View Full Version : Girlfriend before boot camp
tylerreel
03-29-11, 02:08 PM
last weekend i hooked up with a girl and asked her out, i like her, but thts it, not love or anything, i leave for bootcamp in June. My mind is tellib me to break up with her, becasue i know its not gonna last boot camp and all the other training, so i did, but now i feel bad because shes upset not, did i do the right thing? has anyone else done this?
SoonToBe3521
03-29-11, 03:07 PM
If she's still there waiting for you when you get back, get your girl. If she's not, wasn't meant to be. Do not go into bootcamp thinking about her though, keep your focus in the right place. Right now, it may seem mean, but she's not your priority.
Seeing if your girl can stay faithful after 13weeks apart would have been a good test to see if she was worth staying with.
That being said if you don't have strong feelings for her anyway then staying with her when she has those feelings for you just because she feels bad would be wrong and unfair for her.
MunkyVsRobot
03-29-11, 04:25 PM
Id say waste of time bro. You are 17 still young unless you are considering VERY highly of marrying this girl id hit the eject button before you go to MCRD and wait to meet some one either in fleet or after your enlistment.
You are going to be gone for 3 months for boot camp, then youll be back for 10 days then depending on your MOS youll go either to ITB or MCT. If you are non infantry after that month of MCT you go to your MOS school then off to fleet.
So unless you can get stationed somewhere in or around FLA I'd say eject.
Honcho1010
03-29-11, 04:54 PM
Dude last weekend? Let her go before you actually care about her. Keep the friendship, I'm sure you'll be looking for a good time after boot camp. My girlfriend just broke up with me, after a year and half. im sure boot camp had something to do with it.
PooleeGewarges
03-29-11, 06:07 PM
How about you fill in your profile. Where is your recruiters information? Sgt. Leprechaun will send in the helicopters if you do not fill in your profile fully.
Also, correct grammar is a must. You are not texting in a Marine Corps forum.
IHaveEGA843
03-29-11, 07:09 PM
Last weekend? Seriously?
You should've kept her as a pen pal though.
Breaking up with a girl and staying friends is like your dog dying and your mom saying you can keep it.... I know, I've done it a few times, but really I am a romantic and only know how to treat a girl how she should be treated even if it drives her away (women like to be treated badly until they are totally head over heals). Do what is right, not what is logical.
IHaveEGA843
03-29-11, 07:28 PM
^Bro it was last weekend......seriously theres no time in it for them to even get to know each other really.
If you said 6 mnths-yr then my answer would be different but thats like you meeting the best looking woman you've ever gotten and trying to hold on to her by writing letters. Trust me bro it will NOT work because the AFFECTION and ATTENTION factor is not there. If she doesn't have real DEEP FEELINGS for him and doesn't become selfish in HER NEEDS AND WANTS then it will work. I'd said keep her as a friend though then after you've finished majority of your training THEN pursue the relationship and grow to know each other.
^Bro it was last weekend......seriously theres no time in it for them to even get to know each other really.
If you said 6 mnths-yr then my answer would be different but thats like you meeting the best looking woman you've ever gotten and trying to hold on to her by writing letters. Trust me bro it will NOT work because the AFFECTION and ATTENTION factor is not there. If she doesn't have real DEEP FEELINGS for him and doesn't become selfish in HER NEEDS AND WANTS then it will work. I'd said keep her as a friend though then after you've finished majority of your training THEN pursue the relationship and grow to know each other.
I might be old fashion in that sense. Hell, I love to party more than most...A lot more than most. Yet I would never ask a girl out that I didn't already know for a while and could see myself having children with. The girl I want right now I've known for at least 2 years.
IHaveEGA843
03-29-11, 07:42 PM
Well build that relationship then if you think its worth it. I'm sure this guy hasn't done what you've done but you really have to find a understanding female who will put aside her wants to know her potential/current bf is going to better himself for the outlook of them or just going to bootcamp for the next 13 weeks.
Most women WILL NOT see that and will go with the next man approaching her. It's rare to find a woman like that and I will say my lady is like that. See knows I want this and I'm going to do it but knows the rewards of this once I've completed it.
achilles097
03-29-11, 07:52 PM
last weekend i hooked up with a girl and asked her out, i like her, but thts it, not love or anything, i leave for bootcamp in June. My mind is tellib me to break up with her, becasue i know its not gonna last boot camp and all the other training, so i did, but now i feel bad because shes upset not, did i do the right thing? has anyone else done this?
In my POV, i think you did the right thing. I also agree with Taviah, that whole friends after dating doesn't work. Been there done that. You look at her and some feelings rush back, you know it, she knows it, normally it's just plain awkward. That whole "being friends" ... That's basically so that the dumper doesn't feel bad. It's just plain moving on. You're looking at 5+ months of training (MCRD + SOI and/or MOS school) without that girl.
I am going to be straight up about this but if you're posting on a forum about a girl you met last weekend is just a tad bit not smart (trying to avoid helicopters here forgive my wording) especially on a forum about the Marine Corps.
