Seeing your child while in the fleet
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  1. #1

    Seeing your child while in the fleet

    Hello everyone, hopefully this is the right place to ask this question, sorry if it's not, I'm brand new to the whole forum thing.

    I'm in the process of divorce and leaving for boot camp October 9th. The divorce isn't what I'm worried about. I have a three year old son who is absolutely my entire world and undertaking the challenge of becoming a Marine possibly isn't the best step towards spending time with my son, but I've dreamt of serving my country since I was 11. I was told I wasn't able to join a couple years back and it crushed me. Then out of the blue I got a call from my recruiter. It seemed like a sign from God, and I believe if I don't give it a shot I'll regret it for the rest of my life. Now that you have at least a little backstory of what this means to me, my question is this: After MOS school when I get stationed, would I be able to have him for a certain amount of time every month? I know the base has day cares so I was hoping I could keep him for two weeks or so at a time. Im active duty and my MOS is avionics. It's going to be incredibly tough on me being away from him for boot camp and I've come to terms that I won't see him during deployments. I'm looking for some sort of hope that I don't have to be a "holiday Dad" as mine was. To be clear, his Mom is on board and supports me in my journey and we get along just fine. She knows what kind of father I am and isn't worried in the slightest. Thanks for taking the time to read. I appreciate all the honesty in your answers even if I may not like them.

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  2. #2
    a lot will depend on your MOS and C.O at the base and their policy, each base Commander is different, most of the time they try to make accommodations for family.

    But if you want your child for a week or two you will have to have off-base housing and that also is up to the camp commander and your unit C. O. if you will be allowed to have your own off-base housing, when I was in it wasn't too easy for such, but times change so it might be easier to get permission to rent a place off base

  3. #3
    Too many variables other than to say it's possible but time with him every month probably a stretch. Don't know where you live but say he's on the East coast with his mom and your PDS is on the west coast. How's he going to travel back-n-forth and is his mom traveling with him each time (wouldn't want a 3 year-old traveling alone). Could you afford the travel expenses, plus lodging at your PDS, for both of them on a regular basis. What if your PDS is overseas like Japan or HI? Overseas assignments are normally for 2 years.

    Yes, bases do have daycare but what happens when the daycare closes but you can't get off work in time to pick him up? What if you're scheduled for duty that day and can't leave? You can't count on a normal 8-5 Mon thru Friday weekends/holidays off work schedule in avionics. Goal in any aviation squadron is to have as many planes flying as possible. If that means putting in 10 hour days on the flight line, then you'll put in 10 hour days.

    Bottom line. Spending time with your son is more likely if you're located close to him. The further apart you are, the least likely it is to happen. Don't know how long avionics school is but it's most likely in Pensacola, FL. Bootcamp is 13 weeks, Marine Combat Training (MCT) after is 29 days, then avionics school. Students at any formal school have a lot of restrictions, designed that way to keep them out of trouble as well as focused on why they're there. You won't see your son while in bootcamp or MCT obviously. MOS school would probably be a stretch.

    Good luck.

  4. #4
    it all depends on your custody agreement, if you have a high enough percentage of custody you may rate BAH with dependents if not you will be living in the barracks unless you want to fork over your child support and rent money. The Marine Corps in all honesty does not care about your kid if you don't have a certain amount of custodial rights so you might want to make sure the agreement is like half to full on your end.

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