Bring peace to the desert
John Weeks, Staff Writer
San Bernardino County Sun
Posted:01/20/2009 11:32:20 PM PST

Barack Obama becomes commander-in-chief of a nation at war. American troops are battling insurgents in Iraq. Our troops are pursuing terrorist factions in Afghanistan. And here at home, the U.S. Marines are skirmishing with off-roaders in San Bernardino County.

Will there ever be peace in this world?

The Twentynine Palms Marine Corps Air Ground Combat Center, which already is the nation's largest Marine training base, wants to expand its operations into the Johnson Valley Off Highway Vehicle Area, a 188,000-acre parcel of land south of Barstow and east of Victorville.

The military wants to use the land for stepped-up live-fire training and maneuver exercises. It has petitioned the federal Bureau of Land Management to remove the land from public use and reallocate it for use by the Marines. Local officials, while supportive of military needs, say that the loss of public lands will adversely affect the region's economy.

The Marines are holding public meetings and accepting public comment until Jan. 31.

I know that it is our new president who has the ultimate say-so when it comes to military matters, but I consider it within my rights, as future Emperor of the Inland Empire, to make a simple suggestion.

I say, why must we decide in favor of either party? I think we can craft a win-win solution that accommodates both sides.

I say the desert is big enough for the Marines and the dirt bikers both. They can co-exist. They can share and share alike.

Here's how it will work. Instead of using real ammo in their training exercises, the Marines will shoot paint- balls. And their maneuvers will consist of scouting, tracking and firing upon the off-roaders.

To make the exercises more meaningful, the bikers and ATVers also will be commissioned to carry paintball weapons, and they will be allowed to engage the Marines and return fire.

For the Marines it will be valuable practice. For the off-roaders it will be a great adventure. They will be more than happy to provide this valuable civilian service free of charge.

Heck, at the end of the day, the dirt bikers might even invite the Marines over to their campgrounds for barbecue and brews.

Call it a bivouac, or call it a tailgate party. Whatever you call it, it sure beats military rations in the mess hall.

You can see how the off-roaders and the soldiers both are going to love this new arrangement. The bikers and ATVers will love it because the paintball wars will add excitement to their weekends. The Marines will love it because it will liven up their training exercises.

They might even be able to spot new talent and attract new enlistments from the ranks of the off-roaders. This could turn out to be a powerful new recruiting tool.

In fact, the military may want to consider a new ad campaign with a new slogan:

"The Marines Are Looking for a Few Good Dirt Bikers."

Ellie