It shows that you are not mature in a sense of age wise because you are falling for girls just from "hooking up", also asking a girl out doesn't and should not mean "were together now" unless you flat out just said "will you be my girlfriend?"
It also shows that your priorities aren't straight, your main focus should be boot camp and not some girl you are going to end up worrying about if she didnt write you and wondering if Jodie stole her from you. Check the ask a marine section or even google it most relationships don't last through boot camp if they weren't going strong already.
Next time I would recommend posting this as a status update on Facebook that seems more if a fitting place for this question.
In my POV, i think you did the right thing. I also agree with Taviah, that whole friends after dating doesn't work. Been there done that. You look at her and some feelings rush back, you know it, she knows it, normally it's just plain awkward. That whole "being friends" ... That's basically so that the dumper doesn't feel bad. It's just plain moving on. You're looking at 5+ months of training (MCRD + SOI and/or MOS school) without that girl.
I have to say (since you're agreeing with me) that I don't agree with my advise, will always give it the same but never follow it. Yeah, that is how I believe but time and time again I have stayed friends with my exes and been completely happy and OK with it. I have never in my life been able to find a person that I can possibly hate (besides political) I have a tendency to love whoever I am with unconditionally whether I continue to be with them or not.
DudefromDiego
03-29-11, 09:32 PM
Dude, let her go. Doesn't seem like you have been together that long, and while it may seem like it is meant to be, all relationships seem to start off like that. Example: I had a girl and we were together for about 3 1/2 years. I went to every single one of her soccer matches (even traveled out to Colorado to root her on) and the minute she realizes I'm going to be leaving in June of 11' (at the time, my ship date has since changed) she starts asking what I'm doing with my life, and that I clearly don't care enough about her if I am willing to go away for X amount of time. It struck a nerve. I mean really? I don't need somebody who will likely hook up with jody while I am getting "motivated" in boot camp. I did care about her, but this was something I wanted to do, and she didn't support it. So I said later and we split. You my friend can easily dump her. You need to get some priorities, and babes will always be there. The last thing you need in boot camp is wondering if your woman is catching the meat train from jody.
IHaveEGA843
03-30-11, 07:31 AM
Dude, let her go. Doesn't seem like you have been together that long, and while it may seem like it is meant to be, all relationships seem to start off like that. Example: I had a girl and we were together for about 3 1/2 years. I went to every single one of her soccer matches (even traveled out to Colorado to root her on) and the minute she realizes I'm going to be leaving in June of 11' (at the time, my ship date has since changed) she starts asking what I'm doing with my life, and that I clearly don't care enough about her if I am willing to go away for X amount of time. It struck a nerve. I mean really? I don't need somebody who will likely hook up with jody while I am getting "motivated" in boot camp. I did care about her, but this was something I wanted to do, and she didn't support it. So I said later and we split. You my friend can easily dump her. You need to get some priorities, and babes will always be there. The last thing you need in boot camp is wondering if your woman is catching the meat train from jody.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO GET TO!!!!!
She obviously put her wants first before even considering what you're striving to do. SELFISHNESS......
I am basically in the opposite, the girl I want has a son with a guy that I know, she broke up with him as he has no ambition, and treated her and his son with indifferent neglect, I liked him well enough but I can't respect him and yet she is confused, and stuff...So instead of me breaking everything off with her she wants to break it off with me and stay friends as she figures out her life and proves to herself that she is independent, that she doesn't want to be in a relationship right now with anyone. Yet she has feelings for me, and I know that she wants me like I want her. She says she'll probably have her answers when I get back from boot camp but wants to stay friends for now.
I honestly know that I want to spend the rest of my life with her and I want to help her raise her son as my own and have more children with her (Preferably twin girls, but who knows).
IHaveEGA843
03-30-11, 07:09 PM
I saw your thread on your situation in the "Ask a Marine" forums....
Regardless of your decision to be with her or not, a man who can take care of another man's child as if the child was his own gets the upmost respect from me. Taking someone elses responsibility and handling yourself takes alot of heart, time and devotion especially with child.
DudefromDiego
03-30-11, 07:26 PM
I honestly know that I want to spend the rest of my life with her and I want to help her raise her son as my own and have more children with her (Preferably twin girls, but who knows).
Wait... you're not even with her and you want to spend the rest of your life with her? That's very curious....
How about you fill in your profile. Where is your recruiters information? Sgt. Leprechaun will send in the helicopters if you do not fill in your profile fully.
Also, correct grammar is a must. You are not texting in a Marine Corps forum.
Jesus christ, I'm not going to even fight you on that, I'm just going to shake my head..
OP, lead her on as f*ck buddy because she's going to break your heart, it's obvious that you're naive, the feelings you have probably aren't mutual. Might as well get some poon out of the situation.
PooleeGewarges
03-30-11, 08:32 PM
Jesus christ, I'm not going to even fight you on that, I'm just going to shake my head..
