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thedrifter
10-19-08, 08:59 AM
At homecoming, families talk about time apart

By Cindy Fisher, Stars and Stripes
Pacific edition, Monday, October 20, 2008

CAMP FOSTER, Okinawa — The families of the more than 200 Marine Wing Support Squadron 172 troops began gathering more than an hour before the unit’s return Saturday. Their loved ones had been gone seven months.

While the Marines and sailors were deployed to Iraq, they missed birthdays, graduations and many other life events. Here’s a look at some of the homecomings.
Missed birthday

Gunnery Sgt. Don Arbini turned 40 in May while in the desert, so his family tried to share it with him as best they could.

"We got him a bunch of stuff. Mailed him cards and junk food that he couldn’t get there," his wife Maggy said. "We’ve mailed him a card a day to show him we missed him."

Many of the cards were homemade, and making them became a family project to help pass the time while he was gone, she said.

They made the cards "just to make him happy," said his oldest daughter, Kaylie, 12.

The family planned to take Dad out to dinner to celebrate his missed birthday and youngest daughter Kylie’s 8th birthday, which is Tuesday.

The family is happy to be reunited with their Marine, but Maggy Arbini said she has another reason to celebrate his return.

"I am officially retired from cutting grass," she said. "No more yard work and no more getting up early to walk the dog."

Changing diapers

Alissa Quintan, 22, is more than ready to turn over some tasks to her husband, Sgt. Eric Quintan.

"I think it’s about time he changes a diaper," she said. "He hasn’t changed one in seven months, so he might be out of practice."

She gave birth to the couple’s daughter Rei in June and their 3-year-old is still in diapers.

She admits she tried to potty train their son while her husband was gone, but it’s "kind of hard" for just one parent to care for a infant and a toddler, she said.

She was happy her sister stayed for a month after Rei was born, which was a great help, she said.

Eric has seen pictures of his daughter, but there are many things about their new child that she wants to share with him, Alissa said.

"She started laughing a lot yesterday," she said.

After the first laugh, mom and daughter had a "giggle fest" together, she said. "So I hope I can get her to do that for daddy."

Missed firsts

There have been a lot of things that Sgt. Justin Milan has missed too, said his wife Melissa.

Their youngest son Conner is one, she said. Conner’s daddy missed his first word and first steps. "He’s just a big boy now," she said.

She, Conner and Milan’s step-children, Kaleb McNair, 10, and Paige McNair, 7, are eager to see Dad. "It’s been a long time," and it hasn’t been easy, Melissa said.

Taking care of three children by herself has been hard, she said, adding that single moms don’t get enough credit.

"You get used to it, and then it’ll be weird when he gets back — just having him home and in the house again when we were on our own routine," she said.

Another advantage of having her husband home?

"I won’t have to be the bad guy all the time" with the kids, Melissa said.

Still waiting

Denise Barnette and her daughter Sadie, 9, also were waiting at Marine Wing Support Squadron 172’s compound, although their Marine, Gunnery Sgt. David Barnette, didn’t return Saturday.

"We’re just here to support the squadron," said Denise, who was on hand for the return of the unit’s advance party two weeks ago.

Cheering on the other Marines makes them feel closer to David, because they are all part of the same Marine family, Denise said. "It would feel strange not to be here," she said.

Unfortunately, they won’t be able to run to their Marine when he does return, because Sadie tore ligaments in her foot Friday, when she tripped at her school’s library. Now she’s hobbling around on crutches.

Nevertheless, the two have a lot to tell David.

The couple’s son graduated from high school and is now in the States with family. Their car had a flat tire. An aunt and a cousin passed away.

"Everything seems to happen while he’s gone," Denise said. This has been her husband’s fourth deployment to the desert. "Nothing I couldn’t handle. But a lot of things I don’t tell him because he’s not here, and I don’t want to stress him. … It’s more important for him to focus on his job and taking care of his Marines."

Ellie