Stinky problem

[Dog]

Hi, thanks for helping us all out. I have a question. I don't know if this is the right place to ask. I want to go into the Marine Corps Reserve, but I've been thinking that it isn't possible because:
1. I'm already 29 and will turn 30 in Dec.
2. I reak pretty badly that people can't even get within 2 yards without gagging. And if I don't shower, it gets even worse.


My questions are:
1. I've been thinking it's impossible for me to be recruited in the Marines because of all of this. Is it true? Will these problems prevent me from being recuited?
3. Have any of you had the same problems? Have you known anyone in the Marines that had these problems and did they make it worse for the rest of you? Do they get the Gomer Pyle treatment (Full Metal Jacket)?

Thanks again, Dog

[BR34]

I'm ****ing speechless!

[RYDERKUR]

Oh boy!! I can't wait until some of the salty NCO's get a whiff of this one (no pun intended) haha

[Isrowei]

Dog, what do you eat?

It's a serious question. You might consider doing some internet research on it as well. Many things can directly influence how our body smells. A lot of it is controllable.

In the meantime, shower often. Use deodorant. Brush your teeth. Avoid spicey foods. If all else fails, talk to a doc.

[rvillac2]

Dear Chilli,

Grandma has just moved here from the old country and we've been feasting on some home cookin. I have noticed that people tend to respect my personal space a lot more these days. I never have a problem walking through busy sidewalks and people go out of their way to give me room in a crowded elevator. When I get to MCRD, will the DI's also respect my personal space?

On a related question, am I responsible for picking up the dead bugs that seem to always surround the area I am standing?

Sincerely,
Dog Breath

[Marine84]

It's OK Dog - some of these guys smelled bad too before they became Marines - some of them STILL smell bad.

[Marine84]

Dear Chilli,

Grandma has just moved here from the old country and we've been feasting on some home cookin. I have noticed that people tend to respect my personal space a lot more these days. I never have a problem walking through busy sidewalks and people go out of their way to give me room in a crowded elevator. When I get to MCRD, will the DI's also respect my personal space?

On a related question, am I responsible for picking up the dead bugs that seem to always surround the area I am standing?

Sincerely,
Dog Breath

LMAO!

[rvillac2]

Dog, what do you eat?

It's a serious question. You might consider doing some internet research on it as well. Many things can directly influence how our body smells. A lot of it is controllable.

In the meantime, shower often. Use deodorant. Brush your teeth. Avoid spicey foods. If all else fails, talk to a doc.

Any chance that you're also overweight?

[thewookie]

The age factor is all mental, you might need a waiver but if you have heart it don't matter.

The body odor; garbage in, garbage out if it's your azz that causing you the problems, get some Beeno or Gas-X and try changing what you eat. Man,, speaking of foul gas,,I had some super-smelly gas so bad last night that my dog wanted to go sleep outside,,, so I'm feeling you there... (I admit to having some mean nachos with anchovies and all the fixin's the night before) But if it's your BO that makes you so putrid then make sure you shower, and try using some better DO!

They could never disqualify you for BO, I mean you might catch some grief for it but nobody at boot camp is smelling very good, c'mon be real.

[Echo_Four_Bravo]

The odor problem is something that can be overcome. There is a problem, and the Lt. pointed out several possible causes. You don't say what type of odor it is- it could be breath, body odor, gas, or other things. I have a feeling you're talking about body odor. If that is the case, remember the odor isn't caused by sweat, but by bacteria. An antibacterial surgical scrub may be the answer for that problem.

[David Jameson]

No problem at all .

[David Jameson]

I have no problem with dog .He has a problem and wants some help.I DO have prolems understanding some of my stupid ass brother in arms that think they have to answer these nut jobs from L.A.

[Dog]

People say my backside smells like ****, or like a dog, ruff ruff. No, I'm not overweight. Doctors say they don't smell anything, it's all in my head they say. I eat chicken rice and beans, I know people say beans makes it worse, but people actually complain less if I eat beans. I've searched the internet, but nothing worked so far. I know it's funny what rVillac2 said, but it's true, people run away from me. I can never get into any lines.

[LeonardLawrence]

People say my backside smells like ****, or like a dog, ruff ruff. No, I'm not overweight. Doctors say they don't smell anything, it's all in my head they say. I eat chicken rice and beans, I know people say beans makes it worse, but people actually complain less if I eat beans. I've searched the internet, but nothing worked so far. I know it's funny what rVillac2 said, but it's true, people run away from me. I can never get into any lines.

Rice counteracts the beans somewhat if you eat them together. Try cutting out the beans and see if that helps.

If not, it is probably all in your head....

[Dog]

I'm really thankful for all of your comments. If you guys think I can go and I won't be a liability, then I'll start preparing to go to a recruiting office.

Thanks, Dog

[LeonardLawrence]

Dog,

Those of us with Medical Licenses rarely come to the board. We are busy, up to our elbows in peoples intestines. In fact I am in the middle of a triple bypass taking the time to answer this...

So I think you are spot on...

Check with your recruiter. Speak to him. Try not to act crazy about this and wash your ass before you go! Good luck and keep us updated. I am sure this is a question that will be asked repetitively in the future. ;)

Oh..darn...wrong clamp....um....I Have to go!,,,,,

[Dog]

Yes, sir, I'll let you guys know what happens,
Thanks, Dog

[Phantom Blooper]

Beano,GasEx,Irish Spring,Crest,Head & Shoulders,cologne.............

And make an appointment with a General Practioner and see if there is something medically wrong and if you need to be seen by specialists! :evilgrin:

[ssgtt32]

I'm ****ing speechless!

I couldn't agree more!

