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View Full Version : How to know when a Marine has been to your house...



femalemarine_89
01-04-05, 09:18 PM
The question is.. How do you know a Marine has been in the house??


All the boots under the bed are shined....LOL

femalemarine_89
01-04-05, 09:34 PM
gees yall.. no sence of humor tonight or what??

Toby M
01-04-05, 09:41 PM
Funny you should mention that because I did a double check and you are so right!!! My work boots are still nice and shiney (and I retired over a year a a half ago), dress shoes, nice and shiney...it's a curse I tell you!

femalemarine_89
01-04-05, 09:44 PM
Yeah it is.. Guys at my husbands work were picking on him about that.. Saying that all his boots should be nice and shiney being married to a Marine and all... LOL.. I told him that I would shine theirs too but for some of them it would be 55 bucks per boot and for the others only 50 per boot :))

TracGunny
01-04-05, 10:13 PM
... the G.I. cans shine brighter than when new...

TracGunny
01-04-05, 10:14 PM
...all the books in the bookshelf are covered and aligned...

TracGunny
01-04-05, 10:15 PM
...all bright-work in the house is shined...

femalemarine_89
01-04-05, 10:16 PM
LOL... Dont you mean if they are all in binders?? Oh wait a minute that is the NAVY.. ROFLMAO.. they make sure everything that is in sight is in a BINDER.. go figure.. No help for the Navy..

TracGunny
01-04-05, 10:17 PM
...all ghost-turds have dissapeared from under all funiture...

femalemarine_89
01-04-05, 10:19 PM
ROFLMAO.. you are too much tonight Gunny.. Gonna make me laugh so hard i might fall off the chair.. and since i bashed on the Navy I know my husband wont help me up :))

femalemarine_89
01-04-05, 10:50 PM
Here is another good one for yall.
A Marine goes to a comfort inn for the night, walks in and asks for a room. The hotel manager tells the Marine that the only room he has is to share with a Sailor. The Marine says that he will take it. The manager says that he has to warn him that the Sailor snores very loud and keeps everyone in the area awake. The Marine said he didnt care and that he would take the room anyways..

The Marine walks into the room and walks over to the sailor and gives him a kiss on the cheek and says good night sweetheart.

The next morning the Marine walks into the office to return his key and the Manager asks him how he slept lastnight and the Marine replied that it was one of the best that he has had. The manager asked him how that could be with the snoring sailor. The Marine replied that he walked in and gave him a kiss on the cheek and he was awake all night watching the Marine..

femalemarine_89
01-04-05, 11:02 PM
yall dont think these are funny.. Well hell I guess I am going to have to try harder.. SIGH..

greensideout
01-04-05, 11:02 PM
" How to know when a Marine has been to your ho"?

Come on! Is that a lead-in or what?----LMAO

femalemarine_89
01-04-05, 11:04 PM
ROFLMAO

greensideout
01-04-05, 11:08 PM
:D

femalemarine_89
01-04-05, 11:17 PM
All I can say is leave it to you green..

Sgt. Smitty
01-05-05, 12:16 PM
sailors beware of midnight Marines............LMAO Good one Tammy

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 12:17 PM
:D.. glad it got someones attention.. I have alot of them just wait to see how they are taken before i send out anymore.. LOL

Sgt. Smitty
01-05-05, 12:23 PM
These are better than blonde jokes............

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 12:26 PM
LOL.. yeah my sister dont like me to tell blonde jokes.. I always tease her that we must be adopted as everyone in our family have dark brown/black hair and she is a blonde and I am a redhead.. figure that oen out..

