Ed Palmer
03-05-06, 09:49 AM
Osama Bin Laden to open convenience stores in Iraq - anxiously awaits American pullout in '07
Osama Bin Laden has decided to open a string of convenience stores, to be called Fatwas R Us, and a string of cheap motels called Hostelges in Iraq and sell franchises while he anxiously awaits the departure of coalition forces currently stationed in the country in 2007. "We've taken over America with this plan, I see no reason why we can't take over Iraq using the same method" he said.
Correspondent and unbiased reporter Dan Rather reported this morning, in a story picked up from his trusted source, Al-Jazeera, the Bush Administration knew of this development months ago yet kept it from the American people. Rather bases his knowledge of this on someone he spoke to who knows someone who knows someone else who knows someone who thinks they might have maybe seen a memo somewhere regarding this development. "While we don't have the document, and aren't sure if it's real, I'm sure the story is". He wants to know what the President knew, and when he knew it.
Bin Laden described his business model which is simply to stop the jihad and the suicide bombings while awaiting the departure of coalition forces. "If we use all our young people to blow themselves up, who is going to man the counters and sell overpriced camel jerky to the unsuspecting masses?"
Osama Bin Laden has decided to open a string of convenience stores, to be called Fatwas R Us, and a string of cheap motels called Hostelges in Iraq and sell franchises while he anxiously awaits the departure of coalition forces currently stationed in the country in 2007. "We've taken over America with this plan, I see no reason why we can't take over Iraq using the same method" he said.
Correspondent and unbiased reporter Dan Rather reported this morning, in a story picked up from his trusted source, Al-Jazeera, the Bush Administration knew of this development months ago yet kept it from the American people. Rather bases his knowledge of this on someone he spoke to who knows someone who knows someone else who knows someone who thinks they might have maybe seen a memo somewhere regarding this development. "While we don't have the document, and aren't sure if it's real, I'm sure the story is". He wants to know what the President knew, and when he knew it.
Bin Laden described his business model which is simply to stop the jihad and the suicide bombings while awaiting the departure of coalition forces. "If we use all our young people to blow themselves up, who is going to man the counters and sell overpriced camel jerky to the unsuspecting masses?"