View Full Version : How did YOU guys talk to your parents about enlsiting?
Zach Curtis
12-04-10, 09:53 PM
This thread sort of branches off my other thread, but basicly my father has said if I join the Marines after high school he will disown me and I can forget letters from the family. I have tried showing him the site he won't have any of it. And I can forget about him talking to a recruiter, I know in the end its my choice I'll be 18 and I can do what I want. I would just very much appreciat the support of my family.
With that said, how did you guys talk to your parents what were there reactions? Share your stories and experinces please.
Zach
Muddyblaster
12-05-10, 10:56 AM
With me my dad said the same thing. However on my 18th birthday, I walked in by then my recruiter had my job ready and I signed on the line. My dad was ****ed at first, but then backed me up. Just remember that its your life.
AKA HITMAN
12-05-10, 04:45 PM
I always worked construction. My Pops was in the Navy and said try the SeaBees, they were jammed up, so walked next door and picked up Motor T. from my recruiter, Pops was pizzed as he really wanted me to go in the Navy. After awhile he got used to being upstaged by a Jarhead in the house as Mom really made a big deal of it. And to be honest with you that wasn't such a bad thing.
Muhreen4Lyfe
12-05-10, 05:39 PM
Well, just wait until you're out of high school, enlist and make sure you get the job you want. Otherwise he'll try to kick you out before you get that diploma, which would be bad.
...basicly my father has said if I join the Marines after high school he will disown me and I can forget letters from the family.
Zach
Obviously we don't know anything about your relationship with your father or your family - but maybe I can lend a little perspective since my son is only a little older than you are.
It is sad that you father has laid out this ultimatum. Chances are, he still doesn't see you as an adult or anywhere near being an adult. Ultimately, the decision is his - whether or not he'll carry through with this threat. And if he is successful in getting you to not enlist, what's next? Will he threaten to disown you if you:
a) don't go to college
b) choose to go to community college
c) take a job out of town
d) choose to marry the "wrong" girl
e) (fill in the blank)
In the meantime, here is what I would suggest - Sometimes it's tough for parents to realize that their children are no longer the little kids that they read bedtime stories to. Make a big (and I mean BIG) effort to demonstrate to your parents that you are no longer a little kid. You need to do this through actions moreso than words. You need to demonstrate that you have developed a strong sense of initiative and responsibility - and that they don't need to ride you butt to get you to do stuff (homework, pick up after yourself, get out of bed in the morning, come in on time at night, helping out around the house). Seriously. High school graduation is in about six months - get in six full months of acting like an adult in every aspect of your life, and chances are your parents will recognize that and start treating you like an adult.
Ultimately, it's your choice to enlist or not - and it's a choice that you and your family will have to live with - so do your research, make sure that you know what you are getting in to, and, well, man-up, make it happen, and handle the consequences as they may fall.
micarr57
12-05-10, 07:24 PM
when i first talked to my parents about joining my mom was non-commital but my dad was totally against it i was underage at the time and had to have one parent sign for me my mom finally did my dad was against it from the start clear up till they came to graduation after that i think his mind was changed when they came for visitors day before graduation neither one recognized me even after i talked to them was different
bottom line it's your life and your decision
Zach,
03Mike has the best suggestion for you. You parents will continue with just stating no or giving you ultimatums as long as they view you as a child. Follow his suggestions and as you approach 18, talk with your parents again. Tell them that while you respect their beliefs...this is something you feel you must do. Remind them that freedom isn't free and you are paying it forward for your family. If they continue with the threats and other statements....then you need to determine what is the most important thing to you. Parents are protective and yours seem to be a bit overly protective.
Don't rush things.... prove you are an adult to them. When you are 18...talk to them a final time and then decide if you want to join. If you decide to join...talk to your buds and your ladies to write you while at boot. You will survive either way but letters always make it a bit easier.
Good luck to you.
Why the marines. And no guys I am not trying to talk him out of it. Just wanna know that you are doing it for the right reasons. Is it for college. is it to impress the chicks. Do you need to prove something. Why do you wanna join Our beloved Corps. No I am not trying to make you feel bad. I just wanna know if you are thinking of My Corps in the right light. if you know that you are being called to duty. I guess like a Sky Pilot. To his vocation. Then yes join. If you do not feel the call from your gut. Then do not join. And if you do feel the call. Then what I would say to your Parents Cause it aint just your father Involved in this the rest of your family. Has a right to chime in for you are involving them. At least as far as an emotional investment. In your safety and thier fears for you. Sit down and talk to them all. Like an adult speak your peace. For if you do join our ranks. Trust me marines tend to tell it like it is. If we are given an order that is just hairbrained claptrap. Trust me we in the form of our elder NCO's Speak Up. Then we follow our orders like Good Marines. But no Commander in his right mind discounts the words of his NCO's. And ever since Chesty was a Looie Most of our Commanders will speak up before we have to. But back to the question. If you are gonna be one of us. And if you are gonna join our ranks. Get some cojones and talk to them. Do not be afraid of speaking your mind.