Help Wanted

[CAS3]

Personal Bodyguard wanted to protect former WM from DC area sniper. Must have a bullet proof vest and have your own weapon. Clean driving record (as mine sucks now). Please send resume and photo to e-mail address.
:marine:

[Shaffer]

By saying "must have own weapon", you mean it must be a male.

LMAO!

SF,
Jerry

[mrbsox]

... weapons are FORBIDDEN in our Nations Capitol.

Makes a lot of sense.... don't it. The only guns in our Nations Capitol (2nd Amendment and all) are BANNED :cry:

But I'll be there next week, if'n you want an escort somplace.

But.... I want WODON's permission to let you show me around town !!!! :banana:

Terry

[CAS3]

Gerald,
I was referring to a side arm, rifle, semi automatic type of weapon.

MRBSOX:
I will be out of town from the 28 OCT 02 until 11 NOV 02. I am going to Okinawa to be with my husband. I would be happy to show you around before then. Don't worry about WODON, He knows I can handle myself. If someone tries anything funny, he will be on the first plane home!!

[thedrifter]

Well you wanted your own personal body guard......Now you can explain to your hubbie, why you keep asking me to send you Nick...........LOL.........

Sempers,

Roger


http://cagefactor.com/images/nic_pic_18_large.jpg


http://cagefactor.com/images/nic_pic_12_large.jpg


http://cagefactor.com/images/nic_pic_25_large.jpg


Sempers,

Roger

[CAS3]

THANK YOU
THANK YOU
THANK YOU


Don is well aware of my feelings for NICK!!
I don't think he is insecure about these fantasies of mine!:banana:

[Red Dragon]

This Red dragon for Hire. Has own built in armor and lethal weapon. Can char anything up to 100 yards in a flash.

The Red Dragon

[Spiderman]

Any time you need an escort, just call and I'll swing on by.

Heck, I might need to spend the night with you. You know to make sure you are secured, and tucked in at night. No need for riding around in a cab. I could wrap you in my web for safe keeping.


Some women like to be tied up like that.

[House Mouse]

I ain't scared of no body!

I'll take care of you!

Pick me!

I'll watch your front and your butt, I mean your behind, I mean your six.

[Sixguns]

Are you saying you need an escort? Have you looked in the yellow pages for an escort? I'm not sure what the going rates are, so you may want to get some info on that.

P.S. I have a weapon and flak vest. My question is what will you be wearing for protection?

[Sparrowhawk]

Here are my Escort Qualifications

<EMBED SRC="http://www.ilovewavs.com/Effects/Animals/Tiger.wav"Hidden="FALSE" AutoStart="TRUE" Volume="75" Loop="FALSE" Height="24" Border="0" Width="145" Controls="SmallConsole">





http://cookbarela.bizland.com/eyes.gif

My name's Cook Barela, Marine, retired LAPD officer. and still carry several weapons. Blood kin to the grizzy that bit General Westmoreland's ass!


I was born on Veterans Day, cause my papa got horny on Valentine’s Day.

My grandma has drank more whisky than there is in all of Kentucky, My grandpa rode lightening bolts every year in New Mexico for the 4th of July fireworks show and I was there in Oklahoma when they hung the jerk, who invented work.

I can fart a fireball high into the sky, my skin is tougher than a desert tortoise, and I have peed in the Rio Grande and the Mississippi at the same time.

I've ridden the mule that kicked holes in the sky, and shook off its saddle. I’ve slept with slavering wolves, and shared a meal with lion’s in caves as dark as hell’s back door. I have mean black panthers eyes and have clobbered bark off a gum tree faster than the biggest brown bear in North Dakota.

I'm half horse, half gator, with panther, tiger, jungle cat, jackal and hyena thrown in and have a touch of California earthquakes in my head.

I have danced with the prettiest women, and have the fastest goat, and ugliest dog this side of hell.

I can out-jump, out-run, out-eat, throw down, drag out and whip any man in all New York City.

I ain't never seen them, but my common sense tells me the Andes is but foothills compared to the jungles of Nam. The Alps are for old women and children to climb in comparison.

The deep sea is where God has done he's finest sculpturing and I aim to visit them next times I goes swimming.

I knows that there ain't no asylums for crazy Marines! And there ain't no churches except right here on this here site. There ain't no priests excepting squawking Blue Jays.

I am a Vietnam Marine Machine Gunner, sing in the shower, don't wear skivvies and I'll live until a woman breaks my heart or a bullet finds me and there ain't no laws for brave Marines!

[JAMarine]

Sorry CAS but I've got to ask the question;

Hey Barela - I gotta ask ;

"I can fart a fireball high into the sky"

You gotta teach me this one Bro.

************************************************** ***********

CAS;
You just give me a call when you need an escort. I may not be able to Fart Fireballs but I'm here for ya.

:marine:

[Sparrowhawk]

Buy the biggest Pinto beans you can find and place in a small pot.

Top with Jalepano chilies that have been merinated in Garlic salt and Nuoc Cham sauce. Mix in some chedder cheese, two hard boiled eggs and two onions.

Cook over a slow flame for 4 hours without once opening the lid. Removed the pot from heat, insert straw in the lid opening while inhaling slowly and deep for as long as you can stand it.

Run outdoors, drop pants and allow nature to take its course.

Not recommend during adverse weather, earthquakes or during helicopter fly-overs.



WARNING

BRITNEY SMEARS TRIED IT ONCE, with only small pinto beans....

http://www.farts.com/cgi-bin/ubb/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=11;t=000009;p=

[CAS3]

That was an awesome resume. However, I can not accept it as you are on the other coast.
A question: which part is half horse????:D

Bruce...I am looking for a bodyguard. Not an escort. I am well aware of the difference. Besides, I don't have that kinda cash laying around!
Were you offering your services for free?

Spiderman/Housemouse/Red Dragon
Cook you are too funny. SYBILL doesn't compare!:lick:

[wrbones]

Cut Sparrowhawk some slack! Ya gots to allow a man his illusions! LOL

[Red Dragon]

CAS3, all you have to ask and there will be help available for you. Just look at all the offers that you have received. Marines protect their own. By the way , my range has increased to 200 yards in a split second. Fire all the way.

The Red Dragon

[Sparrowhawk]

The shooter has not targeted young good looking women in their teenage years. So keep dressing young the way you do and you'll be alright.

LMAO




http://cookbarela.bizland.com/cas1.gif

[CAS3]

Payback for letting the "dragon" out of the bag, huh?

Damn I look good on someone else's body!:yes:

[Sparrowhawk]

No, the Dragon is not I.... LMAo


But I do want to thank you for clarifying that picture, and thank you at the same time for the new pic you send me, that shows me what you really look like... LMAO


http://cookbarela.bizland.com/cas3.gif

[CAS3]

MY BOOBS ARE BETTER THAN HERS.

[Sparrowhawk]

here's the picture you send me... Thanks


LMAO


http://netmemes.org/images/ATT04401.jpeg

[Red Dragon]

Cas, I never was in a bag, just always in hiding until called upon to help. Always on the alert for females in distress LOL

Sparrowhawk, thanks for the show, helped make my day. LMAO

The Red Dragon