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thedrifter
05-18-08, 08:29 AM
Web-posted Sunday, May 18, 2008
Jon Mark Beilue: Sacrifices never stop
Family faces many battle fronts
By Jon Mark Beilue
Column

Sgt. Shad Fowler and wife Chelsey can't be blamed if they ever wonder how much more one military family can handle. It's been four years of sacrifice, surgeries, stress, separation and struggles.

"It has made us stronger, definitely," said Fowler, in Amarillo this past week on leave from Fort Hood. "A lot of stuff now doesn't bother us. Really, there can't be much more happen to us that hasn't already happened."

It would have been difficult enough if it were just Fowler having been nearly killed while on patrol in Sadr City, Iraq, when a roadside bomb blew him 15 feet away.

It would have been difficult enough just enduring the daily hardships of their son, Caden, 4, who was born with genetical translocation - an exchange of the No. 1 and No. 15 chromosome - hypoplastic lungs and nonfunctioning kidneys. That almost overshadows the hearing and speech problems, rickets and hip dysplasia.

But put those together, put the birth of Caden and the war wounds of Shad just four months apart, and it can rip the will and drain the strength away from any family. Today is national Armed Forces Day, and locally, the America Supports You - Texas banquet, is the occasional reminder of what some face every draining day.

"Sometimes I think how can I do this every day," Chelsey said, "but when you have to, you just do it."

What Shad envisioned when he enlisted in February 2001 - three months before graduation from Tascosa, and seven months before 9/11 - was not what has occurred. The oldest of five brothers, three of whom are Marines, Shad felt the pull of duty.

"I'd always been fascinated by the military," he said. "But I just wanted to serve my country. You can't ask more from a person that to serve his country."

Learning to walk again

Shad and Chelsey Cagle married in March 2003. A year later, they were expecting their first son. What they weren't expecting was the mountain of health problems that were obvious less than an hour after his birth and forced the newborn to be helicoptered to University Medical Center in Lubbock.

Specialist Fowler of the U.S. Army's First Cavalry, in Amarillo for the birth, was about to be deployed to Iraq. His deployment was delayed a couple of weeks because of Caden's health, but in April 2004 he could delay no longer.

"It was real hard - it took a lot for me to leave," Fowler said, "but I did have a duty I had to fulfill with my guys. Chelsey understood. Caden was at least stabilized. We talked with each other and decided it was time to go."

Three months later, in July 2004, Chelsey picked up the cell phone. It was the call the wife of any serviceman dreads. Shad was badly wounded while on patrol.

He lost part of his right shin. Shrapnel went into his sinus cavity. Shrapnel went across his arms and legs, sliced up his stomach.

If he had not instinctively turned at the moment the bomb exploded, barely avoiding a direct blast, he would have been dead.

"It just feels like your world has totally fallen apart," Chelsey said. "I've got a 4-month-old son that it's a daily struggle, and now I have a husband that I don't know if he's going to live or die."

Shad had surgery at nearby Balad Air Base, was transferred to Germany for more surgery, and flown to the U.S. for further surgeries at three hospitals, including Walter Reed Army Medical Center in Washington, D.C., and Darnall Medical Center at Fort Hood.

Eventually, Shad returned to Amarillo for 30 days where he had to, among other things, learn how to walk again. When he did, and his 30 days were up, he returned to Fort Hood in Killeen.

An easy decision

That was four years ago. Shad could have opted out of the Army after he was wounded. But he didn't.

Some of it was because of the Army's insurance, since Caden's condition makes him uninsurable. But he said Medicaid and Medicare pay a large share of that anyway.

"I love the Army," he said. "It's a great place. It's great for a family, too. It would be hard for a family who doesn't know that to understand, but Chelsey and I have been doing that for so long, it's second nature."

Sgt. Fowler returned from his second tour in Iraq in January, a 15-month deployment where he was a mechanic at Camp Taji. It's likely he will make a third trip from Fort Hood to Iraq before the end of the year.

His sacrifice, while great, is no greater than Chelsey's. She put on hold college and a career as a nurse, probably permanently, for her son's constant care. She's had her share of panic attacks when the challenges just get to be too much.

Caden hasn't had a normal day since he was born. He's had more surgeries than his dad, including a three-week hospital stay in March after he got peritonitis. Chelsey must take him to Children's Medical Center each month for testing. He gets sick easily and it takes a long time to recover.

Chelsey feeds him two to three times daily through a Mic-Key button in his stomach. He goes to therapy for speech and eating skills four days a week. He is on kidney dialysis for 12 hours each day.

He needs a kidney transplant. Chelsey would like to donate hers, possibly by the end of 2008. But testing is not complete and Caden needs to grow before it gets to that point.

The Fowlers have twice lived near Fort Hood, but have discovered that for Chelsey, with her family and in-laws in Amarillo, the support system is better here. So Shad calls each night, gets pictures over the cell phone, drives to Dallas monthly for the doctor's appointment, and takes as much leave, like the current eight-day stay, as he can.

So the days like Thursday are special. Days when Caden can play with Gary, a snail named after the one on "SpongeBob Square Pants," with his grandmother, Sherri Thomas, while his parents watch are ones to hold on to.

"It's hard - I ain't going to lie, it's been hard," Fowler said. "But it's a sacrifice I've made and a sacrifice Chelsey has made. It's a job, and we both have jobs to do."

Jon Mark Beilue's column appears Sunday, Wednesday and Friday. He can be reached at jon.beilue@amarillo.com or (806) 345-3318.

Ellie