thedrifter
03-20-09, 08:12 AM
Mother finds solace in room dedicated to first New Yorker to die in Iraq war
BY Stephanie Gaskell
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER
Friday, March 20th 2009, 12:41 AM
For the past six years, Amarilys Hernandez has set an extra plate for Thanksgiving, put a present under the Christmas tree and made a birthday cake for her son Marine Cpl. Robert Marcus Rodriguez - the first New Yorker to die in the Iraq war.
"Sometimes I can feel him hugging me," Hernandez told the Daily News.
So many weeks and months have passed since Rodriguez was killed March 25, 2003, but his family has kept his memory alive.
They even moved from Maspeth, Queens, to Baldwin, L.I., to be closer to his gravesite at Pinelawn Cemetery in Farmingdale.
"We live our lives as if he's still here," said sister Hyda Hernandez-Lopez, 44, a retired NYPD officer. "He's not here physically, but he's here in this house. He's always with us."
Rodriguez was killed just five days after the war began. He and three of his fellow Marines died when their Abrams tank rolled over into the Tigris River during a sandstorm.
The native New Yorker wasn't married, had no children. Like many of the 4,258 service members killed in Iraq, he was just 21.
The youngest of three sisters and a brother, Rodriguez was following in his older siblings' footsteps when he enlisted. His brother, Hector, 46, was in the Army and his sister Glenda, 42, served in the Navy.
When Rodriguez was 17, he asked his mother if she would sign the papers to allow him to join the Marines because he was still a minor.
"I kept telling him no," she said. "He begged me."
A Marine recruiting officer visited the house and finally she gave in - never envisioning that nearly four years later, two Marines would come to her door again.
Amarilys, 68, and her husband, Clemente, 70, were in shock as they buried their youngest son.
"I went through a long time of denial," Amarilys said. "I didn't believe he was gone. I kept thinking, 'This isn't happening. He's going to come home.'"
She set up a shrine to her son in a spare room, filled with everything from his uniform to his third-grade report card.
"I come in here and I talk to him," she said. "I always come out with a different mindset. It makes me feel better. Also, I have a lot of grandchildren - they help me get through it."
"There are some nights I feel at peace and then there are nights I wake up mad," she added. "I will be happy when the war is over and they all can come home."
The family's pain is lessened by the support they get from all over over the country. People have sent them homemade quilts, painted portraits and lots of flowers.
"They just leave them on the door," said Rodriguez's other sister Moura, 39, an accountant. "There are good people out there who don't forget."
Still, it's been tough for the family to watch the war drag on.
"I stopped watching anything that has to do with the war. That part of me just changed forever," Moura said. "I'm not mad anymore. I was mad, but I'm not anymore.
"I just miss my brother."
sgaskell@nydailynews.com
Ellie
BY Stephanie Gaskell
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER
Friday, March 20th 2009, 12:41 AM
For the past six years, Amarilys Hernandez has set an extra plate for Thanksgiving, put a present under the Christmas tree and made a birthday cake for her son Marine Cpl. Robert Marcus Rodriguez - the first New Yorker to die in the Iraq war.
"Sometimes I can feel him hugging me," Hernandez told the Daily News.
So many weeks and months have passed since Rodriguez was killed March 25, 2003, but his family has kept his memory alive.
They even moved from Maspeth, Queens, to Baldwin, L.I., to be closer to his gravesite at Pinelawn Cemetery in Farmingdale.
"We live our lives as if he's still here," said sister Hyda Hernandez-Lopez, 44, a retired NYPD officer. "He's not here physically, but he's here in this house. He's always with us."
Rodriguez was killed just five days after the war began. He and three of his fellow Marines died when their Abrams tank rolled over into the Tigris River during a sandstorm.
The native New Yorker wasn't married, had no children. Like many of the 4,258 service members killed in Iraq, he was just 21.
The youngest of three sisters and a brother, Rodriguez was following in his older siblings' footsteps when he enlisted. His brother, Hector, 46, was in the Army and his sister Glenda, 42, served in the Navy.
When Rodriguez was 17, he asked his mother if she would sign the papers to allow him to join the Marines because he was still a minor.
"I kept telling him no," she said. "He begged me."
A Marine recruiting officer visited the house and finally she gave in - never envisioning that nearly four years later, two Marines would come to her door again.
Amarilys, 68, and her husband, Clemente, 70, were in shock as they buried their youngest son.
"I went through a long time of denial," Amarilys said. "I didn't believe he was gone. I kept thinking, 'This isn't happening. He's going to come home.'"
She set up a shrine to her son in a spare room, filled with everything from his uniform to his third-grade report card.
"I come in here and I talk to him," she said. "I always come out with a different mindset. It makes me feel better. Also, I have a lot of grandchildren - they help me get through it."
"There are some nights I feel at peace and then there are nights I wake up mad," she added. "I will be happy when the war is over and they all can come home."
The family's pain is lessened by the support they get from all over over the country. People have sent them homemade quilts, painted portraits and lots of flowers.
"They just leave them on the door," said Rodriguez's other sister Moura, 39, an accountant. "There are good people out there who don't forget."
Still, it's been tough for the family to watch the war drag on.
"I stopped watching anything that has to do with the war. That part of me just changed forever," Moura said. "I'm not mad anymore. I was mad, but I'm not anymore.
"I just miss my brother."
sgaskell@nydailynews.com
Ellie