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thedrifter
12-24-06, 07:47 AM
Scrooge: A Man for Our Times
Written by Michael M. Bates
Monday, December 25, 2006

Christmastime is inevitably accompanied by allusions to Ebenezer Scrooge. As portrayed in Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol,” Ebenezer is a thoroughly disagreeable, curmudgeonly, miserly misanthrope. I sympathize. And not just because similar contentions are routinely made about me.

Enough is enough. It’s time to move on, as they say, from the conventional view of the man as “a squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous, old sinner! Hard and sharp as flint, from which no steel had ever struck out generous fire; secret, and self-contained, and solitary as an oyster.”

We as a society have come a long way in the 160 years since Dickens wrote his story. We’re kinder and gentler and infinitely more accepting. Ebenezer would be perceived much differently today.

Clearly, Scrooge was an at-risk child. His mother died giving him birth, probably because there wasn’t comprehensive national health care. The boy was shunted to a boarding school run by, alas, European males incapable of helping him get in touch with his feminine side.

That he was “secret, and self-contained, and solitary as an oyster” is another clue. We now understand such behavior as symptomatic of social anxiety disorder.

Seen this way, we realize that Ebenezer was himself society’s victim. Early intervention provided by comprehensive national health care may have helped him cast aside the shackles created by those not celebrating his diversity.

Moreover, there’s the possibility that still another factor contributed to Scrooge’s fragile emotional state:

“. . . old Scrooge sat busy in his counting-house. It was cold, bleak, biting weather: foggy withal: and he could hear the people in the court outside go wheezing up and down, beating their hands upon their breasts, and stamping their feet upon the pavement stones to warm them. The city clocks had only just gone three, but it was quite dark already--it had not been light all day: and candles were flaring in the windows of the neighbouring offices, like ruddy smears upon the palpable brown air.”

Perhaps Eb also suffered seasonal affective disorder (SAD.). In our enlightened age, SAD is increasingly recognized as a genuine mental condition.

The “palpable brown air” must also be a consideration when trying to understand Scrooge the man. Readers infer that he denied his clerk coal with which to stay warm because he was parsimonious. That’s a bad rap.

In truth, Mr. Scrooge was in the vanguard of the environmental movement. He sensed the dangers of burning fossil fuels and its impact on global warming. If he were around today, he’d probably have a lead in Al Gore’s movie.

Another indicator of how well Scrooge would fit into today’s society is his awareness of how best to help the disadvantaged. When do-gooders ask him for money “to buy the Poor some meat and drink and means of warmth,” his instant rejoinder is to look to the government rather than private charity for a solution.

Aren’t the prisons still in operation? he asks. The Union workhouses? Are the Treadmill and the Poor Law still in force? He’s already paying for those programs. It’s the government’s responsibility to care for the needy, not his.

Scrooge also is evidently troubled about too many humans depleting the earth’s resources. When told that some people would rather die than avail themselves of government programs, he replies: “If they would rather die, they had better do it, and decrease the surplus population.” Oprah, a zero population growth advocate, would approve and probably book him pronto.

Thoroughly modern Ebenezer does not impose his religious views, if he has any, on others. At no time does he--or any other character in the story--even mention the name of Jesus. The Reason for the Season is not, in accord with ACLU guidelines, suitable for dialogue. It’s too divisive and could offend some sensibilities.

Yes, Ebenezer Scrooge would fit right in today. He hasn’t changed. We have.

I trust I’ll not offend your sensibilities, dear reader, by wishing you a joyous Christmas as we commemorate the birth of our Savior.

This appeared in the December 21, 2006, Reporter Newspapers.

Ellie