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Hello Marines,
Currently a poolee shipping out in 2 weeks. Also have a baby on the way. Im currently not with the mother and wont be happening sadly. Just want your thoughts. I leave and I comeback that week that she is due, which makes it very likely that I will miss the birth, now keep in mind I dont even know if the mother will even want me to be there regardless. But as I said just want your thoughts on the matter and maybe some advice. Thanks in advance.
Does your recruiter know about this? If not, you'd better tell him like yesterday. As far as the Marine Corps is concerned, the baby will be your dependent, regardless of how the mother feels about you. This can have an effect on your ship date if the appropriate paperwork isn't done in time.
Also, are you 100% certain the baby is yours? Has DNA testing been done?
Yes my recruiter has been aware of the situation since my enlistment. And no I am not 100% certain however its a very high chance since she claims it is mine just dont trust her enough to be 100%. And yes I know about the whole paperwork side they're getting all of that stuff done for me. Just want your thoughts on me possibly missing out on the birth and honestly if there's anyone here who went through a similar situation with the marine corp to please share how you handled it. Thanks in advance and for your comment.
First, Marine Corps is spelled with capital letters and an "s" at the end of Corps. We are not a corporation.Quote:
Originally Posted by barretowg
Second, get 100% proof of paternity. Her word is the worst proof that exists.
Third, if the baby comes along while you are still in boot camp, oh well. You're going to miss it.
Fourth, assuming you're home on boot leave at the time she downloads, the mother usually has the final say as to who is allowed to be in the birthing room with her at the time. If that isn't you, oh well. You're going to miss it.
Fifth, from now on, wear a raincoat.
Sixth, if the baby is yours, and the mother demands child support through appropriate legal channels, you will be paying it and the Marine Corps will help her get it. Automatically deducted from your pay. This is why you want to be 100% certain you are the father.
Seventh, from now on, wear a raincoat, maybe two.
Missing birthdays, weddings, funerals, etc comes with the job. Happens every day so get used to it.
Imagine your name will be on the birth certificate? The birth certificate will be the source document to make the baby your legal dependent and affect their eligibility for DEERS (ID card), healthcare, etc. You really need to have the hospital do a paternity (blood) test at birth to guarantee 100% that baby is yours. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life not knowing for sure, or the next 18 years paying child support for a kid who may belong to someone else? The mother will have custody of this child (you can't being single on active duty). So, you will not be involved in this child's life at least for the foreseeable future except for paying child support.
Sucks to be you. You are not starting this new journey with the best foot forward. Some people have to learn things the hard way. This is a mistake you do not want to make, and cannot afford, again.
Good luck. And, keep it in your pants.
Dude get a paternity test -- either way will be one of the most important decisions you ever make.
Mike
Consider even -Quote:
Originally Posted by Zulu 36
Double Baggin' It -
one for your head,
one for hers
GET THAT BABY'S DNA TESTED AS SOON AS IT IS BORN!!!!! If the child turns out to be yours, you'll be paying child support for the next 18 years, at least... if it is NOT yours, I would advise you to tell the mother to "suck eggs" and walk away, don't look back, and get on with your life...... GOOD LUCK.....
and don't be put on as the Father on the birth certificate until you get the DNA checked once on there if your not the biological father she can stall and delay or just plain refuse the DNA test and use that as proof for child support.
I was too busy training to have a child in boot camp....free time....damn...
I can only send you in the right direction..........We have a Senior Member here, that has extensive experience in this matter. Advanced is his user name ( Russ ) is his AKA. Russ has around 94 grandchildren, and 46 great grand children. All was conceived, while he was on active duty. Never paid any child support. Never married any of the mothers, all his grandchildren were of Vietnamese, Cuban, and African descent. There was no birth certificates, as all were born in Huts or in the Jungle. He has grandchildren who are direct descendants of Ho-Chi-Mien..... Fidel Castro, and Shaka Zulu. He was a legend in the Corps....they called him (#1). Contact him for expert advice......and Good luck.Attachment 32390