Sgt. Smitty
01-05-05, 12:32 PM
Got 3 boys, me and their mom are both brunettes, one has brown hair, one has blondeish, guess you'd call it dishwater blonde and the other is a redhead. kinda like the dogs of today, we're just an all American breed.........LOL You sure in a good mood this mornin 89

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 12:34 PM
yeah I try to be in a good mood.. Its too damn cold here for anything else.. Im freezing my a** off. Bundled up in my pt sweats and still cold.. no running for me this morning.. LOL

Sgt. Smitty
01-05-05, 12:39 PM
Whattup MARINE? A little cold weather gonna make a sissy out of ya? Get the lead out jarhead and get you behind on the PT course, double time.................LMAO

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 12:40 PM
HELL NO.... I have been out in it the last week and not going to get sick over it.. SO BITE ME... ROFLMAO

JAG5150
01-05-05, 12:43 PM
89, guess that you get it from all sides, your sisters blonde, no blonde jokes, your husband is a sailor, no navy jokes. It's a good thing that you're surrounded by Marines, anything goes in here.

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 12:46 PM
Hell I am always telling Navy jokes to my husband.. He laughes it off cause when he goes to work he hears all about Marines.. They tease him all the time..

JAG5150
01-05-05, 12:50 PM
Besides what can he do, you already told us yesterday that he's scared of you. I guess that he has to be pretty smart.

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 12:52 PM
Yeah he is.. When he was going thru Chief Initiation and had to PT.. I was PTing him like crazy.. Everynight he had to drop and do pushups. I think I got him up to doing 100 a night and he had to do sit ups as well.. He lost in 7 weeks he lost 32 lbs.. LOL

Sgt. Smitty
01-05-05, 12:55 PM
Fine job, fine job.........but if i bite ya are you gonna like it? LMFAO

JAG5150
01-05-05, 12:55 PM
Nothing like that Ole Marine Corps spirit to get you motivated ar at least a Marine Corps Gunnery Sgt.

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 12:58 PM
but you have to be able to catch me before you can bite me Smitty.. Hey Jag someone has to get these sailors into shape.. It makes me so sick when I go to a navy base and their bellies dunloped over their belts. Makes me sick. I asked my husband if they PT at all and he says no they dont make it manditory. I told them that they need to cause some of those rollie pollies you could roll down a hill and they would never return. Its just nasty to see it.

JAG5150
01-05-05, 12:59 PM
All right here we go. What do you call a Navy Chief who is afraid of a U.S.M.C. Gunnery Sgt.?

89's Husband

LOL

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 01:02 PM
LMFAO.. thats him most of the time.. LOL.. Heck what is even funnier to watch is my little brother.. He took wrestling in school and he is alot bigger than I am and everytime I go home to visit he is like I can take you down.. I tell him to go ahead and try and he is the one that always ends up on his back. He says "sis how did you do that, I was in wrestling and I should be the one with you on the ground?" I told him that I was in the Corps and there is no other explination needed.

Sgt. Smitty
01-05-05, 01:07 PM
GOOD ONE JAG..........bout fell off my chair on that one. Your lil bro should learn that you can't win when you fight against experience 89.......and as for catchin ya, think you may be able to outrun me now.............LOL

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 01:09 PM
lol.. well might not run all that fast :P.. hehehe.. yeah he got me good on that one.. I will have to send that email to my hubs at work :))

Sgt. Smitty
01-05-05, 01:12 PM
this is gonna be another one of those days, i can see it comin already..........LOL

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 01:12 PM
yeah you started it Smitty.. hehehe now I am on your tail.

JAG5150
01-05-05, 01:14 PM
My older brother is 6 years older than me, he was in the army, we hadn't seen each other since before I had gotten out of High school until my grandfathers funeral. We hung out for a couple of days and ended up bashing each others branch. We ended up wrestling and I pounded him Of cousre I'm about 3 inches taller and 40 lbs heavier that he is now but he still wanted to go and said remember who the master is. After we finished I looked at him and said wno's the master now b!*%h/

JAG5150
01-05-05, 01:15 PM
As long as you finish it 89 it's all gonna be good

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 01:16 PM
lol@jag.. I always finish what i start..