Maurice

[Dog]

Thanks for all the cool comments. I'll go back to the doctor and try to persuade him to send me to a gastroenterologist.

[chili77bowl]

Dear Chilli,

Grandma has just moved here from the old country and we've been feasting on some home cookin. I have noticed that people tend to respect my personal space a lot more these days. I never have a problem walking through busy sidewalks and people go out of their way to give me room in a crowded elevator. When I get to MCRD, will the DI's also respect my personal space?

On a related question, am I responsible for picking up the dead bugs that seem to always surround the area I am standing?

Sincerely,
Dog Breath

OH Bullsh*T! I ain't even attempting this one.
-Chili

[Marine84]

OK ....................now that I've quit laughing enough to type a response..............one of you a$$holes owes me a laptop and I don't care which one of you it is!

Chili, c'mon man, you mean we're going to have to tell him to write Dear Abby cause Chili wouldn't even touch it? Chili, you touch EVERYTHING man!

[semperfiman]

theres nothing wrong with you dog your just ****ing nuts

[chili77bowl]

seriously...I couldn't even BEGIN to answer this one...

alright, here I go with an attempt...

Dear I smell worse than fromunda cheese,

Buy stock in Degree deoderant. Take a bath in tomato juice, and for gods sake.... QUIT Bangin the skunks!

[Phantom Blooper]

one of you a$$holes owes me a laptop and I don't care which one of you it is!


Wasn't this the topic of this whole post?:evilgrin:

[tankmech]

Wow opening the dirty laundry bin........WHEW

[LeonardLawrence]

Thanks for all the cool comments. I'll go back to the doctor and try to persuade him to send me to a gastroenterologist.

Make an appointment with a gynecologist as well. If you need a referral for your insurance send me a PM.

Is it possible you were born as a woman and don't know it?

Chilli...its possible isn't it?

[Dog]

Hey, this is a serious problem.
Anyway, after thinking long and hard, I might not go. I'm not going because other new recruits would probably drop out because of me. They're going through a hard enough time withought me.
I might change my mind. I'll still prepare and take all your advice. I still have until the middle of this year to change.

[LeonardLawrence]

Hey, this is a serious problem.
Anyway, after thinking long and hard, I might not go. I'm not going because other new recruits would probably drop out because of me. They're going through a hard enough time withought me.
I might change my mind. I'll still prepare and take all your advice. I still have until the middle of this year to change.

:scared: Spoke to soon here.

Sorry Dog.

You can' t give up on yourself if this is your dream. Check into it, so you will know...or don't. It's your choice....but don't blame a bunch of strangers or your "issue" if you don't try.

[Phantom Blooper]

Hey, this is a serious problem.
Anyway, after thinking long and hard, I might not go. I'm not going because other new recruits would probably drop out because of me. They're going through a hard enough time withought me.
I might change my mind. I'll still prepare and take all your advice. I still have until the middle of this year to change.



Dog,

Yes this a serious problem.....for YOU! You came aboard and asked a question and labeled your topic Stinky Problem.

What do you expect harden Marines on this site to say? If you don't have the initiative to take care of this problem ......then it will effect your life and all social situations that you become involved in. If there is a problem with your health and welfare and the ozone ...get a grip and get it taken care of!


On the first post introducing yourself you tell Marines that you stink and you don't have a solution.....suck it up and read between the lines and weed out the sarcasm and do something. If you don't do anything and you mask the problem and enlist in any branch of the service expect to be messed with more.You could have done a better way of explaining your problem,besides telling the world that you stink!

You may have a medical problem or poor hygiene. If it's poor hygiene the Marine does not tolerate it and will be forced to be clean or they will clean you. If it is medical you need to do something about it. You owe it to yourself and to your family to find a solution to this problem.

:evilgrin:

[thewookie]

I couldn't have said it better myself, what do you expect?

[Dog]

Dog,

Yes this a serious problem.....for YOU! You came aboard and asked a question and labeled your topic Stinky Problem.

What do you expect harden Marines on this site to say? If you don't have the initiative to take care of this problem ......then it will effect your life and all social situations that you become involved in. If there is a problem with your health and welfare and the ozone ...get a grip and get it taken care of!


On the first post introducing yourself you tell Marines that you stink and you don't have a solution.....suck it up and read between the lines and weed out the sarcasm and do something. If you don't do anything and you mask the problem and enlist in any branch of the service expect to be messed with more.You could have done a better way of explaining your problem,besides telling the world that you stink!

You may have a medical problem or poor hygiene. If it's poor hygiene the Marine does not tolerate it and will be forced to be clean or they will clean you. If it is medical you need to do something about it. You owe it to yourself and to your family to find a solution to this problem.

:evilgrin:

You guys are right. I'm sorry, I deserve all of this.
I guess I never thought about what I expected to hear you guys say. It's not like I haven't been doing anything about it, I've been trying different things my whole life. Had I solved it earlier, then I would have gone earlier.
So, I'll go take care of my problems. I'll be back in a few months. I really appreciate all your time, help and comments. See you guys later.

[BR34]

I'm having a really hard time believing this kid is for real. I'm thinking troll v1.2.

[LeonardLawrence]

You guys are right. I'm sorry, I deserve all of this.
I guess I never thought about what I expected to hear you guys say. It's not like I haven't been doing anything about it, I've been trying different things my whole life. Had I solved it earlier, then I would have gone earlier.
So, I'll go take care of my problems. I'll be back in a few months. I really appreciate all your time, help and comments. See you guys later.

Just another great example of Stockholm Syndrome alive and well at Leatherneck.com

Good luck with your issue(s) Dog. Please come back and post and let us know what turns out. You may be able to help someone else...

[yellowwing]

And thus ends another chapter.