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thedrifter
05-20-05, 12:38 AM
Who the (Expletive) Am I?

May 19, 2005

by Tom Purcell

Boy, you talk about incivility in politics these days.

I got home late a few weeks ago and checked my e-mail. I had a note from woodhouse@americansforsocialsecurity.com. Brad Woodhouse, apparently, communications director for Americans United for Social Security, had sent me an e-mail.

I smelled a rat.

I get several e-mails a week from woodhouse@americansforsocialsecurity.com. Though the group portrays itself as a national coalition of Democrats, Republicans and Independents united “to protect the most successful retirement program in our nation's history,” its real name should be “Democrats Out to Get Bush.”

After all, two prominent Democrats -- Steve Hildebrand, a Democratic campaign veteran and Paul Tewes, former political director of the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee (DSCC) -- have lead roles at the Americans United group. And prior to his current job, Woodhouse was the spokesperson for the DSCC.

I opened the e-mail to see a column credited to Mark Mellman, another Democratic campaign veteran. The column said President Bush’s attempt to “cut Social Security for 70% of Americans” could be compared to Napoleon’s disastrous attempt to invade Russia. It said Bush had lost the Social Security debate and that Democrats and “pro Social Security” groups had won.

Agitated, I decided to write back.

It’s worth noting at this point that I’d enjoyed a few pints at the pub earlier that evening. As the fine Irish brew percolated through my system, here is what I wrote:

“You and your party have no ideas, no courage, no guts, nothing to offer anyone or anything, if this piece of propaganda you sent out is what you believe. You lie and exploit the old and the feeble in order to scare and cloud and confuse… You are a wart on the heel of a foot that is struggling to move forward.”

A wart on the heel of a foot that is struggling to move forward? OK, I may have had a few snorts of whiskey with those pints.

“… Were a Democratic president looking to face down this [Social Security] problem, you'd be shouting an entirely different message, wouldn't you? You care not for truth in any way. You care not either for anything that benefits the good people of this country -- only what benefits your paying clients, who happen to be Democrats.”

My blood was really pumping now. I felt the sweet indignation a girl must know when she says to her ex-boyfriend, “You are sooooo immature!”

“I trust and hope the good American people will see through your lies,” I continued, “and most of them will, but you know that it is the old and the feeble and the tired who you seek to scare… I don't know how you sleep at night.”

Ah, the old “I don’t know how you sleep at night” closer. Satisfied with my diatribe, I fired off the e-mail, then fell into a deep, peaceful sleep.

The next morning, I had an e-mail response from woodhouse@americansforsocialsecuritycom. I don’t know if it was actually Woodhouse or some other staffer, but apparently it was he.

Did he send additional information to strengthen his points? Perhaps he sought to demonstrate the weakness of my argument? Or maybe he had a good laugh over my pint-induced indignation?

Nope. His response was short and sweet and left me stunned:

“Who the (expletive that rhymes with ‘truck’) are you and why do I care?”

Sheesh. I know things have got heated in Washington, but I had no idea they’d sunk so low.

My mother says that if anyone needs to use such language to make his point, then his argument must be weak, and that is true.

Maybe it's because Democrats have no fresh ideas on Social Security that they demagogue (and cuss). Maybe they think their best hope at winning back power in 2006 is to misinform, rather than engage in honest debate.

I always thought Democrats were for the little guy, but I guess the only little guys they’re really for are the ones they can scare into voting for them.

But then who the (expletive) am I and why should you care?

Tom Purcell

Ellie