JAG5150
01-05-05, 01:18 PM
Promises promises, I just don't know if I can finish. What the hell I'll sure try, I never fell behibn and I don't expect to start now.
Semper Fi do or die

JAG5150
01-05-05, 01:19 PM
behind, can't spell either

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 01:20 PM
ROFLMAO.. thats the attitude to have there Jag..

JAG5150
01-05-05, 01:22 PM
Besides you know as well as I do it is extremely cold out if I don't keep up I might freeze.

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 01:23 PM
Yeah well its soo damn cold and its even colder up here in the office. Dumb how the heat duct is right over the garage and we get nothing but the cold air from the garage in my office.

JAG5150
01-05-05, 01:26 PM
What do you call a sailor with an I.Q. of 100?
Married to a Marine.

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 01:30 PM
Hey Now I like that one.. I am going to have to send that to my hubs at work :))

JAG5150
01-05-05, 01:41 PM
I origionally heard that by a sailor but it went like this, What do you call a Marine withan I.Q. of 100?
A platoon.
It's funny now but at the time I had been drinking with 3 other Marines, we took exception to it. Unfortunately we were in a navy bar and out numbered about 8 to 1. We did O.K. for about 5 minutes. If we would have had another 4 Marines it would have turned out differently.

Sparrowhawk
01-05-05, 02:17 PM
Originally posted by femalemarine_89
The question is.. How do you know a Marine has been in the house??



The toilet has a sign placed over it.
Please lift lid when finished.

JAG5150
01-05-05, 03:08 PM
How do you know when a female Marine has been in your HO, I mean house?
When you no longer have to Iron your own uniform.

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 03:41 PM
ROFLMAO@Jag.. I will be damned if I will iron those candy ass navy uniforms..

JAG5150
01-05-05, 03:44 PM
I never said any about any navy uniforms, do you even iron bell bottoms?
I was talking about a crisp pressed BDU that you could cut somebody with.

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 03:46 PM
I know what you are talking about. Actually being a Chief he wears the Khakies.. They have so many different types so he was advised to get the ones that are wash and wear.. but lets say he dont just wash and wear them.. HE IRONS THEM.. I will not let him to go work looking like chit.

JAG5150
01-05-05, 03:47 PM
Leave it to a Marine to straighten out the navy.

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 03:48 PM
OH AND BY THE WAY.. HAPPPPPPPPPPPPYYYYYYYYY BIRTHDAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY JAG..

JAG5150
01-05-05, 03:51 PM
Thank you very much, just one more that I survived. Now I have another year to get through.

JAG5150
01-05-05, 03:53 PM
Everybody needs to go pay respects to Sgt. Hauser (RIP)

TracGunny
01-05-05, 05:51 PM
Originally posted by femalemarine_89
The question is.. How do you know a Marine has been in the house??


All the boots under the bed are shined....LOL ..and covered & aligned, as well as all footwear in all closets

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 07:43 PM
Now I wasnt going to go into all that detail.. The shined boots was warning enough.. LOL

Eaglestrikes
01-05-05, 09:50 PM
Every damned can of food is aligned by size, content, and brand, and theres an inventory list next to it.
There is an EGA bigger than the wall hung on it.
The Forks, Knives and Spoons go from left to right.

femalemarine_89
01-05-05, 11:08 PM
LOL.. yup sounds like a Marines house to me.. LOL






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Sgt. Smitty
01-06-05, 12:49 PM
Yo Gunny, TracGunny that is.....you forgot that the head is so clean that you can drink from the toilet like my Platoon Commander used to do every Friday during inspection.

JAG5150
01-06-05, 12:51 PM
Nothing like a good old fashion field day.

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 01:11 PM
Oh I remember those days.. I can remember the white glove, on the top of the shower rod, on top of the doors, under the microwave, under the fridge, on top of the mirrors.. OH YEAH I REMEMBER.......





