thedrifter
07-01-03, 10:52 AM
Let There Be 2600 Marines!
In the beginning was the word. And the word was passed when the earth was without organization or field day. And upon the first day, God said, "Let there be light," and he called the light day and the darkness night, or mid. And God saw that they were good.
On the second day, God created the earth, the seas that cover the earth and the heavens over the earth. And God looked upon the earth and seas and heavens and saw that they were good. Except for some crummy spots in isolated areas of the earth. And God had an idea. God said, "Let there be little square buildings with no windows in those crummy spots and surround them with poles and wires." And God looked at his creation and saw it was about what he had expected.
On the third day, God created men and placed them on the surface of the earth and everywhere on the earth there lived man. Except for those crummy spots where men refused to live. And God said, "Let there be a special kind of men to live in those spots, and let them speak a strange language and tell no man what they do." And God created these men out of forged steel and said, "You shall be called 2600 Marines and you will think of yourselves as having special abilities and favors in my sight."
On the fourth day, God was awakened early by a great noise. And God saw that it was the Marines calling his name and crying that they had nothing to do. And God spoke to them and said, "Arise and go into the square building where I have set for you many wondrous devices covered with multitudes of knobs and switches. And you shall spend your days listening to the music of heaven." Saying this, God gave unto them the combination to the doors that they might safeguard it and live in peace until called upon to make war.
On the fifth day, God created the birds of the air, the beasts of the sea and every variety of plant and animal that liveth on the face of the earth. And God moved upon the earth and heard a great grumbling and complaining from the square buildings of the Marines. "We are too many," they said, "and cannot all fit into this place that you have made for us." God saw that they were indeed too many and divided them into three parts that one part may work during the day, another may work at night, and the third would rule over the other two. And then God saw that the sun had passed the Zenith and he had a second idea. God said, "Let there be training days." And a great lamentation arose from the Marines, for they had witnessed the death of their break days. Then God created the Training Chief, the ancient word for "maker of trouble".
On the sixth day, God was putting a few finishing touches on creation when once again His peace was interrupted by the loud complaining of the Marines. "Oh Lord," they said, "We keep the hours that you have set for us, but still find dissention and strife in our midst. We know not which one of us is to turn which knob or which of us should change the light bulbs." And God said unto them, "I will make of you a number of MOS's, and called their numbers 2621, 2629, 2649, 2674, and so on. Your numbers will prefix with 26, the number which standeth for those able men of rare intellect!" Thus did God create a hatred from other Marines for His SIGINT Marines.
On the seventh day, he rested and at the twelfth hour of the day, there again arose a great noise from the square building of the 2600's and God called his Angel "The Bringer of Light" to his side and spoke unto him. "I am in the midst of creating football games and wish not to be disturbed. Go thou and tend to those Marines and their problems. And Lucifer said, "Aye, aye sir" and departed from heaven to earth.
:marine:
In the beginning was the word. And the word was passed when the earth was without organization or field day. And upon the first day, God said, "Let there be light," and he called the light day and the darkness night, or mid. And God saw that they were good.
On the second day, God created the earth, the seas that cover the earth and the heavens over the earth. And God looked upon the earth and seas and heavens and saw that they were good. Except for some crummy spots in isolated areas of the earth. And God had an idea. God said, "Let there be little square buildings with no windows in those crummy spots and surround them with poles and wires." And God looked at his creation and saw it was about what he had expected.
On the third day, God created men and placed them on the surface of the earth and everywhere on the earth there lived man. Except for those crummy spots where men refused to live. And God said, "Let there be a special kind of men to live in those spots, and let them speak a strange language and tell no man what they do." And God created these men out of forged steel and said, "You shall be called 2600 Marines and you will think of yourselves as having special abilities and favors in my sight."
On the fourth day, God was awakened early by a great noise. And God saw that it was the Marines calling his name and crying that they had nothing to do. And God spoke to them and said, "Arise and go into the square building where I have set for you many wondrous devices covered with multitudes of knobs and switches. And you shall spend your days listening to the music of heaven." Saying this, God gave unto them the combination to the doors that they might safeguard it and live in peace until called upon to make war.
On the fifth day, God created the birds of the air, the beasts of the sea and every variety of plant and animal that liveth on the face of the earth. And God moved upon the earth and heard a great grumbling and complaining from the square buildings of the Marines. "We are too many," they said, "and cannot all fit into this place that you have made for us." God saw that they were indeed too many and divided them into three parts that one part may work during the day, another may work at night, and the third would rule over the other two. And then God saw that the sun had passed the Zenith and he had a second idea. God said, "Let there be training days." And a great lamentation arose from the Marines, for they had witnessed the death of their break days. Then God created the Training Chief, the ancient word for "maker of trouble".
On the sixth day, God was putting a few finishing touches on creation when once again His peace was interrupted by the loud complaining of the Marines. "Oh Lord," they said, "We keep the hours that you have set for us, but still find dissention and strife in our midst. We know not which one of us is to turn which knob or which of us should change the light bulbs." And God said unto them, "I will make of you a number of MOS's, and called their numbers 2621, 2629, 2649, 2674, and so on. Your numbers will prefix with 26, the number which standeth for those able men of rare intellect!" Thus did God create a hatred from other Marines for His SIGINT Marines.
On the seventh day, he rested and at the twelfth hour of the day, there again arose a great noise from the square building of the 2600's and God called his Angel "The Bringer of Light" to his side and spoke unto him. "I am in the midst of creating football games and wish not to be disturbed. Go thou and tend to those Marines and their problems. And Lucifer said, "Aye, aye sir" and departed from heaven to earth.
:marine: