Chuckles of the Day... - Page 1271
  1. #19051

  2. #19052
    A golfer accidentally overturned hiscart.

    Elizabeth, a "beautiful" real golfer who lived in a villa on the
    golf course heard the noise and yelled over to him.

    "Hey, are you okay, what's your
    name?"
    "Willis," he replied.

    "Willis forget your troubles. Come to my villa,
    rest up and I'll help you get the cart up later."

    "That's mighty nice of you," Willis answered,
    "but I don't think my wife would like it."

    "Aw come on," Elizabeth insisted
    .






    She was very pretty and persuasive.






    "Well okay," Willis finally agreed,
    And added, "but my wife won't like it."

    After a hearty drink AND sexy driving and putting lessons, Willis thanked his host.
    "I feel a lot better now, but I know my wife is going to be real upset."

    "Don't be foolish!” Elizabeth said with a smile , she wont know anything. By the way, where is she?"

    "Under the cart!"




















































































  3. #19053
    June 14, 2012—SURVIVOR IN TEXAS—TEXAS STYLE. Due to the popularity of the "Survivor" TV program, Texas is planning to do one entitled: Survivor, Texas-style." The 8 contestants will all start in Dallas. They will go to Waco, Austin and San Antonio. Then over to Houston and down to Brownsville. Then they will proceed up to Del Rio, El Paso, Odessa, Midland, Lubbock and Amarillo. From there they will go to Abilene and Fort Worth, and finally, back to Dallas. Each will be driving a pink Prius with bumper stickers that read:


    • I'M A DEMOCRAT
    • AMNESTY FOR ILLEGALS
    • I LOVE THE DIXIE CHICKS
    • BOYCOTT BEEF
    • I VOTED FOR OBAMA
    • ILLEGALS NEED THE RIGHT TO VOTE
    • SAM HOUSTON FAVORED GAY MARRIAGE
    • I'M HERE TO CONFISCATE YOUR GUNS

    The first contestant to make it back to Dallas alive is the SURViVOR.
    GOD BLESS TEXAS


  4. #19054

  5. #19055

  6. #19056

  7. #19057

  8. #19058
    The doctor had sex with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he just couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal of his patient were overwhelming.





    But every once in a while he'd hear an internal, reassuring voice in his head that said: "Don't worry about it. You aren't the first medical practitioner to have sex with one of his patients and you won't be the last


    And you're single. Just let it go."





    But, invariably, another voice in his head would bring him back to reality, whispering:





    "You're a veterinarian, you sick bastard ."






  9. #19059

  10. #19060

  11. #19061
    loved it!


  12. #19062

  13. #19063

  14. #19064
    I saw her standing there and I told her she had three beautiful children...........My mistake!!!!
    She didn't have to get upset and threaten me with a Holy Jihad!

    It was an honest mistake....

    Click image for larger version

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  15. #19065

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