Phantom Blooper
06-22-03, 08:25 AM
And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach and green and yellow vegetables of all kinds,so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives. And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99-cent double cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with that?" And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds........And God created the healthful yogurt,that Woman might keep her figure that man found so fair, and Satan froze the yogurt,and he brought forth chocolate,nuts and brightly colored sprinkle candy to put on the yogurt. And Woman gained pounds. ..............And God said,"Try my crispy fresh salad." And Satan brought forth creamy dressing,bacon bits,and shredded cheeses of all kinds.And there was ice cream for dessert. And Woman gained pounds................... And God said,"I have sent your heart healthy vegetables and olive oil with which to cook them." And Satan brought forth chicken-fried-steak from Cracker Barrel so big it needed its own platter. And man gained pounds,and his bad cholesterol went through the roof. ...............And God brought forth running shoes,and Man resolved to lose those extra pounds. And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2..............And God said,"Your running up the score, Devil." And God brought forth the potato,a vegetable naturally low in fat and brimming with nutition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep- fried them and added salt. And he created sour cream dip also. And Man clutched his remote control and ate potato chips swaddled in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said,"It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest. And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.... And Satan created HMO's.