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Ed Palmer
01-28-06, 07:27 AM
News Is Stranger Than Fiction
Bloomington-Normal Pantagraph ^ | January 28, 2006 | Bill Flick


Posted on 01/28/2006 3:15:56 AM PST by Graybeard58


In Estacada, Ore., where doctor-assisted suicide is legal, a man's attempt at ending his life took a bizarre turn when he ingested a prescribed drug mixture from his doctor and said goodbye to his family, only to awaken from a coma three days later, feeling fine and asking, "What the hell happened? Why am I not dead?"

In Hereford, England, a couple celebrating their 80th wedding anniversary -- he's 105; she's only 100 -- attended a press conference where they attributed their success to his two words, "Yes, dear."

In Perrinton, Mich., a member of a family whose home's uncapped, 3-inch PVC roofline vent pipe led down to a toilet drain was surprised one morning to sit on a toilet and discover a squirrel looking up at her.

In Canada, because of deepening budget cuts, a suicide hot-line announced it could only accept calls weekdays from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

The victim of a party prank while severely intoxicated, a 39-year-old man in Portsmouth, N.H., finally sought help from a rescue squad to remove the padlock that had been locked around his scrotum for two weeks.

A man put a bucket of 8,200 pennies for sale on eBay for $25,000.

At the Livermore Library in San Francisco, where a colorful mosaic in the entryway floor commemorates 175 of the world's greats, the artist had to be recommissioned to come back and correct in the mosaic the spelling of 11 of the 175 names, including "Van Gough," "Shakespere," "Michaelangelo" and "Eistein."

In Benton Harbor, Mich., a woman admitted she walked through a riot-wracked neighborhood on a night of unrest and sold small rocks for $1 each and bigger ones for $5 so that African-American protesters would have something to throw at police.

In Bridgeport, Conn., a 29-year-old woman found to be having repeated sex with an 8-year-old playmate of her daughter's defended herself, saying he was the aggressor in the relationship, that he had ordered her to dump her adult boyfriend and she was simply going along.

Police in Athens, Tenn., were called after a husband became angered at the way his wife was mowing their lawn and was chasing her around the yard with a power chain-saw when officers finally arrived.

At a discount store in St. Petersburg, Fla., a 48-year-old dwarf, Molly Beavers, told authorities she was fired because she didn't smile enough. When she explained to a store manager it was because she suffered from partial face paralysis, she claims she then was told, "That is no excuse."

In London, because a typist accidentally left out the word "not" in a court verdict, a 38-year-old called before a judge a dozen times "for public inebriation," was ordered to stay drunk in public or face being jailed.

In Anderson, Ind., one day after a 57-year-old biking enthusiast celebrated the end of a 2,400-mile bike trip across America to show that heart bypass surgery couldn't stop him, he sat down and died of a heart attack.



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dgallagher
01-28-06, 10:39 AM
January 27, 2006 - Guy Marshall, The Evolving World

Leaders of the terrorist organizations Hamas, Hezbollah, Islamic Jihad, al Qaeda and the other radicals that use suicide bombers are alarmed at a new interpretation of Muhammad’s promise of 72 virgins for martyrs (shahid}. This radical change may alter the mid-east war and save Israel from more years of suffering.

It all hinges around the words from the Quran, Muhammad said about heaven.

The phrase's:
Gave them:
We Gave:
We gave him:

Remember, Arabic is read right to left.

According to two mullah’s, Seyyed Sorouri and Muhammad Moussavi in Shahr-e Babak and the small village of Khatoonabad, in Iran, martyrs are being misled. Muhammad’s "Hadith" (an Arabic word meaning traditions), promising 72 virgins for martyrs is from a statement by Muhammad someone ‘overheard’.
'The smallest reward for the people of paradise is an abode where there are 80,000 servants and 72 wives, over which stands a dome decorated with pearls, aquamarine, and ruby, as wide as the distance from Al-Jabiyah [a Damascus suburb] to Sana'a [Yemen]." He supposedly used the word “WakawaAAiba” which appears nowhere else in the Koran and signifies young full-breasted (mature) maidens of equal age.

The Mullahs interpretation is, “if you participate in un-holy or un-just war or harm innocent by-standers and women or children you do not receive these rewards but are destined to be one of the 72 virgins promised to the righteous.” This, of course puts a whole different slant on the idea of Jihad. You may become the boy-toy of some fat merchant you just blew up!

Mid Eastern news Al-Jazeera has made no mention of this in their news broadcasts.