View Full Version : Be glad You're not my neighbor?

12-25-04, 09:25 AM
So, Jack is a widower, and a neighbor of mine, that lives across the street. He's a nice quite fellow that wouldn't harm any one. Doesn't get out much but likes to dance and I took him over to the VFW once where a couple of wimen hit on him.

But, he was too shy, to follow-up. Every once in awhile I get him to live life on over in the scary section and it adds a bit of excitment to his life and he talks about it for weeks. LMAO

Like last night, we finally confirmed that itís been his next door neighbor, a lady that has for years placed little Christmas gifts in our front door steps for years.

This year, I got a bird feeder, Jack a small house gift and Dave who always has a party at his house about once a month, well he got a lump of coal. LOL

But, then unlike me, he's been naughty... LOL

Well, last night, I got Jack, Dave to go with me over to her house to sing Christmas Carols.

Now, none of us can sing, but that's alright because when we knocked on the door, Dave and I had already decided we would count to three along with Jack, then let him sing alone. LMAO

We'll this morning I got Jack a nice gift.

He now has a girlfriend, but a very jealous girlfriend that stayed over last night, but we don't like her much, too demanding of Jack's time and too controlling.

So, this morning I gave jack a nice gift. Just a simple picture that is signed by Super model
NAOMI CAMPBELL (http://www.naomicampbell.com/main.html) who has graced the covers of hundreds of magazines and is among the top ten super models in America and she models for Victor Secret.

Itís just a nice print...

that says,

Merry Christmas Jack,


and signed Naomi Campbell



It may be a bit too large...



Now, Arn't you glad you are not my neighbor?......


Merry Christmas, everyone!

12-25-04, 09:37 AM
You are a PISTOL Sparrowhawk.

12-25-04, 09:39 AM
Hell Cook....

I would love to have You as my neighbor....

You and I we would never have anyone bother us.....LOL


<a href='http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZNxdm41447US' target='_blank'><img src='http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/8/8_2_58.gif' alt='Merry Christmas Santa' border=0></a>

12-25-04, 03:18 PM
Sgt., I could only hope for a neighbor as motivating as you. Merry Christmas.

12-25-04, 04:08 PM
My friend (gbudd) told me about you. LOL Merry Christmas

12-25-04, 10:04 PM
What's inside the garage? A '53 Corvete? or a '40 Ford? or a '60 MGA? or maybe even a '49 Ford with a flathead eight? Or maybe like I had new, a '63 1/2 Falcon Sprint, rag top, V8, 4 speed, black on black on chrome, even under the hood. Tach on the dash. Lived right up the road from Riverside then. Top down most of the time. As Archie Bunker would say, "Those were the days"!---lol


12-25-04, 11:46 PM
i would be blasting cook with a paint ball gun every time i seen him in the yard.. cause i know hes up to no good..

12-26-04, 12:20 AM
Your right cowboy, bt at least it is a "good" kind of "no good". Ya keep me laughing Cook. Merry Christmas!

12-26-04, 02:00 AM
hrscowboy, you bring up an interesting scenario... god forbid more than one of any of us lived in the same neighborhood.. the opportunities for assorted flavors of suburban warfare would be... innumerable.

12-26-04, 04:44 AM
Hey, Cook, watch your 180, you know what they say about payback.

Sgt. Smitty
01-03-05, 11:54 AM
OK guys, lets all pack up and make up our own lil community where we can have all the FRIENDLY urban warfare we can handle.......LMAO..........just the kind of neighbors we all need to keep the blood flowin and keep us alive and on our toes!!!!!!!

01-03-05, 11:59 AM
Urban warfare?
Don't forget to look up after you kick the door in. LOL You gents remind me of the grown up version of the Little Rascals. Riverside will never be the same. Good for you! LMAO

01-03-05, 12:12 PM

that is the coolest thing i have ever seen. I'm all for this neighborhood, i say we base it in las vegas. we all live on the same block.

We could have a reality show, kinda like that show "Starting over". Marines of all ages living on a block, what kind of pranks would be taking place? I can see the ad now.

::Insert pic of Iwo Jima memorial::

::insert pic of Iron Mike statue::

::EGA pic::

'These are timeless images of Americas struggle for freedom, those pictures shown are Marines doing what they do best, winning America's battles. Now take a group of Marine veterans with various ages and backgrounds, place them all on a city block, they are the community watch.'

