thedrifter
12-23-05, 07:11 AM
Military families endure the holidays
Published Friday December 23 2005
By LORI YOUNT
The Beaufort Gazette
Nancy Bobrowski couldn't stand the thought of sending out a Christmas photo that didn't include her husband, Master Sgt. Rick Bobrowski, who is on a six-month deployment in Japan. So she doctored the scene of her and the three kids in front of the Christmas tree, tastefully placing a photo of her husband in Japan in the left corner.
"It reads 'Worlds apart, together in heart,'" Bobrowski said as she beamed at her creation with two toddlers whizzing around her legs in the kitchen of their new Laurel Bay home.
The house is decorated more with pictures of Rick Bobrowski than Christmas ornaments. A tapestry of photos that he sends from Japan hangs from the kitchen counter, low enough for Matthew, 3, and Julia, 2, to see.
Photos of their father flip by on the computer's screensaver, which they and their 16-year-old sister, Brittany Boettcher, can see while eating at the table.
The family did assemble a skinny Christmas tree near the front door, but they poured their hearts into decorating a smaller one to send to Rick Bobrowski with ornaments made from photographs of themselves.
"The hardest part about deployment is this time of year," she said, adding Rick's deployment in 2000 was January through July.
With more than 650 Marines based at Marine Corps Air Station Beaufort deployed overseas this holiday season, their
families try to cope with the absence of a loved one when others are celebrating being
together.
The number of spouses of deployed Marines seeking counseling increases right after the holidays, when they are realizing the disappointment of the season, said Regena Cooper, clinical counseling services branch head for all three Beaufort County bases.
"They have to be realistic about expectations," she said. "They have to acknowledge that empty place at the dinner table in a realistic way."
Families should try to keep traditions they have but acknowledge ones that can't be maintained with the loved one gone, Cooper
said.
Vicki Howe, whose husband, Staff Sgt. Scott Howe, has been in Iraq since July, is facing her first Christmas without him and said she didn't bother digging out and setting up the artificial tree.
"He's very particular about it," she said. "He's pretty particular about the lights. Every branch has to have a light."
Instead of traveling to Missouri or Maine to visit parents, Vicki Howe's parents are coming down to visit her, so she decorated a little for them.
"It'll probably be easier for me because I'll have my own space," she said.
She said she's not looking forward to her two-week vacation from her job as a kindergarten teacher at Elliott Elementary School on Laurel Bay, because keeping busy is how she keeps her mind off his absence.
"I think I'm fine, but then I see something on TV, and I didn't know it bothered me," Howe said. An advertisement with people clapping as troops walk through the airport got to her one day, she said.
For Melissa Latourelle and her 7-month-old, Cameron, Christmas is on hold until
Sgt. Keith Latourelle comes home from Japan in a few weeks.
However, festively wrapped packages spill out from beneath a tree brightly decorated with ornaments Melissa made, including one with Cameron's
handprint.
"I wanted to get more into it and not feel depressed," she said. "I was not going to put the tree up, but he said we have to."
Latourelle said they usually visit out-of-state relatives during the holidays, but she wasn't going to make the trip this year with the baby.
Cooper said Marine spouses may choose to stay home during the season for other reasons, too.
"They want to demonstrate their own strength," she said. "The Marine is showing strength. This shows their own support."
Bouncing Cameron on her knee while he contentedly chewed on a teething ring, Latourelle said she'll dress him up in a Santa suit for the Christmas morning they'll hold when her husband
returns.
"It's harder on (Keith)," she said of the deployment. "When he left, the baby was 9 weeks old."
She said she tries to videotape Cameron's "firsts," and though she's sad Keith misses them, she's glad Cameron isn't old enough to miss his father.
"My biggest fear is that he'll be afraid of his dad," she said, chuckling.
Tanesia Belvin said her husband, Sgt. Lamont Belvin, who has been deployed in Iraq since July, also hates missing the firsts of their nearly year-old daughter, Lynnesia, who started taking her first steps last Thursday.
"Her crawling and walking -- you want a husband to enjoy that with you," Belvin said.
Unlike the other wives who decided to stay home when they usually travel during the holidays with their husbands, Belvin decided time would go by faster if she visited her family in Michigan, though she usually just stays home with her husband of more than six years.
"Every spot in the house, I can picture him," she said. "His presence is all over the house."
Having Lynnesia with her is a comfort to her and their families, though.
