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thedrifter
07-06-05, 06:51 AM
Deployed couple forced to stay apart
July 6, 2005
Central Ohio.

A National Guard soldier deployed to Iraq has complained to her congressman about a policy that prohibits any sexual contact, even hand-holding, with her husband, who is assigned to the same unit and deployed with her.

In a letter to Rep. Ben Chandler, D-Ky., Sgt. Amanda McCormick said she and her husband of six months are not asking to live together.
“The only thing that we are asking for is a few hours, here and there, of privacy,” she wrote in a June 22 letter. She said she fears if she and her husband are caught in the same room alone, they could be punished under the Uniform Code of Military Justice.

“We are stationed on the same base, in the same unit. Instead of that fact being comforting, it has made us sick with worry,” she wrote. “We are not allowed to live together. We are not allowed to spend time alone with each other. Basically, in a nutshell, we are not allowed to be married.”

Neither Amanda McCormick nor her husband, Staff Sgt. Todd McCormick, could be reached for comment.

Chandler’s office is looking into the issue, said his spokeswoman Jennifer Spalding.

Amanda McCormick said her husband was visiting in her living quarters June 22 on a rare “down day” when her commander knocked on the door with a question. The couple immediately answered the door, both in uniform, with the lights on. But according to Amanda McCormick, the commander said, “’That doesn’t look very good on you two. He needs to leave,”’ referring to her husband.

Amanda McCormick is in the 940th Military Police Company, a Guard unit from Walton, Ky. The commander, 1st Lt. Brandon McNeese, issued a “no contact” policy May 3 relating to physical contact between soldiers.

The policy also addresses married couples. “Dual-military couples deployed in the (Central Command Area of Responsibility) are prohibited from sexual contact, handholding or kissing,” McNeese wrote.

“Sexual relationships between soldiers in a unit have the potential to negatively affect morale, readiness and good order and discipline of a unit during a deployment,” McNeese wrote.

He referred questions to a public affairs officer in theater, but no further information was available.

A spokeswoman at Central Command headquarters in Tampa, Fla., said the command has no policy of its own on sexual contact between married couples.

“It’s up to the individual services,” said Army Pfc. Elena Chacon.
Amanda McCormick pointed to a seemingly conflicting policy issued by Col. James Brown, commander of the 18th Military Police Brigade, on Dec. 26, stating, “sexual intercourse or other sexual relations between individuals who are not married to each other are prohibited while deployed.”

The brigade policy does not mention married couples.
Both the company and brigade restrictions do not apply when soldiers are on authorized leave.

How many military couples in the Iraq and Afghanistan war zones are in the same situation as the McCormicks is unknown.

“Commanders institute policies based on their assessments of possible effects to unit morale and discipline, as well as the availability and type of housing,” said Army spokeswoman Maj.

Elizabeth Robbins. “The Army is both pro-family and pro-discipline, and commanders determine how to support both when the two may be at odds.”

In at least three cases, service members who died in Iraq have had a spouse serving in theater.

Defense Department policy does not prohibit married couples from being assigned to the same unit or ship, but the services’ policies vary.

For instance, the Navy bars married sailors from permanent assignments on the same ship or the same shipboard-deployable command, such as a carrier wing. They must get special permission from a commanding officer to serve in a shore command in which both sailors report to the same supervisor. But the Marine Corps places no restrictions on deploying both members of a dual-military couple, even to a hostile fire area, whether they’re both Marines or of different services, said 2nd Lt. Brian Donnelly, a Marine Corps spokesman.

“Mission is paramount, and we have the authority and discretion to deploy both concurrently, may deploy both concurrently to a designated hostile fire area, and may even deploy both concurrently to the same ship or same unit within a hostile fire area,” Donnelly said.

As far as physical contact, the Marine Corps does not allow public displays of affection such as kissing and holding hands while in uniform.

The Army’s policy leaves decisions about accommodations for deployed married couples to individual commands.


Ellie

You are there to do a job, not be on vacation;)

marinefamily5
07-06-05, 07:04 AM
Myself if they're married I don't see anything wrong with, because I know I would not deal with someone telling me I couldn't have alittle alone time with my wife. That is just me.

KingDonkeyPunch
07-06-05, 08:30 AM
We had a married couple in my old unit, and they deployed together with us to the middle east. They did have to stay in seperate hooches, but they were allowed to spend all the time they wanted to together, as long as it didn't affect their duties. No one in the unit really was bothered by them being together either. I really think that this is crap, but the CO makes more money than me, and probably had a justifiable reason for his decision.

yellowwing
07-06-05, 08:44 AM
That's crap, going outside of your chain of cammand to write your congressman.

They could have just adapted and improvised. I'm sure that their LT would have cut them a lot of slack as long as it wasn't too obvious. He's got plenty more concerns than being on the hand holding police.

marinefamily5
07-06-05, 09:46 AM
I sometimes think that officers don't care about anything except what they want. they want it they have the shinny stuff they can do it. it is called power trippin. but I would tell you this i wouldn't let some guy that puts his pants on the same as i do tell me i can't see my wife.