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yellowwing
01-06-05, 01:12 PM
How to know when a Marine has been to your house...All the beer in your fridge are in perfect cover and alignment! :)

JAG5150
01-06-05, 01:14 PM
Wrong, that I'll disagree with you on maybe all of the empty long necks are in cover and alignment.

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 01:14 PM
no yellow that isnt right.. You know a Marine has been to your house when there is no beer left..




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Sgt. Smitty
01-06-05, 01:22 PM
Got that one right Tammy

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 01:24 PM
thats more like the right one there Jag.. Yeah smitty I remember when I use to go thru so much beer OMG.. I wonder to this day how much would i have had if i didnt spend it on alcohol.. but then again what else was there to do on the weekend and not get into trouble for..



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Sgt. Smitty
01-06-05, 01:30 PM
I know huh, it's amazing just how much beer is consumed by the military, not to mention other things, like in Nam. I'm really surprised that i didn't become a full-blown alcoholic during my 7 years in the Crotch. Dam, these sites are bringin words outa my mouth that haven't been spoken in 30 years, except for Damned Gooks............. Mornin 89...........I'm on your 6 today........

JAG5150
01-06-05, 01:30 PM
In my experiences the alcohol caused me more trouble than if I had left it alone but what the hell, it was fun.

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 01:33 PM
Yeah it was alot of fun.. But it also got me into trouble a few times.. Lets just say my ex will never mess with me :))





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Sgt. Smitty
01-06-05, 01:35 PM
Shame on you girlfriend.................

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 01:43 PM
Yeah yeah yeah.. I know but lets just say he has never messed with me since.. Lets just say one of the dumbest things you can do is be sleeping with the neighbor and let your significant other walk in on it.. Expecially when you have a house full of weapons.. And knowing that she knows how to use each and every one.. LOL..


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JAG5150
01-06-05, 01:47 PM
Hey Smitty maybe we can get Tammy drunk again and see if she's blowing smoke or really out of control.
And a good time was had by all.
LOL

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 02:04 PM
Oh trust me.. My husband will tell you.. When I moved to florida with him he found out. Lets just say I will never drink everclear again.. that stuff makes you crazy... and let alone to drink it straight.




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femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 02:05 PM
Oh by the way Jag.. I got a call from the shop yesterday about my truck.. They found more problems from when it was broken into so I probably wont see it till Friday. they had to fix something inside the door, and they had to blend in the front quarter panel and all.. SO they were painting the front quarter panel and the back door yesterday..



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JAG5150
01-06-05, 02:14 PM
Well first things first, everclear, you may as well have been drinking JP-4 and when you get your truck back just put some of that everclear in it, it'll be a great octane booster.
Secondly don't let them rip you off, they always find something to jack up the prices.

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 02:20 PM
Oh its not going to cost me.. they turned it into the ins company and they covered it. All I am liable for is my deductable.




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JAG5150
01-06-05, 03:08 PM
Then make sure that you inspect the work carefully

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 05:42 PM
oh trust me I will.. I dont get jipped on stuff like that.. Funny thing is that I know more about cars than my husband does..

JAG5150
01-06-05, 05:52 PM
I did not figure that you could be taken advantage of (unless you wanted to be that is)

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 05:55 PM
lol.. most of the time.. oh never mind.. not going to go there.. ROFLMAO






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JAG5150
01-06-05, 06:00 PM
Come on, what would you do without me????

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 06:02 PM
Hey now.. All that is classified information.. and you dont have the security clearance to get that info..
roflmfao





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JAG5150
01-06-05, 06:11 PM
But you don't even know what my security clearance is.

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 06:15 PM
roflmao.. i know what mine is :P.. keep tryin Jag.. keep tryin..



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JAG5150
01-06-05, 06:21 PM
At least I'm not giving up, I'll give it that old Marine Corps spirit.

femalemarine_89
01-06-05, 06:35 PM
LOL.. you keep trying.. just keep trying.. Im mean remember..




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