brain surgery

[wrbones]

This Marine, all messed up from Vietnam, went to the hospital to get checked. Because of the war, his brain was all scewed up, and all he could say was the words to the Marines hymn.


So the doctor asked his name, he replied, "From the halls of montezuma..."


The doctor decided to remove part of his brain, thinking that would cure it. When the doctor did this, the Marine still said "From the halls of montezuma..."


The doctor figured he did not remove enough of the brain. So after removing some more, the marine still only said those words.


The doctor, now getting frustrated, decided to take the rest of the brain out. Now the Marine, with no brain, stood up and started singing, "Be all that you can be..."

[wrbones]

After a fire started in a downtown hotel four of the guests found the exit downstairs blocked by fire. The guests consisted of an Army Captain, a Navy Captain, an Air Force Col. and a Marine Major.

Surrounded by the fire, the four went up to the roof.

The fire truck soon arrived and the firemen held out a net and yelled up "Ok Groundpounder, jump!"

The Army Captain responded "I am an Officer and Gentlemen in the United States Army and you will address me as such."

The firemen yelled back, "Ok, Captain, sir, jump!"

The Captain jumped the firemen moved the net and the Captain splattered on the ground.

The firemen yelled up "Ok, Swabbie, jump!"

The Navy Captain yelled back "I graduated from the Naval Academy and you will show respect."

The firemen yelled up "Ok, sir, jump!" again the firemen moved the net and another splat.

The firemen yelled up "Ok, Flyboy, jump!" The Air Force Col.yelled back "I am a top ace in the Air Force and I deserve respect."

The firemen said "Ok, pilot sir, jump!" They again moved the net and another splat.

The firemen yelled up "Ok, Jarhead, jump!"

The Marine Major yelled down "I'm not stupid like those other guys, you're not moving the net on me. Before I jump put that net on the ground and step back three paces."