View Full Version : Marines as Practical Jokers

11-01-04, 11:04 PM
So, did anyone ever pull any really good preactical jokes on any of their fellow Devil Dogs? or see any really good ones pulled off?

Here's one for ya!

There we were, up in the mountains. Cold as HELL at night time, so no one wanted to get out of their sleeping bags at night time to make a head call. Too dang cold for that. So alot of guy's had those big Gatorade bottles in thier bag with em, and they would just use em as a little urinal.

Now, we all know how MRE heaters work right? You poor water on em, and a chemical reaction makesem heat up real fast. Well, if you stick an MRE heater in someones gatorade bottle, and they don't notice it, and they USE it for a urinal, and then screw the lid back on, so as not to get any P#ss on em, what do you think happens? LOL

THAT"S RIGHT! the heat from the MRE heater expands the bottle untill it explodes! LOL. I pulled that during cold weather training in Norway, in late 94! Man, This poor kid I did it too in my squad came flying out of his tent screaming! it was prett dang funny.

anyone else got any good practical jokes they either preformed on another Marine, or saw done?:banana:

11-01-04, 11:22 PM
wasn't designed as a practical joke.

somebody stole a # 10 can of dehydrated shrimp from the mess hall in the rear. we boiled em up in the COs coffee pot. we never drained the pot out. CO made coffee the next morning using the water we left in the pot. he wasn't impressed.

11-01-04, 11:24 PM
come out in the morning throwing a fit did he, Ivalis? what rank was your CO at the time?

11-02-04, 01:33 AM
While in Kuwait after the Gulf war, we were doing NBC training with the Kuwaitee's. I had a Plt Sgt ( Good Guy ) that was just getting annoying becasue he kept telling everyone, "check your gear, check your gas masks". Over and over, too much! Well I noticed that he wasn't checking his so I thought it would be a nice reminder to alter his gear.

Right in the middle of the Training Op with ,high brass looking on and CS in the air, my Sgt puts on his gas mask, clears it and then notices that I have put black tape on the inside of his lens. The words were flying.. and all ya heard was "did you check your gear?"

11-02-04, 02:17 AM
i am amazed non of you guys got killed or a blanket party thrown in your honor...

11-02-04, 03:34 AM
HardJedi you aren't even right Marine! lol I'd have to kick you in your nuts for that one Marine! Didn't your mom tell you that you can shoot your eye out with MRE heater bombs? I plead the fifth on making MRE heater bombs, the ATF could be watching us right now!;)

11-02-04, 06:54 AM
Jedi, you are definatley not right! How did you not end up with his sleeping bag the next night?

11-02-04, 07:55 AM
Quite a few times we took advantage of a Marine sleeping off last nights binge.
Foam shaving cream in each of the sleeping victims hands, a tickle on the nose a few times and....
We once covered a (naked) passed out guy with shaving cream including the plumbing. He was so drunk that he didn't wake up (no fun). We left him sleeping with the shaving cream all over his privates.
Poor guy had cracked nuts for a week.
He was not happy and no one fessed up to the dirty deed.

And, we all must have short sheeted someones bunk at least once.

11-02-04, 08:13 AM
Well this is pretty tame compared to the exploding p*ss bottles...

We were really bored one Sunday afternoon, so we superglued about a dollar in change at the top of barracks stairwell, then laughed like hell when Marines would try to pick up the coins.

That is until one Sergeant outsmarted us and came back with a hammer and chisel! Joke was on us.

11-02-04, 08:50 AM
Originally posted by cjwright90
Jedi, you are definatley not right! How did you not end up with his sleeping bag the next night?

Oh that particular unit was FULL of practical Jokers. some of them, were pretty dangerous. Heck, there was ONE involving a live rattlesnake and the Platoon commander. :)

Heck, I used to like to sleep with my head inside my pillow case ( to drown out my really noisy roomies. So I go to hit the rack one night, stuff my head inside, and someone had dumped three bottles of baby powder inside!

Damn near choked to death :D

11-03-04, 07:46 AM
One night me and a couple of buddies went down to TJ and got our fill and headed back to base and continued the binge in the barracks when someone asked who the OIC was for the night. It ended up being our platoon commander. So we collected all of our empty beer cans and waited until he left Battalion HQ and we made a big beer pyramid out of our empties on the duty desk. Never did get caught for that.

11-03-04, 08:26 AM
Dragged a dead gook out of the Sung Thu Bon River, in Vietnam, one evening and sat him upright on the top of the bridge, next to the flare boxes.

Izzie and Chief two Indians from Wyoming, of course not with my encouragement, left the rope tied to one of the gooks arms.

When unsuspecting Marines from the other platoons came by to get a look at the dead gook sitting upright on the bridge, Izzie would wait till they got up close, then pull on the rope, causing the dead gooks arms to swing up to wave.


Then in the morning we told Jerry Lucero, who we called "TJ" that when he got off watch, he was suppose to wake up the Marine sleeping sitting upright next to the flare box...

Well about 4:00 we heard Lucero trying to wake up the dead gook, when he yanked on the gooks arm, it came off...

Humm, for some reason, Lucero did not think it was that funny... ROTFLMAO

Those were mild ones.... but memorable to the whole company.

