PDA

View Full Version : What should I do?



lianetkirby
12-09-08, 03:21 AM
So I just found out recently that me and my husband are going to have our first child. He should be born around the end August. Anyways Mike deploys in April which means he will not be home for the birth of our first child which makes me not a happy camper. I've talked with him about me possibly moving back home while he is deployed and he really hasnt had much input but he feels it would be best too, mainly cause I would be in a more comfortable environment and closer to family rather than being on my own and stressing over the baby and Mike being gone. What are your thoughts on all of this, I need input people this is a first time for both of us.

Pete0331
12-09-08, 03:27 AM
So I just found out recently that me and my husband are going to have our first child. He should be born around the end August. Anyways Mike deploys in April which means he will not be home for the birth of our first child which makes me not a happy camper. I've talked with him about me possibly moving back home while he is deployed and he really hasnt had much input but he feels it would be best too, mainly cause I would be in a more comfortable environment and closer to family rather than being on my own and stressing over the baby and Mike being gone. What are your thoughts on all of this, I need input people this is a first time for both of us.

Go where you can have the most emotional support.

You also need to get in touch with other Marine wives that have their husbands deployed. Usually this can be done by contacting the unit commanders' wife.

Big Jim
12-09-08, 05:10 AM
So I just found out recently that me and my husband are going to have our first child. He should be born around the end August. Anyways Mike deploys in April which means he will not be home for the birth of our first child which makes me not a happy camper. I've talked with him about me possibly moving back home while he is deployed and he really hasnt had much input but he feels it would be best too, mainly cause I would be in a more comfortable environment and closer to family rather than being on my own and stressing over the baby and Mike being gone. What are your thoughts on all of this, I need input people this is a first time for both of us.


Think of your unborn child first, Lianet...welcome aboard by the way. Being close to family would be what I would want when I was in your husband's boots. At least you'd be with family for the support and the care you will need. Afterall, he won't be there for the first few months of the baby's life, right? You would want and need family you trust and love around for you and that baby. Everything is just a phone call or an email away and the benefits of having family close is absolutely priceless.

Yeah you could take those phone numbers for his command with you, such as the CO's phone number as well as base housing registration, for when he comes back. Oh and don't forget the NCO's wives clubs who can help you out immensley. Those you really need would be to establish your housing and identification of the new baby and that should be all you need. Now go and take care of yourself and let family be apart of the blessing...!!!

Gator347
12-09-08, 10:07 AM
Congradulations. Children are a blessing.

As a parent, if you were my daughter-in-law I would want nothing more that to have you home. The only issue you might have is getting "Grandma" to give up the baby:)

You, your husband & your baby-to-be will be in our thoughts & prayers:angel:

DobbinsBlythe
12-10-08, 10:39 PM
I would definitely go back to my family if it were me... unless you have like.. 10 BEST friends willing to all take off of work to help you with the baby, coach you during birth, help you change diapers, make sure you don't over-stress yourself.. etc. OR... have mom (if she doesn't work/mind...etc) come see you. My friend Tracy is due.. day after tomorrow (tomorrow happens to be HER birthday) and her mom has flown to Jacksonville from Texas to be with her during the birth and for about a month afterwards. I think for her that was the best decision. Her husband comes home from deployment in about 3 months... so having a baby's room was another reason she stayed home during the pregnancy.

Remember that when your man comes home, he's gotta have a home too.. and with a baby, it's harder to start over fresh than it is to just make a new baby's room.

Lots of decisions! I hope you make the best for yourself. Everyone's situation is different.

God bless & Congrats! Also.. if you need any emotional support during the deployment, hit me up. My hubby deploys around March-ish... so I'll be up all hours of the night when your hubby goes too. (oh.. and we're moving to Camp Pendleton.. AND my Cousin and her hubby are at 29 palms.)... ??

<3

MrsNix
03-11-09, 12:47 AM
My daughter was born in 2003, and my husband was gone in Iraq throughout the pregnancy. The best thing I ever did was move home to be with family. At that time, we had not been an active duty family, so I was not on a duty station with friends around me. I was in our civilian marital home...thousands of miles from family.

Each situation is different, so the most important questions you need to ask yourself are:

1.) In the absence of my husband, who will bring me the most peace of mind during pregnancy and delivery?

2.) Who, among my family and friends, is going to be the MOST ABLE and WILLING to give me sound advice and help with the newborn?

3.) Where is the HEALTHIEST place for me to live without my husband here?

---------

If your family is your rock...go to them. If your current duty station feels like home for you and your housing is where you want to stay...find people around you that are able and willing to support you. It's a lot to consider, but you WILL make it through this.

We have a close friend with five children. The husband has been deployed for EVERY ONE of the births. I kid you not. It's a joke with them, now. She gets pregnant, and weeks later, he gets orders. Like clockwork.

So...have your good cry out...and then get to the business of making sure you're set up with security and a sense of stability wherever you happen to be.

Petz
03-11-09, 12:52 AM
WOW mrs Nix you rock with that great advice.... that is so sage-like.

I vote for Mrs Nix to be the spouse rep for the site! haha