So far I'm using:
God Bless America
Shut The Front Door
Son of a Mother Trucker
Fudge Berries
Fark
Frikking
Fragdaggle
Snit
Dargondable
Urgh
Argh
Urgalurga
Fockdock
Great God In The Foothills
Jumped Up Jeebies
Blangdang
Snagglefraggle
Geez Terwilligers
Gul Durnit
Dag Nabit
Mothersmucker
Fiddlesniddle
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01-29-09, 09:04 AM #6
Jibberjabber
Hornswaggle
Sweet Merciful Baby Jesus!
Oh My Golly Gee Whiz!
Ooooooooh buttersquash
Butternuts!
Cornnuts!
Nachos and Cheese!
bricka-bracka-razza-frazzin
Oh poo on a stick.
Your face!
Your mother's face!
Your mother makes flat bacon! (Long story)
Cause you're a stinkin kook!
Daggone baby spittle!
And the horse you rode in on!
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01-29-09, 09:58 AM #7
Well let see the most common ones I use.
mofracky
dang nabit
mother fluffy pants
friggin hockey sticks
problem is he has started to repeat them at school and even though they are not bad his teacher still knows what the point behind them are so I got talked to about it.
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01-29-09, 10:00 AM #8
Your mother makes flat bacon! (Long story)
I got time lets here the story.
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01-29-09, 10:11 AM #9
Frak!
The wife and I have a running joke involving "your mother" ie, "I'm going to the store." "Your mother's going to the store." This of course is said in a snotty, little voice.
This stems from a running joke my brother and a friend have involving "your face". This was all brought about by us having terrible, malevolent senses of humor. Another far longer story.
I was planning to put some burgers on the griddle for dinner one day. The wife says she wants bacon cheese burgers cause we wanted to be nasty that day. I had it in my head to use another griddle wrapped in foil as a bacon press and did so.
She was like, WTF are you doing? I said I was making flat bacon. She said "Who cares? We're not a restaurant."
I asked what the problem was with my making flat bacon. The exhaust fan was in my ear and her response of "Who makes flat bacon?" turned into "Your mother makes flat bacon."
I went ballistic and she had the giggles when I explained to her why I just gave her the evil death stare. Then we laughed because we're terrible people and our unborn son is going to be the devil himself apparently.
That's what you get for having enough time to hear the story.
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01-29-09, 10:25 AM #10
If he's going go to cuss, encourage him to learn them in German or French. Maybe he'll end up liking other languages.
Your mother swears in German!
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01-29-09, 10:26 AM #11
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01-29-09, 10:31 AM #12
freakin A
frikkin A
fuzzbottom
fuzznuts!!!
fudge
yuck fou
chuck you farley
aw sheet
rum dummy
shoz bot
doody head
heck yeah
frik it
aw..... duck water
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01-29-09, 11:36 AM #13
So in my baseball program we use words that are similar, but don't sound completely ridiculous...
instead of the f-word, fetchin...( what the fetch? are you fetchin me?)
" " s-word, shippin...( ship!! are you fetchin shippin me? you piece of ship.)
instead of the b-word, beach...( beach!! you son of a beach!)
or we just don't finish the word...( Mother fuhhh!)
feel free to mix it up though...like ( son of a ship! what the beach?!?)
hope this helps...
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01-29-09, 12:22 PM #14
Good luck. They learn all the real ones anyway.
My 16-year daughter swears like a Marine, but my 10-year old son I have never heard swear (except to quote his sister when he's ratting her out). So I know he knows them.
My 24-year old daughter can swear all she wants to now.
Oh, and as their mother is Cuban, they all know how to swear in Spanish too.
But, I've got the drop on them in a few words in Japanese and Vietnamese.
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01-29-09, 12:23 PM #15
SNATCHURLY
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