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How To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity in retirement.
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars...watch 'em Slow Down!
2. On all...
03-03-14, 11:26 AM
Coffee came out my nose...
A man escapes from a prison where he’s been locked up for 15 years.
He breaks into a house and inside, he finds a young couple in bed.
He ties him to a chair. While tying the wife to the bed,...
A young woman was taking golf lessons and had just started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting.
Her pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse for...
My ex wife came bragging to me about her hot new boyfriend and how she invited him for a romantic dinner and evening at her house.
But I'm a good guy who doesn't hold grudges and I really wanted...
There's always a long line at the unemployment office. One morning I got there just as the office opened at 8 to pick up my check. What a frigging line! So I wait. And wait. 9:00 passes. Then 10. The...
So me and my lady went out to the bar to celebrate. Figured we'd take in a few drinks, play some foozball, and dance when the live band arrived.
When we got there we were not welcomed very well....
Sex has been a bit dull lately, so the wife suggested I get myself one of those penis enlargers .......
so I did....
she's 21 and her name's Sue
A guy goes in an adult store and asks for an inflatable doll.
Guy behind the counter says, "Male or female?"
Customer says, "Female"...
Counter guy asks, "Black or white?"
The Federal Reserve? ;)
I loved it when the interviewer asked "Where were you when you didn't learn American history"
"In grade school"
02-19-14, 12:15 PM
Now we're ready for ya!
Jimmy Kimmel show...liewitness news: interviewing people about the recent death of FDR.
Are people really this stupid?
If you feel the Marines are a better fit, go with what you want to do. Kudos to your uncle for wanting you to join the military, but follow your own heart and mind. If you make a wrong decision it's...
02-16-14, 01:30 PM
Never had an MRE either, and agree, C-rats weren't so bad. The only problem was after eating them 3x a day in the field, I was unable to shiit for days.
I never chose the rat with fruitcake in...
02-10-14, 11:29 AM
Do the same thing myself Lisa, I also get inundated with spam emails and if I don't recognize the sender, I don't bother opening it.
My mom always answered every single phone call thinking it...
The rest here...
After everyone on earth was dead and waiting to enter heaven, God appeared and said:
"I want the men to make two lines behind the two gates. One gate is for weak henpecked husbands, and the other...
He may be a boom for the bail bond industry...
Fukc putting that little shiit in the Corps, drop him in the middle of Siberia and let him make his snobby little arse back to Toronto. In fact, send his worthless enabling father with him.
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