View Full Version : Sean Penn and Baghdad, The Real Story

04-19-03, 04:05 AM
Story from BobFromAccounting.com (http://www.bobfromaccounting.com/12_18/spicoli.html)

BAGHDAD -- Actor and director Sean Penn spent his third day in Baghdad Friday, attempting to explain to Arab and other international journalists his staunch antiwar position and his hopes to help ease the Iraqi conflict with the United States.

Instead, the former Hollywood bad boy and one-time husband to pop singer Madonna, spent yet another agonizing day fielding questions about his 1982 role as surfer-stoner Jeff Spicoli in "Fast Times at Ridgemont High."

"As a father, an actor, a filmmaker and patriot, my visit to Iraq is for me a natural extension of my obligation...to find my own voice on matters of conscience," Penn said after taking a tour of a Baghdad children's hospital.

"But could you tell us please about the time you ordered a pizza pie during school hours?" asked a curious member of the Iraqi press corps. "That was really crazy that you did that."

"Yeah, tell us about the pizza!" echoed several Iraqi reporters.

"I'm not sure I understand the question," replied the uncomfortable-looking actor while attempting to change the subject. "I know that in Iraq, children don't benefit from the educational opportunities we are fortunate enough to have in America."

"Mr. Penn, I have a two part question," began al-Jazeera reporter Samir Achmed. "What do you expect to gain from your visit here, and also, could you tell us what 'gnarley' means?"

Penn became noticeably agitated and explained that "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" was simply a movie he did many years ago and it was "completely irrelevant to the purpose of the current discourse."

"Do you still keep in contact with Mr. Hand and does he know you use words like discourse?" an unnamed reporter interrupted. "You should tell him and maybe he might let you attend that senior dance." The others quickly agreed.

"It was a f*cking movie character! Penn shouted angrily. "I'm not Jeff Spicoli. I'm not in high school. I'm a 42-year-old American citizen concerned that if you don't tell us where your ******* weapons are, my government will obliterate you in a matter of minutes."

Deputy Prime Minister Tareq Aziz then publicly apologized to the actor and promised there would be no more questions about his movie career.

"I'm sorry if any reporters offended you with their questions," Aziz said afterwards. "But I have been given strict orders by President Hussein to ask you if you perhaps know the phone number of a Ms. Phoebe Cates. And if so, are you aware if she ever married that stereo salesman from the mall?"