11-03-04, 09:54 AM
I was not involved personally with this one, but it was funny.
The company clerk was this slow witted guy. He had real thick, real dark eyebrows. Same for his moustache. He was know for heavy drinking(what Marine was not?) so he was into heavy sleeping, too. He passed out pretty hard one night, so a bunch of guys took it upon themselves to break out the razor. Remember the eyebrows? Shaved half of his eyebrow(yes singular) and the other side of his stash. He went to company formation late because of how he was feeling, so apparently did not look in the mirror. Need I say more?

11-03-04, 03:19 PM
DANG Sparrowhawk! I was actually expeting something like that from the guy's who served in combat zones.

that's pretty dang funny.

11-03-04, 03:50 PM
was the same Marine when he first arrived FNG, we was on a working party laying wire and we sent him to the lieutenants hooch to get an extention cord for the claymore mine...

Then there was the time we send Lucky to the lieutenants hooch to get some ice cream for us.


11-03-04, 03:56 PM
ever send someone to get 100 yards of flight line or a prc-e4 from comm? always worth a good laugh.

11-03-04, 04:03 PM
Send a boot to Maintenance Control with a maf bag. Filled with air and tell him it's jet exhaust for a test.

11-03-04, 05:49 PM
Or send the same boot to the line shack with a VIDSMAF that reads:

Re-stack I.D.10.T unit and return with MAF to metalshop

Fred Pfeiffer
11-03-04, 06:01 PM
While at the San Diego Naval Hospital, I saw a Navy Corpsman send a young Marine out to look for a "sterile fallopian tube". Another was sent to the dental department to find a "10mm diastema". This guy had a warped sense of humor.

Look them up for yourself at dictionary.com if you don't know what they are.

11-03-04, 06:34 PM
Ok, NOW it's time forthe Live rattlesnake joke.

See, I was in 1st platoon, Alpha Co. 2nd LAR, at thje time.

We had this brand new boot 2nd Lt. he was terrified of snakes.
He was also abit of a know-it-all jerk, who kept trampling all over everyone, and wouldn't even listen to the Platoon Sgt.

So there we were, doing a CAX out in 29 Palms. I was the leader for a scout team, and we were doing a night recon. Just walking along and you hear the very distinctive sound or a rattlesnake nearby. We brake out the flashlights, so as not to get bit, we broke out the flashlights.

Now, I had this one crazy kid in my team, from somewhere in the boonies of the Ozark mountains, and he yells out,

" I'm gonna catch me that sucker! "

and just like that he reaches out and snags a live p.o.'d rattlesnake! He tiook a bunch of bootbands and string and bassically tied the things mouth shut, then put it in a big plastic bag and sealed it. I TOLD him to get rid of the darn thing, but he said he wanted to show it to the platoon Sgt, who had a couple pet snakes. Me, being OBVIOUSLY out of my mind, let him keep it for that reason.

when we got back to base camp, I went to sleep. about a half hour later, I hear the LT scream like the devil himself is after him. I shoot up, look around, and the LT is just screaming " SNAKE SNAKE SNAKE SNAKE!"

I just started laughing.

this kid had shown the SSGT his catch, adn then the SSGT had taken the snake, and set it down next to the sleeping LT, and started proding it till it rattled. :D thought the poor guy was gonna have a heart attack!

Fortunatley, no one gotin trouble, cause they killedthe snake, and then untied it beforethe LT got back from his little midnight run. :D

11-03-04, 06:47 PM
Out @ 29 Palms for CAX with VMA (am) 533 a bunch of us had a few beers and thought it was time for the Old Man to get up so we throw fireworks into his tent. At first he was mad as hell. And gave him a beer. And no one got in trouble that time.

11-03-04, 07:23 PM
hardjedi, he was a 1st LT.

11-03-04, 07:29 PM
Huh? Nope. Ivalis. Deffinatley a 2nd LT. Fresh out of VMI and OCS. I can even remember his first and last name, and the god awfull big ears the guy had.

why would you tell me he was a 1st?

11-03-04, 09:15 PM
This happened about a month after Charles S. Robb, Lyndon B. Johnson son-in-law became India 3/7 Company Commander. the story is included in my book, “Dreams of Glory” © <br />
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11-03-04, 09:21 PM
jedi, i must of misunderstood the question, my CO was a 1st lt

11-04-04, 07:26 AM
AHHH! ok, sorry, I thought you were refering to MY story Ivalis. I had completely forgotten that I had asked about YOUR CO. my bad! LOL

11-04-04, 02:11 PM
jedi, ya can't confuse me, i start the day confused, lol

11-05-04, 06:14 PM
While not a practical joke, it's a great revenge story.

Everyone knows that unannounced spot room inspections happen from time to time. I would know after such an inspection because there would a beer missing from the 'fridge every time. Well, one day they took my last one. I didn't get angry, I got even. I went out, bought a six pack, and drank the whole thing. Anybody who drinks beer know that you don't buy beer, you only rent it, so I let nature run its course into the last bottle, replaced the top, and placed it back in the 'fridge, making sure to tell my rack mate that I was saving it for later so he wouldn't drink it. Well, it wasn't two days later when we came in from noon chow when we noticed the faint smell of urine coming from the sink. I did a quick check of the garbage can and no bottle. I never had a problem with the "Marine Raider of Refridgerators" after that. My only guess is that the "inspector" had a change of heart after a mouthfull of recycled hops and barley.

Anyone want a beer?

11-06-04, 06:50 AM
LOL! sweet, Will. absolutley Classic! :D

01-04-05, 06:09 PM
We used to send boots to the comm. shack and ask the gunny for a prickE-7 or send them for a bravo alpha 1100 november (balloon) with a retention line.