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Phantom Blooper
06-14-09, 11:00 AM
As we go through life we frequently encounter people military/civilian who........uhhhh.......how shall I say it....don't quite measure up to our standards, whatever those are, and we have expressions to politely refer to their shortcomings.

Now, I know there are many more of these euphemisms and I thought it might be productive to catalog them here on this forum.

Possibly to be used for future reference.

Any more?

1.)As useless as a screen door in a submarine.

2.)Dumber than a box of rocks

3.)His driveway doesn't go all the way to the garage

4.)Couple sandwiches short of a picnic

5.)Ain't got all his shingles nailed down

6.)She's got a firm grip on the steering wheel but the battery is dead.

7.) He's fishing' with a empty hook

8.) Dumber than dirt.

9.) Doesn't have the sense that God gave a goose.

10.) Dumber than a coal bucket.

11.) Not the brightest penny in the fountain.

12.) A few French fries short of a Happy Meal.

13.) His watermelon doesn't thump.


:evilgrin:

thewookie
06-14-09, 11:02 AM
I'd drag my balls through 50 miles of broken glass and concertina wire covered in rubbing alcohol just to sniff one of her farts.

Does that count as that one of them?:nerd:

Phantom Blooper
06-14-09, 11:06 AM
Other than being a few French fries shy of a Happy Meal....do you have pics or a scratch and sniff sample?

If so I would guess that the above would qualify.:evilgrin:

sparkie
06-14-09, 11:41 AM
A few bricks shy of a load.

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

If Brains were gasoline, You wouldn't have enough to power a pizz ant's motor scooter.

If brains were dynamite, you couldn't blow your nose.

mcvet57103
06-15-09, 02:06 PM
Not the sharpest crayon in the box.
Worthless as teats on a Bore Hog.
Don't have both oars in the water.
Elevator doesn't go all the way to the Pent House.
Dumber than Sh*t.
Look up stupid in the Dictionary and there's a picture of him/her.
If he had half a brain he'd be smart enough to be stupid.

CH53MetalMan
06-15-09, 11:13 PM
He is eat-up with the dumb ass.

Phantom Blooper
06-16-09, 05:34 PM
Has a brain like a BB in a boxcar.

As sharp as a marble and twice as smart.

Couldn't pour pizz out of a boot with instructions on the heel.

Was first in line for brains, but ended up holding the door open .:evilgrin:

Quinbo
06-16-09, 05:40 PM
Would gladly trade him for a box of mud
Has reached rock bottem and continues to dig
His leadership skills are such that he probably couldn't lead a private to the e-club on payday

Rocky C
06-16-09, 05:56 PM
Few cards short of a full deck.
Dumber than a 2 dollar bill.
Engages mouth before Brain.
About as useless as tits on a bull.
The only guy I know that p*sses into a windstorm.

Ed Palmer
06-16-09, 06:06 PM
Few cards short of a full deck.
Dumber than a 2 dollar bill.
Engages mouth before Brain.
About as useless as tits on a bull.
The only guy I know that p*sses into a windstorm.



I think you meant 3 dollar bill
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