'The drama is real...'

::cut to five guys sitting around on couches and chairs::

"Anyone wanna play spades?"


'The action is intense...'

::cut to the oldest Marine cutting the cake at the birthday ball::

'And the paintballs are real...'

::youngest Marines gets splattered with red and gold paintballs after getting off work::

Sgt. Smitty
01-03-05, 12:15 PM
Hey Gary, think we could get us all together and build a clubhouse?

01-03-05, 12:51 PM
What was that little trollup's name who used to hang around Alfalfa or anybody else who had a new coaster? We need to find a grown up version.. say.....Anna Nichol Smith. LOL We might have to build a larger clubhouse.

01-03-05, 01:07 PM
is getting Married.

I don't like his choice, and sometimes Jack can be easily swayed by women. So to help him, or to protect him, I wrote up a prenuptial agreement for him to sign, and both Dave my next door neighbor and I signed it and took it over last night for Jack to sign it.

It's legal and binding since we signed it, I told Jack but Jack still is thinking it over.

Prenuptial Agreement

between Jack and Joline

In case anything happens to Jack, the kid's

get everthing.

That is Dave and Cook

Signed ________

Signed Cook

Signed Dave

01-03-05, 01:14 PM
Sounds Excellent to me.

01-03-05, 01:15 PM
...Just another Palimony suing ready to happen. LMAO Good luck!

01-03-05, 01:29 PM
Even the names dont fit, Jack and Joline? Come on, I would rather die alone and cranky than to be refered to as the J couple.

01-03-05, 03:59 PM
Sounds like a hell of a friend, iI wish that I had somebody looking out for me with my first marriage, I was a young, dumb jarhead at the time. Now I'm not so young, hopefully not so dumb and have a great wife. Good looking out cook

01-03-05, 04:56 PM
Originally posted by Sgt. Smitty
OK guys, lets all pack up and make up our own lil community where we can have all the FRIENDLY urban warfare we can handle.......LMAO..........just the kind of neighbors we all need to keep the blood flowin and keep us alive and on our toes!!!!!!!

sMITTY; I'm all for it.

A web site was create just for this idea.

Anyone one that wants to can now join us for free.

But, it is a trail basis.

Just register and log in.

We now have our our own web site that is purely dedicated to those type of people just like us that a bit strange in the head...




FRIENDLY Urban Warfare Website (FUWW) (http://leatherneck.com/)

01-03-05, 05:17 PM
Very nicely done cook although I think that some of are a little bit more than a bit strange in the head, myself included. After all we are Marines are we not.
Semper Fi

01-03-05, 07:04 PM
lock and load cook i got my red and gold paint balls and my new remington automatic sure fire paint ball machine gun that works on aerosol cans and man its fast and hits hard.

Sgt. Smitty
01-04-05, 10:52 AM
Ya think we could get Mr. Rogers to referee the neighborhood? Don't laugh, from what i here Mr. Rogers was a Marine sniper with a bunch of confirmed kills!!!!!!!!!

01-15-05, 06:54 PM
Jack has a new sweetheart and he's been spending a lot of his time over her place.

Now, we don't mind him doing that, but with him gone we can't raid his garage icebox where he keeps his beer.

Now, we've been complaining of his absence but, well you know how it is, he weights our friendship and a women's, a women's well you know.

Anyways so, it was his birthday and he was of course gone and we couldn't celebrate his birthday with his beer, so while he was gone.

We ran a pink colored pillowcase with the words, "Happy birthday, Jack," up his flag pole.


And since he's not around we figured we'll help him sell his house.... LOL

But we did give him a gift, a walking cane.. LMAO

Now, arenít you glad you're not my neighbor?


Toby M
01-15-05, 07:37 PM
With neighbors like you guys, there is obviously no need for a "neighborhood watch"! (My A**...you need a SWAT team standing by) LOL

01-15-05, 07:55 PM
Hey Cook! Maybe ya shoulda ran a pu**y whipped flag up that flag pole! LMAO

01-15-05, 07:57 PM
Y'know, that show would make millions.... I'm all for it.. besides, it's gotta be better than schlock like "Who's Your Daddy" and "The Will."

01-15-05, 08:04 PM
Now there is a sign: "CLYMAX for Sale by Neighbors." Your plate is really full. I don't know how you find the time. LOL