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  1. #1
    Marine Free Member thegimprider's Avatar
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    Drinking Song

    Not too many famous songs or stories written about tea but that old demon rum and family of strong drink has inspired quite a list.
    Here I offer my latest Blues

    Hard Times HardDrinks


    I choose a harddrink when hard times cover my head
    I choose a harddrink when hard times cover my head
    Whiskey makes asidewalk softer than a feather bed


    Well I can't hold myliquor so I let the liquor hold me
    No I can't hold myliquor so I let the liquor hold me
    I'm sleeping in thebushes underneath a down town tree


    I used to be a cleancut high and tight US Marine
    I used to be a cleancut high and tight US Marine
    Till some fat copstarted pushing I earned myself a felony


    They say, “youwon't find answers in the bottom of a bottle”
    Son “you won'tfind answers in the bottom of a bottle”
    When you hit bottomthe bottle is the answers motto


    I drink the cheapestvodka but I prefer my single malt neat
    I drink the cheapestvodka but I prefer a single malt neat
    Booze can turn analleyway into a penthouse suite


    I'm a bottle fedbaby
    Pulled many corks inmy time
    I'm a bottle fedbaby
    Milk of amnesiakeeps the blues away
    I start to cry whenthe tap runs dry


    Don't you know yourliver gonna take a beating today
    Yes it looks likeyour liver gonna take a beating today
    As I stand here atthe discount liquor store line to pay


    Watch the pain growsmaller like a train leaving the station
    How the pain getssmaller like a train that left the station
    Wake up as thepolice raid shows me a grateful nation


    Veteran's have gotthe right to choose their medication
    Veterans still havea right to choose their medication
    Alcohols been testedtrue for many generations


    How many people diefrom your pill prescriptions
    How many people diefrom your pill prescriptions
    Booze has got themarket so go and have a big conniption


    By Douglas Coulter
    April 2016

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  2. #2
    Sounds like you've flown that airline.


  3. #3
    Natalie P
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    I like to listen to Jazz music when I have a glass of white wine.


  4. #4
    Marine Free Member thegimprider's Avatar
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    flown and crashed


  5. #5
    Marine Free Member thegimprider's Avatar
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    another mans poison

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  6. #6
    Marine Free Member thegimprider's Avatar
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    Post Romantic Stress Syndrome

    Post Romantic Stress Syndrome

    I’ve a story that needs telling be it whispering or yelling
    To every young man leaving home
    True love is an infection so be sure to wear protection
    And medicate your heart to stone
    All those ravings of the poet take their rosy lines and stow-it
    Or in the end you’ll sadly moan
    As Sampson was Delilah’s slave a poster boy for Burma shave
    His only exit was the grave He died of post romantic stress syndrome
    Well girls read hot romances and meet simple boys at dances
    Just like a spider traps some fly
    With both her eyelids winking his upper brain stops thinking
    And blindly he prepares to die
    When her lethal plans grow clear he may try to run in fear
    To drag him back she merely to cries
    The praying mantis male is dead while mating she bites off his head
    A fact of life you may have read its death by post romantic stress syndrome
    Several drams of Lagovulin might leave a good man drooling
    But he sleeps it off in just one day
    While woman’s touch is subtle mans thinking skill get muddled
    The damage never goes away
    Once captured by her smile she drags her victim down the aisle
    To demand a ransom he can’t pay
    When she reaches menopause she’ll shred a guy without a cause
    Ripped open by her sharpened claws to bleed with post romantic stress syndrome
    Old Laphroig and I may wrestle underneath a railroad trestle
    And wake up in some small town jail
    With Aardbeg I could play until the cops lock me away
    In a dungeon where my skin grows pale
    But prison walls do not compare to a heart that’s been stripped bare
    By promises of love that fail
    Like Romeo and Juliet the only guarantee’s regret
    A dagger pays the finial debt its poison post romantic stress syndrome
    I was a passionate romantic until she left me a frantic
    Broken down abandoned claim
    True love and devotion they are mythical emotions
    A recipe for endless pain
    I find it far less risky to drink single malted whisky
    Than let some lady light my flame
    After all the flames extinguished it is only hurt they bring us
    We can always be distinguished by scars of post romantic stress syndrome


  7. #7
    Learned "The Big F-ng Wheel" while stationed at MCRD San Diego and coming back from a night of debauchery in T-Town.

    There was an old sailor before he died.
    I'll never know if the old bastid lied.
    He had a wife with a t**t so wide
    That she could never be satisfied.

    So they devised for him a big F'ing wheel
    Attached to it was a big P***k of steel
    two balls of brass, they filled with cream
    And the whole damned contraption was run by steam.

    And around and and around went the bit F'ing wheel.
    In and out went the big P***k of steel
    Until at last the maid she cried.
    Enough. Enough. I'm satisfied.

    But this was where the viper bit.
    Ther was no way of stopping it.
    It tore the maid from tw*t to t*t
    And the whole contraption blew up in shirt

    And around and and around went the bit F'ing wheel.
    In and out went the big P***k of steel
    Until at last the maid she cried.
    Enough. Enough. I'm satisfied.


  8. #8

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