OP, lead her on as f*ck buddy because she's going to break your heart, it's obvious that you're naive, the feelings you have probably aren't mutual. Might as well get some poon out of the situation.
Fight? In a forum? You got problems kid. Your still upset about the last thread. Calm it down. :mad:
Edit: Don't throw your anger at me when a Marine gets on your ass. I've seen most of your posts, and you like to act like a smart** most of the time. Your attitude disgusts me.
Wait... you're not even with her and you want to spend the rest of your life with her? That's very curious....
Well I've been with her for a while, not exactly in a traditional sense, and I've known her really well for a few years.
Fight? In a forum? You got problems kid. Your still upset about the last thread. Calm it down. :mad:
Edit: Don't throw your anger at me when a Marine gets on your ass. I've seen most of your posts, and you like to act like a smart** most of the time. Your attitude disgusts me.
At least I have a body part that contains intelligence even if it is my ass.
Yeah, that just happened. Marines are not gods, as a poolee you treat them with with respect, you don't have to suck their d*ck.
RBrouse
03-31-11, 02:42 AM
I think what you did was for the best I was with a girl for over 6 months, sense two days before I went to MEPS and I have known her all through out high school and 2 days a go she left me 12 days before I'm supposed to ship out. trust me you don't want to have to deal with the bull**** that comes with a girl. I even thought I would spend the rest of my life with this girl and had a ticket for her for my graduation which is now money down the god damn drain. trust me all girls are *****es and don't waste your time on relationships, just get as much poon as you can till you get out then look for a relationship thats what I'm going to try and do
PooleeGewarges
03-31-11, 05:18 AM
At least I have a body part that contains intelligence even if it is my ass.
Yeah, that just happened. Marines are not gods, as a poolee you treat them with with respect, you don't have to suck their d*ck.
Listen, no one here has time for your bull****. You want to act like a moron, do it somewhere else. BTW, it is not sucking their d*ck, or however you want to call it, it is simply obeying the rules of the forum. You must not know that because you think your on top of everything, always putting everyone down to your so called "intelligence". Grow up. And I'm starting to feel as if you are making multiple accounts. Get a life. My arguement with you is over.
IHaveEGA843
03-31-11, 06:56 AM
LMAO @ the "bickering"
great stuff to read while at work
kjohnson8824
03-31-11, 08:47 AM
Taviah, how can you even think about having kids? Old school, maybe, but I think insane is more like it! Just focus on getting through Boot Camp uninjured. Trust me youll drop that girl like old news once your in. There are going to be plenty of girls on base that needs looooooots of lovin. hahahaha
Sekhmet
03-31-11, 10:01 AM
trust me all girls are *****es and don't waste your time on relationships, just get as much poon as you can till you get out then look for a relationship thats what I'm going to try and do
Just like all dudes are cheaters and misogynists, amirite?
Generalizations are fun!
(Also, just to be clear--because I'm sure a lot of people are going to get their balls in a bunch over this--I don't actually think this, I'm just trying to say that just because one chick was a ***** doesn't mean we all are.)
stupidmotards
03-31-11, 10:12 AM
Just like all dudes are cheaters and misogynists, amirite?
Generalizations are fun!
(Also, just to be clear--because I'm sure a lot of people are going to get their balls in a bunch over this--I don't actually think this, I'm just trying to say that just because one chick was a ***** doesn't mean we all are.)
yes you are
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=woySeSNBL3o&feature=related
Taviah, how can you even think about having kids? Old school, maybe, but I think insane is more like it! Just focus on getting through Boot Camp uninjured. Trust me youll drop that girl like old news once your in. There are going to be plenty of girls on base that needs looooooots of lovin. hahahaha
Because I have three goals in my life. 1. Become a Marine 2. Be with the girl I love 3. Start a successful business. I don't want to get married or have kids within the next couple years. The only thing is that right now having 1 with 2 and 3 is impossible, I have to wait for 4-5 years for 3, and probably after boot or even a few years for 2, but my first goal I can have now.
kjohnson8824
03-31-11, 01:20 PM
Hey Taviah I just realized we have the same MOS and the same ship date. Are you going to PI and if so what battalion are you in?
RBrouse
04-01-11, 02:09 PM
Just like all dudes are cheaters and misogynists, amirite?
Generalizations are fun!
(Also, just to be clear--because I'm sure a lot of people are going to get their balls in a bunch over this--I don't actually think this, I'm just trying to say that just because one chick was a ***** doesn't mean we all are.)
Ok fair enough Not All girls are *****es but so far the girls I met are, and she was the cheater, I actually know of more girls that cheat than guys. Also I think you can blame my Ex for making me act like a misogynist. sorry bout that
Honcho1010
04-01-11, 07:35 PM
I really wish luck to anyone in a relationship before the Marines. its possible to make it last. Just make sure she's the quiet type haha.
I am going SD, I live in Arizona and my RS is 60 miles away in Utah.