"It's part of him we can all share together," she said.
Ellie
Published Friday December 23 2005
By LORI YOUNT
The Beaufort Gazette
Nancy Bobrowski couldn't stand the thought of sending out a Christmas photo that didn't include her husband, Master Sgt. Rick Bobrowski, who is on a six-month deployment in Japan. So she doctored the scene of her and the three kids in front of the Christmas tree, tastefully placing a photo of her husband in Japan in the left corner.
"It reads 'Worlds apart, together in heart,'" Bobrowski said as she beamed at her creation with two toddlers whizzing around her legs in the kitchen of their new Laurel Bay home.
The house is decorated more with pictures of Rick Bobrowski than Christmas ornaments. A tapestry of photos that he sends from Japan hangs from the kitchen counter, low enough for Matthew, 3, and Julia, 2, to see.
Photos of their father flip by on the computer's screensaver, which they and their 16-year-old sister, Brittany Boettcher, can see while eating at the table.
The family did assemble a skinny Christmas tree near the front door, but they poured their hearts into decorating a smaller one to send to Rick Bobrowski with ornaments made from photographs of themselves.
"The hardest part about deployment is this time of year," she said, adding Rick's deployment in 2000 was January through July.
With more than 650 Marines based at Marine Corps Air Station Beaufort deployed overseas this holiday season, their
families try to cope with the absence of a loved one when others are celebrating being
together.
The number of spouses of deployed Marines seeking counseling increases right after the holidays, when they are realizing the disappointment of the season, said Regena Cooper, clinical counseling services branch head for all three Beaufort County bases.
"They have to be realistic about expectations," she said. "They have to acknowledge that empty place at the dinner table in a realistic way."
Families should try to keep traditions they have but acknowledge ones that can't be maintained with the loved one gone, Cooper
said.
Vicki Howe, whose husband, Staff Sgt. Scott Howe, has been in Iraq since July, is facing her first Christmas without him and said she didn't bother digging out and setting up the artificial tree.
"He's very particular about it," she said. "He's pretty particular about the lights. Every branch has to have a light."
Instead of traveling to Missouri or Maine to visit parents, Vicki Howe's parents are coming down to visit her, so she decorated a little for them.
"It'll probably be easier for me because I'll have my own space," she said.
She said she's not looking forward to her two-week vacation from her job as a kindergarten teacher at Elliott Elementary School on Laurel Bay, because keeping busy is how she keeps her mind off his absence.
"I think I'm fine, but then I see something on TV, and I didn't know it bothered me," Howe said. An advertisement with people clapping as troops walk through the airport got to her one day, she said.
For Melissa Latourelle and her 7-month-old, Cameron, Christmas is on hold until
Sgt. Keith Latourelle comes home from Japan in a few weeks.
However, festively wrapped packages spill out from beneath a tree brightly decorated with ornaments Melissa made, including one with Cameron's
handprint.
"I wanted to get more into it and not feel depressed," she said. "I was not going to put the tree up, but he said we have to."
Latourelle said they usually visit out-of-state relatives during the holidays, but she wasn't going to make the trip this year with the baby.
Cooper said Marine spouses may choose to stay home during the season for other reasons, too.
"They want to demonstrate their own strength," she said. "The Marine is showing strength. This shows their own support."
Bouncing Cameron on her knee while he contentedly chewed on a teething ring, Latourelle said she'll dress him up in a Santa suit for the Christmas morning they'll hold when her husband
returns.
"It's harder on (Keith)," she said of the deployment. "When he left, the baby was 9 weeks old."
She said she tries to videotape Cameron's "firsts," and though she's sad Keith misses them, she's glad Cameron isn't old enough to miss his father.
"My biggest fear is that he'll be afraid of his dad," she said, chuckling.
Tanesia Belvin said her husband, Sgt. Lamont Belvin, who has been deployed in Iraq since July, also hates missing the firsts of their nearly year-old daughter, Lynnesia, who started taking her first steps last Thursday.
"Her crawling and walking -- you want a husband to enjoy that with you," Belvin said.
Unlike the other wives who decided to stay home when they usually travel during the holidays with their husbands, Belvin decided time would go by faster if she visited her family in Michigan, though she usually just stays home with her husband of more than six years.
"Every spot in the house, I can picture him," she said. "His presence is all over the house."
Having Lynnesia with her is a comfort to her and their families, though.
"It's part of him we can all share together," she said.
Ellie